2. Really, it's unclear why we still have either of them around. However, the age of plastic money is closer than the age of mass producing humans from tubes.
3. Any one you get has already been touched and fondled by countless people.
4. Neither are really worth all that much unless you have a lot of them.
5. You can get a hundred of either for a dollar if you know where to go and how to play things. Thailand comes to mind for the girl part.
6. Both have discernable, yet unequal heads and tails.
7. Pennies don't get no pms.
8. You can always tell how old a penny is. Well, unless it's all green and mossy. But at that point you know you don't want it anyhow.
9. If you do get a gross penny, it's fairly easy to pass off. But if you get yourself a green and mossy girl, well, it's with you for what seems like life.
10. No redneck ever impregnated no penny which grew to be a white trash slob that bullied me in high school.
11. You can say the word 'box' in the presence of a penny and it's okay.
12. If you handle a lot of pennies, your hands smells like pennies. If you handle a lot of girls, sooner or later you're going to have some kids. Or at least have your hands in your pants, scratching like mad.
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