EPISODES

DEMOLITION

The old house was deemed a health hazard as opposed to a 'seat of learning' so we university students, Britains future, had to face eviction and the demolition of our home, not only from the fascist bully boys at Town Hall, Vyvyan was doing a pretty good job aswell.

Vyv- Brilliant! But my car got a bit of a dent in the rear fender.
Rick-There was nothing wrong with that old house it wasnt a health hazard at all, the council is just a bunch of fascist bully boys against youth development!
Neil- Next time I'll get a shorter rope
Mike- I think I looked rather sharp in this episode, the golfing look is really in this summer.

OIL
We moved into our new found residence, (giant gents toilet block look alike) Vyvyan struck oil in the basement, we had to hold a workers revolution to overthrow evil Oil Baron Mike and then held a rock and roll benefit in the drawing room, oh and it was lentils for tea again....all in all one of our more eventful days.

Vyv- You broke my cricket bat you bastard!
Rick-That band really was appalling! Remind me not to book them for the next Anti-NeoNazi Ascosiation Tiddly Winks Championships.
Neil- As an oppressed worker of the house I think I deserve the refund of my 50p for the concert.
Mike- I think those shades were very fetching on me, infact the whole 'evil dictator' look was a pretty sharp statement.

BORING
This shows that life as a student isnt all sex and partying, infact a lot of the time its incredibly dull.

Vyv- I had to perform major surgery to recover that bloody finger you know!
Rick-If I have to sit on the rickety chair again I'm phoning the Pigs and calling it child abuse!
Neil- I never did finish digging my grave.
Mike- Vyvyan, I've told you once I've told you an infinate number of times, keep your mother away from me!

BOMB

Do you ever have on of those days ? First a nuclear bomb is blocking the fridge so I didnt get a proper breakfast which is enough to make anyone ratty in the least and then the bloody TV liscence man calls and we have to get Vyv to eat the telly so I missed a very interesting documentary on Marxism in the 20th century.

Vyv- TVs don't 'arf give you wind
Rick-Tell us about it Vyvyan!
Neil- Anyone seen my copy of Protect and Survive?
Mike- Ahh Neil we ran out of toilet paper last week and Vyv used the fold out 'Build Your Own Bomb Shelter using only a Fairy Liquid bottle and some sticky back plastic' as hamster bedding for SPG.

INTERESTING

As parties go I think this one was up there with some of the most disasterous and embarrassing events ever, lets just say this was a bigger disaster than my 6th birthday party, I dont want to go into what happened to Zippo the Clown. Ahh its funny how one can laugh in retrospect.....I'm sure that time will come.

Vyv- Well I had a good time!
Rick-Vyv your medical student friends are'nt coming to our next party!
Neil- That was the worst party ever! I cant believe someone would put meat in a giant sandwich.
Mike- Never did hear from that bird in the posh frock again. Was it something I said?

FLOOD

Some git set my sociology file on fire while we were playing hide and seek, a whole terms worth of work quite literally up in flames! Oh yes and London was under 50ft of water at the time and Vyvyan turned our landlord into an axe wielding homicidal maniac, but I think the overall importance of the episode lay with the destruction of my work (plus there was the September edition of Nudie Playbunnies go to Vegas hidden in that file!)

Vyv- Well its proof that my potion works, now all I need is funding for public trials.!
Rick-I still dont think its a laughing matter.
Neil-I cant believe you all tried to eat me.
Mike- Thats me, cool and calm in a crisis.