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***UPDATED
7/19/99...***
We speak to nothing. Some of us do it well.
My life has pointed me in a direction filled with passion for music
and a desire to weave that into the BDSM lifetsyle that encompasses
a third of My life for the past 13 years.
The art form capable of coming from the two, creates avenues that I have just barely touched in the past.
"I want you roughhouse baby/
I want this right in your ear/
you let me feel your danger/
I let you make this clear/
I want the touch of your charms/
the heat of your breath/
I want to say ALL those things/
better left unsaid"/
This page will attempt to create a guideline, a plan, as to how and WHY I feel this can be
achieved. Trial and error..taking the things I've learned and what I've created and marrying
them into a "movement".
"If you know who you are and it shows in your life.."
Are you typical?
There are lessons to be had from the intense displacement that comes from severe pain. Enlightenment
is found while enduring-but now, the reinversion of responsible Ownership makes the difference.
Endurance can also become a challenge of withstanding pleasure-which oddly, is often the greatest
fear of the masochist, and a disability she has learned to disguise in the language of the D/s soldier.
Finally she must learn to anticipate pleasure,and then at last, transmute her own expectation of
pleasure into the need to give her Owner pleasure. It is a series of quantum leaps, eons from the
typical submissive
Wanna play?
means: Want to lead you, to this void of reflection, where you are tangled in thorny torture, and made
to believe, if even temporarily, in a luxury: your uselessness and helplessness-when in reality the
power you contain is an object of pleasure to your Master.
Pleasure is pleasure to be shared, not some power trip for a plastic DOM/mes to elevate His ego
and show his stature.
It's wrong to give punishments in anger. In BDSM, they should be given from Someone who loves you,
and would stop when you told them to.
AND a Master should be autocratic, stern, demanding, but much of the time gentle in His demands, and
most importantly of all, retain true power by controling a desire.
Care about what you are doing.
Abuse is NOT what BDSM is...
"I'm a national outbreak/
A scandalous poet,with a gasoline habit for you/
I'll use and amuse,sometimes confuse/
and talk to you all night and day/
jokers and smokers and all other hopers/
bishops and bankrobbers play/
speak to me,talk to me, please don't ignore me/
it may never happen this way...again"
Lets get uncomfortable. Does the BDSM lifestyle draw P/people who are different, unique.
God..I hope so. If W/we weren't then the day would be gray and everything would taste like chicken.
It's a vanilla world after all. To think, for example, that there are human beings who LIVE to serve and
Others who Need to care for others...and it all smacks(sic) with the promise of something special.
"Take your body/take your soul/take your freedom/take control/give you pleasure/give you pain/
make you feel/alive again.
And the fakers..those who are in it for the sex alone, have no idea just
what they are missing. To break another..to strip their souls bare and bring them out is what is needed
and then..THEN the sex..that important echo..will scream an evil nasty that comes not from the mouth
but from the reptillian core..of the soul.
The credo begins...
"Tonight is the beginning of all nights,the
beginning of all things pleasureable, your at the doorway to where fantasy can become reality, where
truth will be known,all you have to do is beg".
I often wonder what the problem is...really..all you
have to do is ask. Have I earned that trust yet?
Bliss...let the diversity in which we dwell be reflected in the
music. A sounding if you will, for all those who wish not to judge
or be judged but simply to exist in the heavens of individualism.
Percieving as you wish. Wish the freedom to make up Y/your own mind.
Constructed on a driving texture that at times wraps its hands about the very center of what it means to be alive and in turn seeing the humor in itself by casting stones at what treasures W/we have all become. The very essence of that which strips us of our flesh may in turn stimulate the soul.
Out-stretched wide eyes glazed. This will rattle the realm that binds us all. See through mediocrity. Never be afraid to feel too much.
"I ride the painted whore/She gives good universal scream."
Discipline is an exacting art. Just like training a fine race horse or other show animal, you must keep up with a submissive's program. Any laxness on the trainer's part is directly reflected in the actions of the subject.
Being the true Dominant deals with drawing out one's innermost feelings and emotions and using that as a starting point to help a sub better deal with her wants and needs. The best DOM often means being half-psychologist and half-father. The fact that sexuality is involved is merely a reflection of life itself and the fact that we all need our deepest, darkest desires realized and fulfilled. W/we don't want to be empty.
"Sometimes when we walk/Sometimes when we talk/Even when you whisper out a moan/Even when we sleep/Often when you creep/Even when we fuck I feel alone."
...I realized the boundary I crossed when I habitually pulled her hair when I came,
and she enjoyed it. She soon found "guilty" pleasure of having gone through the whippings, being bound, scratched with thorns and waxed. The challenge of withstanding the pain, oddly the biggest fear of a masochist, also became the fear of withstanding pleasure. I learned...W/we learned... It was pure then.
No rulebook other than our own. And the silly little safe word(seagull) she had tattooed to her ankle. There was no turning back. Most people will think it exciting at worst and at best, exotic. This is a way of life. Imagine..the life Y/you live is exotic. How many 'nillas can say that.
"I do things wrong,of course/I think unlovely thoughts,of course/I hate sometimes/I resent sometimes/and perhaps act childish at times,of course/I'm thoroughly,charmingly human,but I know it."
I am an Equalitarian Dominant..therefore there is little in this type of involvement that has a downside. The concepts are grasped and made to happen too. This forms the longest lasting, most intimate relationships. Sensuosness is the rule and pain given is a form of stimuli.
As a Dominant in this arena, seduction is in the form of power. The sub seduces with her willingness to serve.
It seems easier to communicate My needs and have these needs met. It's work. But the labor has the deepest,most satisfying rewards. Bondage is used as an enhancement to submission. Pain-play used to emphasize the position the submissive is in."
"Back in the good old days/When dancing meant exploding/The idea was so simple/For a decent overloading."
There was one who remembered pain and love being the same. She wanted the same scars given to her by her ex, her first, opened again and again. To be reminded that one who loved her had tracked her too. No love in that. I wanted no part of the effect. Pain was pleasure. Contortions should be prompted by arousal. Never could I be party to this. Dismissed.
"I picked this pine stuck in My side/I've made My head and there I'll hide/My mouth a grin,My muscle taut/My mind is clear,devoid of thought/your mouth is red/the lies are real/and perfect as the love you steal/you picked this pine,stuck in your arm/and then you just ran out of charm."
Fondle the idea. Y/you know in Y/your heart what Y/you love and Y/you don't have to make Y/yourself feel,or lead others to believe that Y/you should be anything other than what Y/you are. Believe Me when I say that it wastes the time and emotion of T/those who may seek Y/your affection or support. Just realize that the issue is of too much importance to some P/people's lives for it to be reduced or appropriated, because the P/people who want it have no choice but to push for it, without having to convince or prove it to T/themselves or others.
"The more I see, the more I do/The more I spit, the more I chew/The more you suck, the more I have to swallow/And when I see the things you do/the more I want the most of you/the more I whip, the more you'll have to swallow."
*and for Me..a memory...
I stared upon My swollen glans/and knew right then what I had planned/I dreamt about her supple chest/and chewing on a nippled breast/My cock in hand,My fist a cunt/I did not care who saw this stunt/she gave to Me all that she was/the pain she felt at every shove/of leathered fake and wooden hand/upon her ass she could withstand/the whip she took and every lash/and swollen still her hungry gash/suspended then above the ground/I stroked and thought of cracking sounds/Her privacy I did display/the pouty mouth at every flay/nothing ventured ever gained/she gave me all, never waned/yes..I came ..and yes..I went/and further still I am not spent/I tasted Me and smiled wide/is this what she wished for inside/I thought of clit and tasted love/her inner walls My velvet glove/"the chains", she said, "the pounding bar"/"I beg you then, take Me that far"/I spread her out and pounded in/and kneaded back..and yes..I grinned/I startled Me, a selfish whore/I did not care, I wanted more/I thought of lust, of curvy leg/bottom pink and how she begged/bit her shoulder, pulled her hair/whispered release in her ear/I thought of whips, lips to feed/faster now, spilling seed/and all that's left lay on Me now/some on My chest, some by My brow/swiping it and tasting Me/and holding out My hand to see/I broke her will and built her right/and yet, I stroke alone this night.*
Talk about the exchange of Power. There is one. No absolute on Top or bottom. The words set between the T/two before the start..the guidelines..the rules, better, show this fact to be true. The purity of the relationship is in the following of these. Does that take away spontaneity in play, does it force one scene always.
Does sex always have to end in the same position. Be ridiculous in that belief...settle for that explanation. As much as I'd like to be able to cum in colours and be able to describe the perfect orgasm in words, nothing will make you feel it...not even Me.*
"What you do to me/leaves puddles at my feet/won't it make me ill/the way you make me feel/can't remember when/my senses were so bent/tell me you're impressed/with my obsessiveness/won't you let me kiss/your starving, sweet abyss/you really have a flair/to suffocate me there."
The art is in the presentation. Nowhere will this be found more often than in the pure BDSM relationship. No scene necessary. What can be more intimate then flesh on flesh? More giving then the total submission of one human being to Another? Where will you find the grey areas so well defined? To see through the O/our eyes...
"Caressing bent up again/with sheaths and pills invading all those stills/In a hovel of a bed/I will scream in vain,please again/Leave you with some pain/I came upon your room and it stuck in my head/We leapt into bed degrading even lice/I took delight in taking down/All your shielded pride/until exposed your darker side/puckering up and down some avenue of sin/and you begging me to begin"
Is this what Y/you really want? Is the extremism right for Y/you. This is not something Y/you can go into half-heartedly. Y/you must throw your all into it. No fraction of Y/your soul can be anywhere else, for the purity. For the reason that this lifestyle is so much cleaner than the norm. And when Y/you come home...Y/you will never, ever turn back....
So at last the time has arrived, and let it be said that some of Y/you were caught red-handed, throwing caution to the wind. But enough of that-this thriller is to be exposed to an overfed but undernourished audience-who's minds are anything but hidden. But worry not-W/we're all friends here and there is little reason to hide away.
It's this journey that brought Y/you to this very point. W/we are all of U/us in a garden, not unlike eden, except for the weeds. Do Y/you see them? They feed on U/us,like some vanilla parasite...staring and pointing at what they cannot understand. Which is how people can be...they JUDGE what they cannot know...they cannot accept what's different...and I don't care.
But the ones' that rub Me raw, are the poseurs..the fakers..the PLAYERS..who shit on this most important thing. Those are the one's that prey on the N/new. W/we look interesting so why not live through us. You know..if Y/you want this so bad..if THIS is what Y/you are...hidden desires and all...don't deny Y/yourselves. This is the missing piece in the jigsaw reality...
"Stop embracing all yesterdays for in the end creatures of habit dwell there/When you turn around to face your fate all those regrets block the path before you/weighed down by your own neglect and you'll drown in your own evil/It doesn't mean you'll stay the same/You cannot force the change/Stop labouring for a single goal you can't depend on what the future holds for you/Not physically where you are on your journey/It's only what you make of it/The fruits of emphasis on tomorrow/Yield a life filled with much sorrow/It can never be the same/You must embrace the change
.....If you seek the wild horses,bound for uncharted courses/You would never grab the reins,for a chance to learn from your mistakes".
I thought about walking away from this. Just taking it down. But I didn't create this for A/any but Me. If anything touches others,I bow for My exhibition. V-a mysterious woman who promised to read the secrets of My desires. A training school of pleasure who kneeled automatic and lived in My shadow. she came blocked and wanting.
I gave her the persuasion to be the person she always wanted to be. It was good honest pornography and she balanced better than any on the sling. But what inspired Me sometimes made Me lonely.*
"and to her own reflection/twas as if her pallor gleamed/like an angelis warmed by candles/where erotic stains had cleaved/so My demons dragged this libertine/lusts screaming for release/upon her flesh My staff preened/as canvas for caprice.*"
...to be fully human and fully moral, we must be able to dream, strive, explore, experiment, think, travel, believe, speak, risk, fail, succeed, make choices, accept responsibility and grow. Always to grow.Y/you dream of intimacy, of sex, of an abundance of friends and flirtations and consensual conquest, of following your desires and seeing where they take Y/you...so are Y/you happy?..fulfilled?..is this what Y/you were waiting for?
My evil deed for the day was to grin wickedly while licking the oft-pushed envelope. Am I satisfied? W/we are sluts all who believe that pleasure is good for you. This love is a fundamental force for good. An activity with the potential to strengthen intimate bonds,enhance lives and even create spiritual
awareness....*GRIN*..any sexual pathway, consciously chosen and mindfully followed,can be a positive, creative force in the lives of individuals...
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