I think we all know who I am talking about when I mention players. If you are a woman then chances are you have been burned by one, are infautated with one or aren't reading this because you are too busy having sex with one. Guys who are reading this aren't players because A: they are on the internet and B: would be having sex right now. But in case there is anyone out there that doesn't know the person I am talking about, I'll go ahead and define the term. I am talking aobut those guys who act like a big sweety while having sex with as many women as humanly possible. This is a clunky definiton so allow me to further narrow the idea here. It is the abusive type of guy who used a woman for sex, money, cable...whatever and acts deep and tells them a the things they want to hear, but then only shows up when they want something, screws around(often times a lot, and when caught screwing around, manages to make it the woman's fault. I hate these guys. Let me tell you why.
First of all, I am generally what is considered a 'nice guy.'This isn't to say that I am an angel by any means. I have done some pretty shitty things in relationships and I regret them, but they don't define me. They were mistakes and missteps, NOT my plans for the weekend. I think most people are like that. They are basically good, but they fuck up occasionally. No one is perfect. SO that being established, that I am a nice guy, it also must follow that I do very badly with women. Apparently nice guys aren't exciting enough more a lot of women. You hardly ever see women dating men who are responsible, agreeable nad have their shit together. No you see them with gansta g's or big leather clad punks with a monosalbic vocabulariy that consists mostly of the the words 'blow job' and a lot of burning their girl with cigarettes. I have never understood this. Often times women complain about the men they are with, about how they KNOW they should get out of the relationship, but when it comes time for them to go the abuser becomes big Mr Sweety, pulling out philosophy, psychology and any other kind of 'ology' to get the woman to stay. and they just about always do. I really believe that I could be the ugliest guy in the world and get a supermodel if I walked up to her and punched her right in the face and called her a slut. She'd be mine forever. Or at least that is how it seems out there. You look at these guys with these beautiful women and they treat them badly like property and yet the women stay. It upsets me to no end.
The abuse brings me to my next point. If a guy like me is lucky enough to find a woman who will date him, the woman has had something go on previously that adversly affects the relationship. Some bastard ex boyfriend screwed with their head so much that there is nothign that the new guy can do. No matter how hard he tries, he can't compete. The bitch is that often he will never be loved as much as that first guy yet at the same time he will get all of the negative feelings and mistrust the first one worked so hard for. This has happened to me so many times I trust it more than Greenwich Mean Time. It is insane!! The only way to avoid this past history is to start dating 6th graders, but that is illegal and just plain wrong.
Now the final problem, and this is a big one, is that nice guys couldn't date women anyway because the players have them all. Now I am not saying that women are going out with players at a one to one ratio. No, no, each player has six or seven women tied up and despite the fact that they often KNOW the guy has all of these other girlfriends, they women all seem to want to stay faithful to him. What the hell is that???? I don't get that at all, but I don't get these guys more. Here is this perfect woman. She is amazing, everything that a person would want and the player gets her. Are they happy? Do they thank God above that they were this fortunate? No not these guys. They say "wow, this sure is a perfect woman. I am really...oh shit there are other girls out there that might go out with someone else and have a meaningful relationship with them...I had better just go out with them too." SO one guy gets like six or seven women and I get a computer printout of Patricia Ford and my right hand. It really doesn't even out.
I tell you all I want is someone to be happy with. I just want to love and be loved and I will b done. Content. One person can do that. Not five or six or seven. One. That is all I need. But it seems like nothing short of a hydralic lift job on my car, sagging tagger jeans and a propensity for whacking women with sticks is going to get that for me. Oh well. No one ever said life was fair.
If you or any one you know is a player or has been hopelessly in love with a player please email the playerhelp line, email address bellow. If you don't help at Playerhelp, plese get help somewhere.
© 1997 bodhili@hotmail.com
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