I think it was the meth that came between us I think this was why she shaved her head that time and why another later day I came home to an empty house why I became committed after that to sleeping with as many people as possible about whom I cared not at all and why my sinuses became battlegrounds my arms began to cramp when reaching for things I did not want and how my heart slowed down when I gave this up at last as there are never enough lines never a point that does not jab its way in never roses when roses are needed though sitting in a bar alone at 2 am someone always comes in and shoves some under your nose though I do know when this happens the solution is to buy one put it in your beer bottle carry it home after last call its head down hanging there from an unnoticed thorn
tiramisu light on the tongue and I think of you that red dress the thin strap falling candlelight and the last of the wine after clams linguine the tiramisu so sweet with a hint of bitter chocolate of espresso too rich so we split it the candle flickering moving shadows each waiting for the other to take the last bite
hear you in my sleep and the night sounds better though it is not you and I roll over and there is the comfort of a warm and familiar thigh but it is not you and your song plays through me like rain on the car roof as windshield diamonds sing to the steamed glass your breath in the night and the sound is here but it is not you and deeper into the dream you appear just out of reach and I run to you but I cannot close the distance like running in water your song like running water light through trees above a grassy bank in summer heat my clothing under my head your song will not leave me but I need the warmth of you the smell the taste of you here with me here inside I will always
another way of singing I have been here only days the lifespan of the tulips though absent a hard freeze their bulbs will bring them back again next spring of course we never know what will intervene I have sung quietly in a voice that does not echo from these soft walls your orgasms like peach blossoms falling
value not the summer boardwalk forest of unattainable young thighs but the hot night memory of slipping in sweat sliding off you laughing the one in the hammock out the 2nd floor window naked her head shaved laughing up the 30 thousand dollar sport utility vehicles nothing in comparison the cruises the single malts the thousand dollar suits the gold rolex nothing that one touch of her lips that was all there was recorded here forever the small hand tugging my beard back down your voice in morning darkness no celluloid princess no walking barbie no inflated temple love goddess no vestal version the one with the slender fingers that wrapped me in breath-faint touch the streetlamp light sliced apart by half-open blinds spread on the bread of you the best things are free whether you can get them or not
love & war she cuts my head out of the photographs she likes best with the small scissors she always reserved for trimming her hair my son collects them from the floor and the trash puts them away in a coffee can with his toy soldiers
Scratch one abattoir Bored, I sit on the dock capturing insects in a tin can, skate bugs off the water, pouring them on the rough planks. Out of their element, they move slowly, drunkenly. I coax the bugs to a space between boards, knitted by a large coarse spun web, occupied by two tiny white unmoving spiders. The trap is large, but poor, and the skate bugs fall through, hit the water to vanish to some safer section of their proper element. One wanders at last to the edge and beyond, drops and sticks struggling, and a huge grey spider races from somewhere below. Spider pounces, covering, squeezing; little legs hang out, trembling, curling, still. Ashore for dry leaves, I return to drop them into the web: I light one, and bring it all down in seconds. I'm no vegetarian, but nothing I do gives me that spider feeling, well not often, and Christ those little legs could have been anybody.