RE: SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING




In order to assure the highest levels of quality work and
productivity from employees, it will be our policy to keep
all employees well trained through our SPECIAL HIGH
INTENSITY TRAINING (S.H.I.T.).  We are trying to give
employees more S.H.I.T. than anyone else. If you feel that
you do not receive your share of S.H.I.T. on the job, please
see your manager.  You will be immediately placed at the top
of the S.H.I.T. list, and our managers are especially skilled
at seeing that you get all the S.H.I.T. you can handle.
                  
Employees who don't take S.H.I.T. seriously will be placed in 
DEPARTMENTAL EMPLOYEE EVALUATION PROGRAMS (D.E.E.P.S.H.I.T.). 
Those who fail to take D.E.E.P.S.H.I.T. seriously will have to go
to EMPLOYEE  ATTITUDE TRAINING (E.A.T.S.H.I.T.).  Since our
managers took S.H.I.T.  before they were promoted, they won't have
to do S.H.I.T. anymore, and  are full of S.H.I.T. already.

If you are full of S.H.I.T. you may be interested in a job training
others.  We can add your name to our BASIC UNDERSTANDING LECTURE
LIST (B.U.L.L.S.H.I.T.).  Those who are full of B.U.L.L.S.H.I.T.
will get the S.H.I.T. jobs, and can apply for promotion to the
DIRECTOR OF INTENSITY TRAINING PROGRAMMING (D.I.P.S.H.I.T.).

If you have any further questions, please direct them to our HEAD
OF  TRAINING, SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (H.O.T.S.H.I.T.).     

Thank you,
             BOSS IN GENERAL
             SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING
             (B.I.G.S.H.I.T.)