A patrol car has been following this vehicle for about 30 mins now
When they decided to pull over.
The officer steps out and walks up to the driver's window.
"Good afternoon sir",
"Good afternoon,any problem ? "
No sir,my partner and I have been following and observeing you for an hour now.We ascertained that you have not commited one single traffic violation,you have not gone over the speed limit by even 1Mph,you were courteous towards the fellow drivers on the road .Therefore , as a part of our New"solid driving awarness program",I would like to present you with this cheque for $30,000,00".
The driver lets out a big sign of relief,"Oh Good,now I can finally pay to get my driver's license.(Ooops !)"
Awkard silence from the officer.Then the wife sitting in the passenger seat goes,"Don't listen to him,Officer,he always talk nonsense when he has been drinking .
Grandma who's a little hard of hearing adds from the backseat,"Aye,aye.aye,didn't I tell you not to go in a stolen car ?"
at this time,the trunk pops open and head peeks out ,"Are we over the border yet ?
A priest is called away for an emergency.Not wanting to leave the Confessional unmanned, he call a rabbi friend and ask him to cover for him. The rabbi tells him that he wouldn't know what to say.
A few minutes later,another woman enters.She says ,"Oh father ,please forgive me for I ahve sin."
The rabbi ask ," what did u do ? "
The woman says,"I have committed Adultery."
Rabbi :"How many times ."
Woman:" just once ."
Rabbi :"Go n' do it two more times.We have Special Offer this week ,Three for $5.00."