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Real Fart Stories Page

This is the page where all the best farting stories are posted. If you have any which you think should be here, mail me the story.

Mail me your fart stories

I was on holiday last year with my girlfriend in Spain, and during those two weeks I had the best farts of my life! I don't really know what it was, maybe it was the food or maybe the drink, but they were the biggest, longest, loudest farts I've ever had in my life. Each day when we would go down to the beach I would take great pleasure in forcing them out as hard as I could, which meant that anyone in a 500 yard radius could hear them! Seeing as I was farting about once every ten minutes the looks that was getting from the surrounding people were memorable to say the least! (Sam)
When people write about farting it always reminds me of the time I had the most stinky farts in the world. I normally do get some pretty stinky farts but these were truly terrible, you could tell that by the fact that even I did not want a whiff of them! There were four of us in a car at the time, and boy were the other passengers suffering! Each time I let a silent guff of wind pass, I'd immediately put my fingers on the power window override button, therefore forcing my fellow passengers to sample my terrible gas. May I be forgiven. (Jase)
Last week when my girlfriend was asleep I needed to fart, so I pulled down my pants and put my butt about a micron away from her nose. Then I let rip BBBRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRT! The real irony of this story was that she didn't even stir or wake up. Checking she wasn't dead, I rolled over, promising never again to wast my farts on the likes of her
Life is a thing of two halves, one good, one bad. The bad is when you're at an important function or in the boss' office, and you have to keep your farts in, for what seems like forever. The good part is when you get out of that situation and can have 15 minutes of pure farting pleasure when you do noting but fart. Carry on farting... (Peter)
Once I was walking home from college and I felt the enormous urge to fart, but couldn't let it go as I was in a crowded area, so I decided to let it out in stages, one little pop for each step. After 500 yards and 20 pops, certainly felt satisfied. (Anon)
I was sitting in my room alone once when I felt a huge fart coming, and so tried to make the most of it my blasting it out with my ass in the air. It was a truly huge and unbeleivably loud fart, and I felt duly proud. About 5 secounds later my Mom came rushing in looking concerned and asked if I was O.K. She'd rushed in because she'd heard a loud bang and thought I'd fallen over....Of course I had to confess! (Simon)


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