Episode 2
"No," she said.
"No?" repeated Leighanne.
"No," confirmed Lorelei, in her mind thinking "She Knows."
"okay," said Leighanne cheerfully. "Well, I gotta go. Nice talking to you!" and she trotted off to her car and drove off on the long, black road.
Lorelei breathed a sigh of relief and entered her home.
* * *
Eva sat amidst a circle of burning candles and various items of Howard, clutching a framed picture of him and gazing at it longlingly.
"If Kathryne is what you want," she smirked, "then Kathryne is what you'll get."
She gingerly set down the photograph of her love and picked up a lock of Kathryne's French-Vanilla colored hair and a pair of green contact lenses.
"First step, I've got to look like her," she whispered.
* * *
"Welcome, Mr. Gallant," greeted the lawyer, leading Zachary, who is gay, into his office. "I'm Joseph Kahn."
Zachary glanced Joseph up and down before they both took a seat. Mr. Kahn was Vietnamese or something and chubby - not Zachary's type.
"Nice to meet you, Mr. Kahn," replied Zachary deeply.
"Now then, what's this case you would like me to take on?" questioned Joseph Kahn, leaning forward on his edsk and folding his hands. "Is there a pimp wolf involved? I'm your pimp wolf expert."
Zachary frowned in a very gay way. "No. I was attacked, and I would like to sue Mandy Willaford."
"Really. Describe the attack."
"Well, I was um, making a pass at a friend, who er, happens to be her boyfriend, and she leapt on my back and started pelting on me."
"Were there any injuries?"
"Well, no."
Joseph Kahn sighed and began to tap his pen on the desk. "Well Mr. Gallant," he said levelly, "this is no pimp wolf at all. What we have here is a case of an average, jealous girlfriend - no case whatsoever. I'm sorry."
Zachary, who is gay, stoof up furiously. "we'll see about that," he spat. "I'll make it so you never work with any pimp wolves again, Joseph Kahn!"
* * *
Kevin and Kristen sat outside among the flourishing flowers in the garden Kristen had so lovingly tended. Kathryne's voice echoed in her head. "I think you should tell him.... it's better to be honest.... I think you should tell him.... I think you should tell him."
Kristen placed her wine glass down on the veranda table and looked up at Kevin nervously. He was gazing obliviously out across the yard.
"Kevin," she said cautiously, taking his hand. He looked at her with worry immediately, holding her two hands. "I've got something to tell you - and it isn't easy... but I've got to. Kevin - I'm - I'm - I'm pregnant."
Kevin looked at her in shock, his eyes searching her face. "You're shitting me," he breathed.
* * *
"Obie," Lorelei told her friend, distraught, "You're my pal. You gotta help me. I've gotten myself in a mess and I don't know what to do."
Obie Morant took a deep drag off his Marlboro and leaned back, letting out a stream of "O's." "You just tell Doctor Obie now, Lorelei, and we'll see if he can fix you up."
He started drumming on his bongoes as Lorelei confided to him in a secretive voice.
"Dude - here's the deal - I can't decide between my b-balling Brian and my alleycat Alexander - I know Alexander is my one, but I can't have just one man, I need more. And I think Leighanne suspects - and she's my friend! and she's with Brian!"
Obie ceased to slap his bongos and stared straight ahead. He took a puff of his cig. "And she's ... with Brian?"
"Like I said," replied Lorelei.
Obie took a swig of his beer and started up beating his bongos again. "Well that is a problem," he agreed.
"What do I do?"
Obie thought. "Sounds like a problem for Guido."
"Really?"
He paused. "Really," he replied, and took another swig of beer.
* * *
Alexander drummed his fingers on the glossy living room table. "I've got to get a drink," he murmured to himself. "The Stump Club is having specials all night." He perked. "But who could I bring?" He sits up suddenly and arches one eyebrow. "Nickolas!"
A few minutes later he had driven down the long, black road and arrived at Nickolas's house. Knock . . . knock.. . . knock.
Nickolas answered the door in a long-sleeved black turtleneck and black pants with glasses, holding that day's Wall Street Journal at his side.
"Yes?" he said.
"Did you know that the Stump Club opened their new video poker gameroom?" Alexander queried.
The Wall Street Journal fluttered to the floor.
"Really?" Nickolas questioned.
"Really."
"Well then let's go."
With that, the two strode off to Alexander's long, sleek.... black Expedition. They arrived at the Stump Club a few mintures later. Nickolas spotted the gameroom and immediately headed over. Alexander meanwhile spotted ome hunnies with alcohol at the bar.
"Yay," he thought. "Sorry, Lorelei."
Alexander strutted over to the Bog Bar feeling compelled to sit his Be-hind down on the bar stool. Sometimes.... like now.... the Bog Bar seemed as if it were his only friend.
The hours passed and eventually Nickolas ran out of quarters.
"Damn, I'm out of quarters," Nickolas said. He sauntered over to the Bog Bar to get some quarters from Alexander. "Oh my," he remarked noticing Alexander passed out on the floor. "He's out of quarters also."
On the top of the bar Nickolas noticed a dozen shot glasses lined up.
"Oh my," Nickolas said.... again; considering the possibility of a drinking problem. "I'm suspicious," he said.
"You're... suspicious?" the bartender, Willy, noted as he cleared the area.
Nick narrowed his eyes. "I'm suspicious."
* * *
That night, at dusk, Kathryne sat with Billy on her porch with quitars at hand. Practicing their guitars together had always been one of the two's favorite past-times.
Kathryne disturbed the peaceful strumming with a sigh. "I can never get this part," she complained.
"It's not hard," Billy said gently, reaching over to demonstrate on Kathryne's guitar. "Just place you fingers..." he told her softly, then stopped mid-sentence and looked into her green eyes. He took a deep breath and licked his lips. "I'm sorry, Kathryne," he said, right before he kissed her.
At the same time, Mandy was out for her evening jog on the long, black road. She just so happened to be jogging by as Billy and Kathryne were kissing on the front porch, guitars forgotten. Mandy's eyes widened as she tried to act nonchalant continuing to jog by.
"Howard must know," she thought aloud.
* * *
Brian and Leighanne arrived at Zachary and Lorelei's very gay-ly decorated house with Tyk. Knock.... knock..... knoc.
Lorelei answered the door shortly and smiled warmly. "So glad you could make it. Zachary!" she called.
Zachary, who is gay, arrived at the door clapping. "Oh goody, Leighanne's here. Are you ready for our rendezvous?"
Leighanne laughed and gave Brian a kiss goodbye. "Of course. Thanks for keeping Brian company, Lorelei. Bye now!"
And Leighanne and Zachary pranced off to shop.
Brian stepped inside the house and closed to door behind him, dropping Tyk to the floor. Lorelei gazed at him, and he gazed right back.
"Well?" he murmured.
"Oh yes ... I've got that.... something for you," smiled Lorelei mischeiviously. They left for the back of the house, leaving Tyk alone with Lorelei's dog, Mocha.
"woof," growled Tyk.
"Row-ow-ow," returned Mocha.
"Yo quiero Mocha," purred Tyk, just like the Taco Bell dog, and they slipped through the doggy door.
* * *
Mandy was continuing to jog down the long, black road when she passed by the Twin Fountains apartment buildings. Out in front was a crystal blue diving pool where she noticed Howard doing his laps. "I've got to tell him," she thought out loud.
She jogged over to the edge of the pool and waved at Howard. "Yoo-hoo!"
Howard spotted her and waved back calling, "Hey!" He climbed out of the pool, his wet skin gleaming in the street light. His pectorals were showing - he was only in swim trunks.
"Wow," Mandy thought out loud and then walked around to the side of the pool where Howard had gotten out. "I've got something.... unpleasant to tell you."
"Oh... no..." replied Howard D.
"Oh, yes," assured Mandy. She clasped her hands. "I saw Billy and Kathryne on your front porch."
Howard arched his eyebrows.
Mandy placed a hand on his shoulder. "They were kissing."
"Kissing?" Howard gasped.
"Kissing," nodded Mandy.
Howard's face fell. "I can't believe it."
"I'm sorry I had to be the one to tell you," apologized Mandy. "But I've got to finish my jog now." She jogged off.
Howard fell into the pool and just floated there, distraught.
* * *
Leighanne and Brian were in the BMW driving home from Lorelei and Zachary's house. Leighanne shifted in her seat to face Brian who was driving the BMW.
"Brian," she said, "I'm suspicious."
Brian glanced at her. "Why?"
Leighanne narrowed her eyes. "Are you having an affair with Lorelei?"
Brian crossed his fingers at the steering wheel and his toes at the accelerator.
"No," he said.
"No?" Leighanne repeated.
"No."