Assuming I do exist, here are some more reasonable answers to the question:
I am a 39 year old scientist living in Ipswich, UK. Somewhere back in the mists of time, I graduated from Oriel College, Oxford with an honours degree in physics, and went on to do a doctorate there too. I'm a member of the Institute of Physics. My interests include steam railways, both model and real; model aircraft - I'm assembling a collection of models of all types of shipborne aircraft of World War 2; science fiction and fantasy, particularly Terry Pratchett; rock music - my favourite bands are Rush and Wishbone Ash; and doing strange and amusing things to do with Monty Python's Flying Circus on the Internet.
I'm married to Katie, who is, among other things, an former antenatal teacher with the National Childbirth Trust. We have four children, Eleanor (11), Alex (9), Maia (6) and Jonathan (10 months at time of writing). My son, Alex, is autistic. Since well before his diagnosis in 1993, understanding and coping with autism has been a major factor in all our lives. If you are interested in finding out more about this complex and still incompletely understood disorder, information is available from the National Autistic Society, or the Center for the Study of Autism.