I need
help. This is probably a weird kind of question but..... I
want to be able to walk up and talk to a guy I don't know that well.
Can you help me with some way to become or just appear more outgoing?
Shy teen, (ML)
Dear Shy,
That's a very
difficult thing to do, I must admit, when you are shy because when you
aren't comfortable in a situation it often tends to show. There is
an approach that may work: start small. Maybe when you pass him in the
hallway at school smile. If you get a response you may stop and say “hi”
the next time you see him or make some small talk appropriate at the time.
Keep it light. Keep it short. Eventually you may find he'll speak to you
first. And the more comfortable you get with him the better you'll be able
to see if you actually enjoy being around each other. Of course, if you
really want to make a huge change in your character and become more outgoing
I think it would have to encompass your entire life, not just in talking
to boys. Being outgoing is a matter of confidence in yourself. It’s a matter
of not standing on the sidelines because you are afraid of doing or saying
something embarrassing. People that are outgoing take the risk. If you
are willing to take that chance then the next time you see that guy be
bold. Walk up to him, smile, and say a few things. It could fall
flat. It could work. It’s worth a try even. Of course, you could always
take the novel approach. Mess up your hair, wet your mascara so that it
runs, and button your shirt wrong, or turn it inside out or something.
Then rush up to him and say, "I'm sorry, I’m having one of those days…I’ve
lost every pencil and pen I had today…could you lend me one or maybe 3
or 4 as I’ll probably need that many today anyway.” If he sees through
you and laughs, he could be a keeper.