There was this little boy who woke up 3 nights in a row to hear his parents making noises from their bedroom. On the 3rd morning, the little boy finally askes his mom, "Mom, for the last 3 night I waked up during the night, and I hear you and daddy making noises from your room. Why?" Surprised by the question the mom replies, "Well... I am jumping up and down on him because he is so fat, that it makes him feel thin." Then the boy said, "That won't work mom!" The mom asks, "Why?" The boy then says, "Because after you leave for work every morning, the lady from next door comes by and pumps dad right back up!"

A mom and dad were worried about their son not wanting to learn math at the school he was in, so they decided to send him to a Catholic school. After the first day of school, their son comes racing into the house, goes straight into his bedroom and slams the door shut. Mom and dad are a little worried about this and go to his bedroom to see if he is okay. Then they find him sitting at his desk doing his homework. The boy keeps doing that for the rest of the year. At the end of the year the son brings home his report card and gives it to his mom and dad. Looking at it they see under math an A+. Mom and dad are very happy and ask the son what changed your mind about learning math? The son looked at mom and dad and said, "Well, on the first day when I walked into the classroom, I saw a guy nailed to the plus sign at the back of the room behind the teacher's desk and I knew they ment business."

This useful tool, commonly found in the range of 7 inches long, the functioning of which is enjoyed by members of both sexes, is usually found hung, dangling loosely, ready for instant action.  It boasts of a clump of little hairy things at one end and a small hole at the other. In use, it is inserted, almost always willingly, sometimes slowly, sometimes quickly, into a warm, fleshy, moist opening where it is thrust in and drawn out again many times in succession, often quickly and accompanied by squirming bodily movements.  Anyone found listenining will most surely recognize the rhythmic, pulsing sounds resulting from the well lubricated movements.  When finally withdrawn, it leaves behind a juicy, frothy, white substance, some of which will need cleaning from the outer surfaces of the opening and some from its long glistening shaft.  After everything is done and the flowing and cleansing liquids have ceased emanating, it is returned to its freely hanging state of rest, ready for yet another bit of action, hopefully reaching its bristling climax twice or three times a day, but often much less.  As you have already no doubt guessed, the answer to this riddle is none other than your very own toothbrush.