Heard!

Source: Laura Isee5stars@aol.com 
Well, I just spent the last 3 1/2 hours driving back to Atlanta from the 
Charlotte BSB concert....chuckling to myself every mile! Tonight I witnessed 
what was quite possibly the funniest event in the history of live music, 
courtesy of the adorable Mr. Kevin Richardson. I will submit a full concert 
review separately, but I want to share this with you while the whole episode is 
fresh in my mind! 

Before "Don't Want You Back" the crew comes out and sticks five freestanding 
ladders into the stage. They are placed around the stage, and each Boy climbs 
up on his and does little stunts as he sings. Kevin was especially daring, 
hanging upside down and generally being very courageous. 

They were wearing these oversized warm-up pants to allow for movement. Instead 
of a seam on the outside of each leg, it looked like they had a zipper reaching 
from the waistband to just above the ankle. 

As Kevin came down from his ladder at the conclusion of the song it became 
apparent to him and everyone on our side of the stadium that he had busted his 
zippers. I mean wide open!!! Kevin was obviously distressed, because they were 
about to start "The Perfect Fan," and five mother/daughter pairs were being 
escorted onto the stage. To make matters worse, it is his job to intro the song 
and welcome everyone on stage, which he was valiantly trying to do as the 
spotlight turned on him in his full semi-naked glory! 

By this time a costume person had rushed out on stage and was fumbling with his 
pants. Those big britches were just flapping in the wind. Sweet Kevin kept 
repeating, "I don't mean to expose myself, but my drawers are coming apart!" He 
finally waved her away in frustration, and just tried to roll the waistband 
into his underwear. 

You know if this had happened to A. J. he would have just ripped off his pants 
and waved his bottom at the audience, but Kevin really looked embarrassed. I 
think he was honestly concerned that some of us would be upset at what our 
daughters were seeing. Of course, you and I both know there wasn't a female 
from age 5 to 50 who wasn't wishing that the thread holding him together would 
break. There was so much praying going on you would have thought it was Sunday 
morning. 

Anyway, for Kevin the show must go on, so he went and sat with his 
mother/daughter pair on these little stairs so that they could start "The 
Perfect Fan." As he sat there clutching his "drawers" he probably thought 
things couldn't get worse. Wrong! About halfway through the song each Boy is 
supposed to take the daughter by the hand and walk her 360 degrees around the 
stage. This proved particularly challenging for Kevin!! He needed one hand to 
hold his mic, one hand to hold up his pants and one to lead the daughter. Not 
only that, but as he paraded around the stage everyone became aware of his 
dilemma! I watched as he walked, and you could see his left hand constantly 
jump from his pants to the girl, while he sang into the mic in his right. He 
kept this up all the way around. But darn it, Kevin was going to give this 
little girl her moment. I mean, as we sat there watching this whole thing 
unfold, we couldn't help but love him! He was not going to let any of us down 
by running off stage, even for a moment. And yes....it does get worse. 

When they finally got back to where they started each daughter rejoined her 
mother, who was still sitting on the stairs. Each Boy was supposed to kneel in 
front of his pair, back to the audience, and finish the song. You could hear 
the quick intake of breath from everyone on our side of the Coliseum. "What 
will our hero do????" 

Well, by God, if kneeling is required then kneel you must! At least that seemed 
to be Kevin's reasoning. All of our prayers were answered at that moment. As 
Kevin Richardson knelt down to sing, that little thread holding everything 
together finally gave way! PLOP! The entire back half of Kevin's britches fell 
to the floor, stretched out like a shadow behind him! 

You have never seen a happier crowd in your life! I mean, this was truly a 
thing of beauty! I was laughing so hard tears were streaming down my face, but 
I could just make out Kevin grabbing what now were swatches of fabric and 
racing off stage. I wish I could tell you that Kevin was "going commando," but 
he had this tight pair of white spandex bicycle shorts on under his outfit. The 
good news is they were very short, very tight, and very sheer! The bad news is 
that I bet this will never happen again at any concert. Charlotte will be the 
only city to see the almost-full Monty. I am sure Kevin boarded the bus with a 
needle and thread, and sewed those "drawers" shut for good! That, and called 
Sears to order long johns to wear under all of his costumes! 

I think my daughter summed it up for all of us when she turned to me with wide 
eyes and an even wider grin and said, "WOW! I sure am glad we sat on THIS 
SIDE!" 

(P.S. On a scale of 1 to 10, Kevin's booty gets a 20!) 

FROM LAURA IN ATLANTA, GA 

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