Welcome to the first edition of the Hamster Times. Every week, we take a humourous look at the news and report it, but mostly we make stuff up, just like quite a few real newspapers.

We will be continually improving the general look, but that'll take ages. Three people doing stuff during our lunch hour, that's us.

Please come again every Wednesday. Enjoy yourselves!

1. Editorial
   The editor speaks. And rambles, and dithers, and chats, and talks.
   

2. Brief News
   Some of the Brief newsworthy bits we have found from the past week. Please note, by the word brief, we do not mean undergarments. However, we do not exclude the right to include news about undergarments should any appear.
   

3. Crisis in our hospitals!
   Since it emerged that a surgeon had his daughter help in his work, we find that this is just one of the problems our hospitals are facing.
   

4. Statue for Mel!
   The Statue of William "Braveheart" Wallace unveiled, in, well Scotland of all places.
   

5. Life forms found on Mars!
   We find news of government cover-ups on the discovery of life on the planet Mars.
   

6. Irish election news.
   Is the Eurovision song contest taking over the isle?
   

7. Letters.
   Wit and wisdom from our various readers.
   

8. The Hamster Times PhotoStory
   Why, its a Neigh-Bores Photostory. What else is there to say ?
   

9. Sport
   Its the General sporting life, as according to the Hamster Times.
   

10. The backPages
    Well, what appears on the back pages, but the sport headlines. Our major story this week - well... England vs Moldova...