Taco Bell Girl, like HarveysGirl, gets her name from her workplace, though I could have called her Physically Perfect Girl. Do I have to explain that? Probably not, but I might as well while I'm here, right? Well, I've had my eye on tbg for quite some time, just never bothered to act on anything I felt. She's under 5 feet tall, has short copper hair, marvelous thick-rimmed glasses, *the* best little lips, and is surprisingly stacked up front. There you go, physically perfect to me. And the thing is, she was the kind of flawed perfect that I really dig. Not airbrushed model perfect, but flawed perfect. Human perfect. Like, every time I'd see her there would just be *something* out of place. Like a zit on her chin, or some kind of wacky cowlick that just wouldn't stay in the right place. Taco Bell Girl is my ultimate wet dream.

So like I said, I'd had my eye on her for quite some time. For so long, in fact, that I have a Pantsstealer story that also relates to her. And remember, Pantsstealer was over a year ago now.

Pantsstealer did enjoy Taco Bell. Or at least she professed to, one can never know. So one day we went to Bell, as we both seemed to have a taco-infested urge for food. Taco Bell Girl was there that day, though at that time she didn't have a formal title in my mind and was really just referred to as 'oh wow she's pretty!' We sat down, the 'Stealer and I, and had some type of conversation while stuffing our faces. During the conversation, Pantsstealer became bitchy and whiny and just generally annoying. I took it for a while, and then just looked at her and told her, "Look... if you don't cut that crap out I'm leaving this place with her." and pointed over to tbg at the counter, taking orders. She shut right the fuck up then, looked over at tgb, and then looked back at me completely stunned. Something along the lines of, "Fuck... she's exactly what you want, isn't she? That's what you think, isn't it?" And I looked back at her straight in the face and said something like, "You bet your flat ass she is." Not quite that harshly, but you get the picture. Pantsstealer was stunned, just fucking stunned. It was great. And she also quit whining for the night. You could argue it was shit like that that cost me my pants, but I don't think so. Bitches aren't made in a day.

So, details of the Taco Bell Girl fiasco... hmn. Well, I don't know where to start, of course. Tbg just made me feel nice. Like a real person. I really enjoyed just talking to her. She seemed like the kind of person I could never get bored just talking to. She was courteous and considerate and compassionate, it was easy to tell. One night I stayed until close with her, and as she was mopping the floor she caught a little snag, and from out of her mouth came, "Jesus!" or "Christ!" and immeadiately a hand flew up over her mouth and she looked at me and said, "Oh geez, I'm sorry... you're not Catholic, are you?" I mean, who does that?! That was so awesome! Needless to say, she seemed really cool to me, in a socially uncool way. And that kind of explains something else too... her self-imposed loner-ness. That's another something that just tugged on my heartstrings. Someone who keeps to themself... who, if she were to be had, she could be all mine! But the benefits kept coming. Being a loner = no friends! And usually, the friends of the girlfriend are trouble for me. Sometimes big trouble. Wow, how could I pass this girl up? Great conversation, physically stunning, etc etc... she had to be mine. She seemed so lighthearted and carefree too, which would be very good for me.

But of course, I hit the usual snag. I can read people pretty well, but only if I'm not interested in them. So of course, in my infinite male idiocy, I wasn't ever sure and blah blah blah. But little by little, I convinced myself that she really did like me. And then something else came up as well, which was the clincher to go and ask her out.

There's a few important dates coming up this October. One is my birthday, which could come and go without any type of significant other, of course. It'd probably be best that way, really, so I can completely enjoy the strip bar the guys take me out to and get loaded and whatever else happens. And there'd be the awkwardness of some type of gift, which should just be skipped in general. A true, warm, honest, loving hug is all I really want this year anyhow, and I know I aint getting that. There are, however, two other important dates this year which I'm going to need some accompanyment to, and either or both of them could be better with a girl with me. The first one, as everyone knows, is Halloween. I fucking love Halloween. I go apeshit, I just think it's great. The past couple years I haven't had much fun on Halloween, and this year I had big plans for it. I figured it'd be great to go out trick or treating again, and thought tbg might dig it too. Also, coming up earlier, is the Bad Religion concert. I still don't have anyone to go with, it kind of bites. I'll dig someone up, I guess. No one who'll appreciate it, but fuck... no one else there is going to appreciate it like I will.

So with those reasons in mind, I got my shit together, and I asked that miniature goddess of tacos and nacho cheese out.

And was turned down, of course.

And you know, it wasn't that bad, because she was honest with me, and took some actual time and care and patience and consideration in explaining the situation to me. That meant a lot to me. It wasn't just a "eww, you're creepy please go away" shut down. I've had my share of those, and no sir... I don't like it. She was very nice and tried to be very clear and didn't beat around no damn bushes, and you have to respect that. Though the reasons may be fake(fuck, aren't they always?), I don't think the sentiment was. And if it was, well... at least it was good enough to fool me. If it was, at least she put some effort into it!

She did, however, leave me a little confused about something else. I really, and I mean really felt a hint that she wanted me to keep trying at her. But... I also really don't want to misread her and become an annoyance, because who gives hints like that, you know?
Ahh, the confusion that I live in.

Lessons? Well, hmn, not a whole lot of new ones. Having balls pays off in one way or another, whether it be conquest and success, or just finally being able to know where you stand with other people... though in this case it's a little murkier than I'd like it to be. But I mean, she does work at Taco Bell... it's not like I won't be seeing her again! They know what I order, for craps sake. Maybe there's another lesson too. When I went and asked her out, I fully expected that I'd get a positive response. I figured all it would be would be a matter of me actually saying the words to do it, and then it'd be history, we'd be out at a tiny Italian restaurant I'd just discovered by the following weekend. I don't know if it's a lesson or more of a reminder that I'm not always that big on surprises.

I guess there was one other thing I had to realize and re-realize too. Something about me and people. About the people that won't give me the chance I'm looking for. I really believe a lot of people are missing out. When people won't give me a chance and find out what I'm really like... they're only harming themselves. It'd like living in a full range of vision without ever seeing yellow, I think. Yeah, to the people who pass me off as nothing, I stay nothing... but to those willing to give me a chance... they rarely ever come out the same after knowing me. Like I say... the people who treat me well have it made. Those who don't will all taste my piss or eat a sausage that's been in my ass one day.

She was beautiful and intelligent(although not enough to accept my proposal... she would have been a queen...), and she worked at Taco Bell...

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