Once again I got to thinking about my joyous upbringing as a Christian. I only remember bits and pieces of the bible, and what I do remember, bored the shit out of me and sent up big red flags of protest in my mind. Occasionally, something someone says bring back a bible memory, and it usually becomes the basis for a new bit, such as today. Today a couple of co-workers of mine were talking about their drinking habits, and it got my mind rolling again. I remember a part from the bible stating that the body is a temple. I know that that is or nearly is a direct quote. And we all know about the negative effects of alcohol on the human body. So why then, if the body is a temple, do they give us wine at communion? Fuck that blood of Christ bullshit. If it tastes like wine, IT'S FUCKING WINE. It's not the blood from some guy that died two thousand years ago. It's just wine. It seems a little hypocritical to me that if the body is such a great temple, that we wouldn't have changed our practices knowing what we know now. It's like they're blessing everyone for killing brain cells. I got my first communion at ten. It's like they start early while the brain is still developing to kill enough to keep people coming. They always passed the plate for offerings right after communion, also. Here's some wine, now shut up and give us some money! Fuck that. If I'm going to give money (assuming that I ever go to church again), get me some decent goddamn wine. The church gets some special crap wine that's only for churches. I can just imagine the liquor store owners. Here, we'll sell you churches this crap wine that no one in their right mind would actually buy. The stuff my church got made you pucker up like you were drinking whiskey. For fuck's sake, they sell wine in box that tastes better than that shit. Maybe if they got better tasting wine, more people would go. Get some really good shit from France or something like that, and shit even I'd go back. Fuck, free wine? I'm there man! Damn that was good. Money? Sure, just get some more of that shit, man! It's fucking great. Wine tasters start going to church. "I had this magnificent wine at St. Luke's not long ago.", or "Oh, the wine at St. Peter's is a true testament to Christ." But the people in the church would never think of that. They're all too stupid because they've been drinking shitty wine since they were ten.