Those Who Are In Prison
by Claudina (February 6, 2001)

As the darkness surrounds me and I am alone, I cry. My soul is in despair, the walls around me are closing in. There are people all around me, but, they don’t know that I am in prison, bound by the fears that grip my innermost being. My stomach tightens. My mouth grows dry. If I cry out, will they hear me? Will they understand that I am trapped within myself, that I long for freedom from the nightmares that haunt my imagination? Who has placed me in this horrible place? Who has sentenced me to die, alone and afraid?
It was me. I have brought this punishment upon myself. I have looked deep inside my soul and found no good thing there, and for that, I have condemned myself into isolation. I have put chains on my soul, so that it cannot emerge into the public domains of mankind. How can I allow my soul to be revealed? All that is there is vulnerable and subject to pain. It in my best interest that I have created for myself this prison.
I will lift up my head and face the world with a smile. I will show them that I am happy
and free. I am strong. I can take my lumps with the best of them and never let my step
falter, they will not see me sweat. And I will call this prison

Let’s look at "the fear of death" for a moment. How deep does this fear run? There is the natural death of the physical body that is familiar to all of us, but what about other deaths? The death of a relationship? The death of a dream or vision? The death of a friendship? It is a common saying "All good things must end". We have learned to accept this saying as fact, but is it the way that God intended for our lives to be? I think not.

Jesus conquered death by His death. His physical death took the place of all our deaths and the "gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord" (Romans 6:23) So then, why do we still hide behind the walls we have built inside our souls?

Now let’s turn the coin around. Is the person sitting next to you in his/her own prison? Have they built the same walls that you have built? If so, did they build their walls for the same reasons? And what, if anything, should you do about it?

**"For decades now, we Christians have surrendered our rights to the role as healers of soul-disease. We have delegated that responsibility to professional psychotherapists, psychologists, and counselors - mostly non-Christians - because "we might say the wrong thing." And yet, helping our fellow travelers over the rough spots on the way is one of our God-ordained tasks and joys.

"**There is a power within the life of every Christian waiting to be released - a power that can lead to further and deeper change, a power that can help someone else join more intimately to the heart of Christ, the power to heal soul wounds. That power is released by connecting with the hearts and souls of other people and allowing God’s grace to flow freely through us to them.

"**Why are we afraid of connecting with others? And what has prevented us from achieving the thrill of intimacy with friends and family that God wants us to have? How do we accomplish the fusion of souls that heals us from soul-disease and sets us free to be ourselves - to know others as we really want to be known?

"**The usual pattern for most of us in dealing with a hurting friend is to retreat, reprove, or refer. Like Israelites avoiding a leper, most of us want to establish a safe distance between us and the emotionally troubled. We often do so by reciting Christian phrases that arouse no passion in us but are supposed to do powerful things for them. "God is at work even in the darkest of times." or "Where has the word ministered to you recently?" or "You really have no reason to be so down. You’re too hard on yourself. You have a lot going for you." or "Maybe you should talk to someone. Have you considered counseling?" The desired effect is to free us from such confusing conversations with 'sick' people so that we can move on to hang around happier folks."

These are normal responses to those around us but, are they the right responses? The fact is that not many people powerfully connect with others, whether through prayer, embrace, or conversation. Connection could be the norm - instead it’s the exception. We must find the courage to face our terrifying longing to connect. We desperately need community. We need to be heard and we need to listen to others as they need to be heard.

The best part of each of us lies deep within the walls of our souls. We protect what we hold dearest and closest to us in an effort to evade the inevitable pain of opening up to someone just to have them smile sweetly and turn away carrying with them a secret part of us.

We are created to take on the likeness of Christ, to love and minister to those around us. Never, should a person need to be concerned about our intentions concerning their secrets. In John 13:34-35, we find Jesus saying, "Love one another; as I have loved you,
that ye also love one another. By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples." We never want to fall into the category of the "ones on the left" as described in Matthew 25:40-46

Isaiah 42:6-8

• 6. I the Lord have called thee in righteousness, and will hold thine hand, and will keep thee, and give thee for a covenant of the people, for a light of the Gentiles;
  
• 7. To open the blind eyes, to bring out the prisoners from the prison, and them that sit in darkness out of the prison house.
  
• 8. I am the Lord: that is my name: and my glory will I not give to another, neither my praise to graven images.

John 8:36 "If the Son therefore shall make you free, ye shall be free indeed." If we are made "free indeed" are we not then free to be ourselves even in the presence of others? Are we free to tear down the walls that we have built inside our hearts? Will He truly protect us from the devastation that will surely follow when we expose what really lies deep within us, the vulnerable, innermost parts? Are we free to deeply love and to be loved deeply. Is it really "Christ in us that is our hope of glory"?

We look inside to see 'who we really are' and then because of the many "fears" of death, we struggle, we cry out in silence into the surrounding darkness, and hope that no one hears us. Paul writes about his effort to deal with issues of the person he was on the inside. Paul did manage to reveal his 'real' person to all of us in his writings but, this passage reveals that it wasn't a 'walk in the park' for him either.
To paraphrase Romans 7:13-25
The very best thing in me is the 'Law of God' and in His Law I find life, full and free. But, in His Law I find death. Although I desperately long to be good and acceptable in His eyes, I find, that because I am flesh, descended from the fall of Adam, I have NO GOOD THING IN ME except the "Law of God'. Oh, wretched man that I am. My soul longs to serve and obey every 'word' of God yet, I just can't seem to get things completely right because my sinful nature is to do what pleases me and no other. My religious up-bringing, my perceptions and strongholds war against the very truths of God, who is just and holy and righteous. I thank God through Jesus Christ our Lord. So then with the mind/spirit I, myself, serve the law of God; but with the flesh the law of sin.

Father, give us the wisdom to free ourselves from our own prisons and the understanding and strength to help others break their own chains of bondage. Thank You, for the freedom that is only found in You. Thank You for loving us even though we are so unlovable. Thank You for looking deep into our secret places and finding the good that we keep hidden from others, for bringing to life our desire to live outside the safety of our prison walls. With all blessing and honor and glory and power we exalt You and worship You.

Amen

Claudina

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References

• Hebrews 2:14-15
  14. Forasmuch then as the children are partakers of flesh and blood, he also himself likewise took part of the same; that through death he might destroy him that had the power of death, that is, the devil;
  15. And deliver them who through fear of death were all their lifetime subject to
  bondage.
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• John 13:34-35
  34. A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another.
  35. By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another.
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• Matthew 25:40-46
  40. And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.
  41. Then shall he say also unto them on the left hand, Depart from me, ye cursed, into everlasting fire, prepared for the devil and his angels:
  42. For I was an hungred, and ye gave me no meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me no drink:
  43. I was a stranger, and ye took me not in: naked, and ye clothed me not: sick, and in prison, and ye visited me not.
  44. Then shall they also answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungred, or athirst, or a stranger, or naked, or sick, or in prison, and did not minister unto thee?
  45. Then shall he answer them, saying, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye did it not to one of the least of these, ye did it not to me.
  46. And these shall go away into everlasting punishment: but the righteous into life eternal.
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• Romans 7:13-25
  13. Was then that which is good made death unto me? God forbid. But sin, that it might appear sin, working death in me by that which is good; that sin by the commandment might become exceeding sinful.
  14. For we know that the law is spiritual: but I am carnal, sold under sin.
  15. For that which I do I allow not: for what I would, that do I not; but what I hate, that do I.
  16. If then I do that which I would not, I consent unto the law that it is good.
  17. Now then it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me.
  18. For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh,) dwelleth no good thing: for to will is present with me; but how to perform that which is good I find not.
  19. For the good that I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I do.
  20. Now if I do that I would not, it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me.
  21. I find then a law, that, when I would do good, evil is present with me.
  22. For I delight in the law of God after the inward man:
  23. But I see another law in my members, warring against the law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members.
  24. O wretched man that I am! who shall deliver me from the body of this death?
  25. I thank God through Jesus Christ our Lord. So then with the mind I myself serve the law of God; but with the flesh the law of sin.
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• ** quoted from the book Connecting: healing for ourselves and our relationships - a radical new vision © 1997 by Larry Crabb, published by WORD PUBLISHING Nashville, Tennessee
  LARRY CRABB, PH.D., has been a licensed psychotherapist for over twenty-five years. He is currently professor of graduate biblical counseling at Cocorado Christian University. Larry has authored fourteen book, including Inside out, The Marriage Builder, Basic Principles of Biblical Counseling, and Who Are We and How We Relate. He and his wife, Rachel, live in the Denver, Colorado, area.
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