Scroll down past the image for info about the toys pictured.



Toys pictured above:

• Gooey Louie game
  This is a digusting "childrens" game where you pick boogers out of Louie's nose. There is one booger that is rigged to make his brain fly out of his head. The person who picks this booger loses. (charming huh?) I bought this little gem at Wal-Mart.
  
  
• Earth Worm Jim and vehicle
  There's a great comic book/cartoon/video game called Earth Worm Jim. It's too strange to describe, but I promise... if you every see it, you will die laughing. This toy is an action figure of Jim and his bike. Jim has a button on his back, and if you push it his little wormy head flies out of his muscular human body. I bought this at a store in New Hope, PA. It's a great place to shop for kitch.
  
  
• Burger King toy - bat from Anastasia movie
  A talking version of the cute little bat from the animated movie Anastasia. Poke his little belly, and he says random quotes from the movie. My friend Mark got this for me.
  
  
• Matchbox Rino-rod
  Exactly what it sounds like... a matchbox car shaped like a rino. There's a coffee bar on South st in Philadelphia called RINO CAFE. One of the employees said that "Never in a million years would I get it from them". Since that sounded like a challenge to me, I had some girl I know go in and sweet talk the guy until he gave it to her. I hope you see this you stuck up coffee shop snob! = Þ
  
  
• black rubber spider
  Sitting on the rino-rod is a black rubber spider. It doesn't do anything special, it just sits there and looks like a spider. Not very neat is it?
  
  
• plush octopus
  This was a souvanier from the time my girlfriend & I went to the New Jersey state aquarium. It's a little on the silly side, but I find "octopi" to be rather amusing, so I got it.
  
  
• Goody Vault
  Under the octopus is my GOODY VAULT. It's a little plastic safe that comes with EXTREAMLY cheap toys inside. (that's where the black rubber spider came from) It has a real combination, and can be used as a bank. I wouldn't put anything too valuable in it, because (A) you can see right through it and (B) because it's plastic for God's sake !!! Doesn't take a criminal master mind to crack a plastic safe. The girl who swindled the Rhino-Rod for me also got me this.
  
  
• GOOEY LOUIE squirt gun
  Looks just like the game, and is about as offensive too. Fill it with liquid, (preferably BOOGER GREEN colored liquid) and push on his brain to make the liquid shoot out of his nose. (again... charming huh?) This came with the game.
  
  
• Beanie Baby candy - Fletcher the penguin
  This little guy may seem cute, but if it was just cute I wouldn't have it. Rip his little back open to find his tasty candy guts inside. (not so cute now is it?) After eating all the candy I was left with a limp unstuffed penguin, so I stole the little talking box out of my friend's dog's toy that when pushed says, "I looooove chocolate." Now my little penguin talks, and it drives the dog crazy too. I would feel bad, but I'm a cat lover. This dog has had more than his fair share of cats for dinner, so he must pay !!! I bought this in Wawa. For those of you who don't live in the Philly area, Wawa is like 7-11, but a million times better.
  
  
• another Burger King toy - same bat differnt toy
  This is the same bat from the Anastasia anamated movie, but this one is different. It is much smaller and holding an eye ball. When you pull the eye ball it slowly rolls back to him, as he wiggles around. Pretty spiffy huh? Another gift from the Rhino-Rod girl.
  
  
• nifty eye balls
  These neat little eye balls always look up. They are floating in liquid, so the color of the eye is always at the top no matter which way you turn it. It's pretty cool, and my cats love smacking them around the house. A few years after I got them, they were recalled. As it turns out, the liquid they have in them is kerosene which is highly flamable.... nice kids toy eh? I forget where I got them.
  
  
• NUNZILLA !!!
  A wind up toy that looks like a Nun. When you wind her up she walks and shoots sparks out of her mouth like the giant fire breathing lizard... Godzilla. This toy is sure to piss off any die hard catholic. I got this at a store on South st. called "A Perfect Word".
  
  
• eye ball head action figure
  I have no idea who this guy is or what he's from. I saw it at (all together now) the FLEA MARKET, and I just had to have it because it was so weird. It has a normal body, but it's head is just an eye ball. How does he eat, smell, hear and breathe ??? I guess since I have no clue who it is I'll never know. There's a little dial on his back that makes his head or eye, what ever you want to call it, move from side to side.
  
  
• Crypt Keeper action figure
  From the hit HBO show, Tales from the crypt, comes this decayed story teller in his tux. He has a little lever on his back to make his head turn and arms go up & down. Yet another flea market score.
  
  
• another Earth Worm Jim action figure
  Pretty much the same as the other, but this one is BATTLE DAMAGE JIM. In other words, this one had his @ss kicked. He also has a button on his back, but instead of his head shooting out his chest does. I've never heard of some one's chest falling off from being beat too much, but then again I never heard of a worm with a chest either. Again... flea market. They must love seeing me drive up every week.
  
  
• choo choo train whistle
  It's kind of silly. I'm not even sure where I got it from. If you blow in the back, it makes a very loud anoying train whistle sound. (loud and anoying is fun)
  
  
• Earth Worm Jim's trusty side kick
  There are two in the picture. One for each Jim action figure I have. They are called snots, but don't look like boogers. (these have faces) They came with the Earth Worm Jim figures.
  
  
• plastic dice
  Big, blue, plastic dice. Another cheap toy from the GOODY VAULT. They don't even roll well.
  
  
• glow in the dark kangaroo
  You can barely see it because it's so small. It's standing on the stupid blue dice. Everything about this toy is weird. (A) why is it so small? (B) why does a kangaroo glow in the dark? (C) I found it on the counter in a bar. why would something like that be in a bar? (D) why was I even in the bar... I don't drink. There's no reason for me to be sitting at a bar if I don't drink. It was fate... me and this little kangaroo were meant to be together.
  
  
• green rubber octopus
  One more doozy of a toy from the GOODY VAULT. Much like the balck rubber spider, it just sits there looking like a green rubber octopus.
  
  
• squish face
  It's just a yucky toy... I love it. It's a monsterous face covered by a thin rubber film. When you squish it, blood squirts out of it's mouth and is caught by the thin rubber film around it. I guess its kinda like a condom. (told you it was yucky) Another gem from "A Perfect Word" on South st. in Philly.
  
  
• McDonald's toy - Baloo from the Jungle Book
  Pop the top of his head open, and he makes a neat hiding place for anything small enough to fit in there. I got this at a McDonalds in New York city (yes, I got a happy meal) when I was dropping my brother off at the airport for his trip to Japan.
  
  
• wind up lizard
  This might be a McDonald's toy also, but I'm not sure. It was given to me by another friend (thanks Mark) Wind it up and it does back flips.

---

This page hosted by Get your own Free Home Page