Life
"Life is a sexually transmitted disease with a 100% mortality rate" [Can't remember who]Yes friends, I'm here to talk about an illness that has plagued mankind since the dawn of time. Life has been proven to pass down from parent to child with ease, and medical science has so far been unable to isolate the cause. Many theories have been tried and failed, but the only certainty is that, if left untreated, results in death. However there IS hope for the sufferers.
Little William for example, was born with chronic life-syndrome. He has rosy cheeks, white teeth, and a slightly tanned complection. Every night, this poor pre-teen sleeps for as much as 9 hours a night, his little body blissfully unaware that in 60-70 years time, he could no longer be.
For just $0 a day, you can make a difference to the sufferers of this diliberating disease. You just have to look in their faces, and you'll know that YOUR donation makes a difference. With your money, you get to smile, laugh, joke, and play with your sponsored person. And who knows, if you ever get diagnosed with even a mild case of life-osis, that special person maybe able to sponsor you.
So, come on all you people out there. Life is an indiscriminate killer, and it can take as long as 120 years to complete its cycle. Go out, and make the world a better place for someone special.
How to Join
Its simple. All you have to do is find one of our nominated collection points. These are in most capital cities around the world. Failing that you can write to:
<Your Name>
<Your Address>
And on receipt, the elite postal officers to whom you addressed your request shall happilly send you a person to cheer up. And remember, Life is everywhere, but it is not a crime. Show people that you care, and hug a Life person today. The Life that you cheer up, could be your own.
Contact: C.Morris@mailbox.gu.edu.au
Date Last Modified: 12 Oct 1998
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