I once pissed in my brother's ear. I've got an excuse: I was 4 at the time, and he really does seem to have pretty big ears, but...
My brother and I used to share a bedroom and a big old bed; he was about 13 at the time. When it was too hot, I liked to get out from under the covers and sleep on the pillow. One night when I did this, I wet the bed. Right into his right ear.
I think it was the first time that my mother ever heard him curse. He was jumping up and down, scaring me pissless, letting loose with all of these words that I've never heard before.
My mother came up the stairs, furious that she had been awakened, furious that her oldest son was cursing. She asked him what the hell was going on, and he told her. My mom then did something that I'll always love her for: she burst out laughing, rolling on the floor, while my brother insisted that this was NOT funny and that he needed his own room. Meanwhile, I hid in the corner.
Needless to say, this sordid tale has managed to become Family Lore, especially good for bringing up around the holidays, and even my brother admits now that it was pretty funny. It's really funny to piss in your brother's ear at age 4, but now that I'm 26, it's just not as funny. I can't recommend trying it.
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