IT'S A FACT of life that a certain percentage of voters will be ignorant, knuckle-dragging, racist troglodytes. If they're not swinging between the parties, they're swinging between the trees.
All politicians must come to terms with the vast numbers of voters who don't know diddly, who can only grasp concepts printed in VERY BIG LETTERS AND SMALL WORDS. These voters inspire the dumbing-down of the policy debate at election time. They are a menace to mature democratic debate.
And now the Federal Government wants more of them. It is pouring hundreds of thousands of dollars into a campaign encouraging 18-year-olds to vote.
Sure, it sounds worthy. Young people are the grown-ups of the future. But the fact is, your average 18-year-old knows bugger-all about politics. For starters, teenagers don't read newspapers. I write this in the safety that none of them will read it.
They are, rightly, too busy "going off" - taking time off, getting their rocks off, getting off their faces, anything that involves the word "off".
The intricacies of tax reform have little appeal for people who think the lyrics of Regurgitator make sense. (They don't realise the GST is far more offensive than anything The Gurge could dream up.) Asked about politics, teenagers will sneer cynically and tell you "it's all bullshit". They firmly believe politicians have no solutions for their problems. Thanks to a total lack of civics education in the public and private systems, our youth offer little more to the political debate than a dangerous mix of apathy and ignorance.
According to specialists, teenagers think about sex every 30 seconds. It takes about 90 seconds to vote in the ballot box. So, while they are deciding the fate of the nation, teen voters stop three times to think about Doing the Filth. It's a miracle our Parliament isn't chockers with Cicciolinas.
The pitifully few teens who show a glimmer of understanding of politics are instantly suspect. Surely they have something better to do with their youth? The handful of young people who fronted up to the Constitutional Convention did not represent the youth of Australia, as the pundits claimed. They represented the .002 per cent of middle-class private-school graduates with big vocabs, a rudimentary grasp of the Constitution, and a desire to work for an uptown law firm. They made terrific hood ornaments for the Convention but brought no new ideas, insights or surprises to the debate, offering little more than the sentiment that one day everyone else in the room would be dead and the kids would prefer a republic to bury them in.
I'm not saying teenagers are all stupid. They should not be blamed or penalised for their youthful ignorance. Indeed, they should be envied for it. It's bliss, after all. But the average 18-year-old has never had a job, paid tax, bought health insurance, run a small business, raised a family, balanced a budget or bought a home. Why then should they be asked to decide between policy packages regarding employment, tax reform, health, industrial relations, child care and bank regulation?
As for youthful idealism being a worthy contribution! Remember those poems you wrote as a teenager? Have they stood the test of time? While it is heart-warming to see bands of youngsters marching against the slack-jawed ninnyhammers of One Nation, it is troubling to see they have no problem with the extreme Left groups that organise such marches. This is because the youngsters don't know what the extreme Left is. Until they know whose banners they are carrying, the kids should stay at home and write letters to the editor.
Asking a teen to decide what is best for the nation is like asking the man next door to design the new space-walking suit for NASA. The teen would legalise dope and demand a three-day weekend, while NASA would be left with a space suit whose only accessory is a stubby-holder.
We should save Government funds for more useful causes than enticing kids to force their unformed opinions on us. Let them decide the fate of the nation when their generation runs it.
