March of the Living 1999 Diary

April 18, 3:20 PM (Israel time)

Please tell me this isn’t happening to me. No wait. I’ll tell you what’s going on, then I’ll tell you what’s happening to me.

I meant to write on the plane here, but I was just too tired. I tried to get some semblance of sleep, but it didn’t work very well.

All the time on the plane I was thinking somewhat negatively. I know that I don’t get along that well with other girls. I know. The thing is, in Poland we were all shocked and sad. We banded together. You could go up to anyone and get a hug. Now that things are more normal, everyone will be forming cliques. They already have, and I’m in a guy clique. I don’t mind that, but it makes things harder for me. I was also thinking of myself as an outsider, almost. I’m going to a place for the first time that almost everyone has been before, and I don’ know the most basic things that everyone takes for granted, and I have no one to ask.

Oh, another thing (just to interrupt myself), I haven’t slept in 29 hours.

So we got to Israel, and I managed to keep my eyes open for the landing, barely. Everyone also seemed so excited, but to tell you the truth, I just didn’t feel it. It was just another place.

As soon as we got through the (very) long lines at customs, we went on the bus to Burma road. There we had breakfast, if you can call it that because it wasn’t very good at all.

Then we went on a 2 hour hike. Normally I really would have enjoyed it, even though it was a hard hike. But the thing is, I hadn’t gone to the washroom in 12, maybe 13 hours, and I really had to go. I couldn’t think of much else.

After hiking, we went to a mal for lunch. We each got 25 shekels (about $6 US). That was okay. I went with Ari and Jacob.

Then we planted trees. No, wait. First we went to a lookout of Jerusalem, which was pretty but I didn’t really enjoy it. Then we planted trees. That was fun.

And then we came here. We’re at the Shalom Hotel, where we’ll be 4 of the 5 nights we’re together. I had really wanted to room with Natalie again. She’s really nice. Instead, I’m with Amy and Sarah. Great. The two girls on this trip I know I don’t like, and I get stuck rooming with them. I’m going to be afraid to make a move this entire week in the room, and I doubt I’ll get any sleep. They’re up on the beach tanning now.

Which brings me to another thing: I don’t have the right converter for my razor in Israel. My legs are all hairy and I can’t wear shorts. Damn it! I didn’t think of bringing a normal razor, I thought this one would work!

Why do I get the feeling this week is going to be worse than the last? At least then, I was part of the group. Now I’m an outsider again. Will I ever get used to the feeling?

Amy and Sarah have the key, so I don’t want to leave the room. Damn!

Later,
Julie