The boys stood in the cold hallway of the dark hospital. Rain poured down outside but nobody seemed to notice. All of them were letting it sink in. The news that Nick was quitting the Backstreet Boys. Brian,who was taking it really hard, hadn't said a word since they'd left Nick's room. Howie cleared his throat and the others looked up. He looked at Donna and Johnny Wright,their managers. AJ's mom,Denise,was seated next to him."What do we do now?," Howie asked.Johnny sighed,and shook his head."Honestly,Howie,there is nothing to do.Nick seems pretty well set up in his mind that this is what's best for everybody. We've talked to his parents.They are behind him,no matter what his decision.His mom knows that this is the last thing he wants,but she also knows there is no way possible to talk him out of it,"Johnny explained. Kevin slammed his first into his opened hand."That's a bunch of bull! Nick knows how important his music is to him!And he's gonna let it go to waste to protect himself!," Kevin cried."Whoa,Kevin.Think about it for a minute. Nick isn't doing this to be selfish. Nick thinks that by quitting the band,he's saving you guys the embarrassment. He's right about his arm-his performance would be very limited,and he'd have to be overly careful.He knows this is what you guys want-to be up onstage,singing and dancing together for thousands of fans.Having a good time.Can you do that with him tagging along,frightened that every move might screw you up?," Donna intervened. Kevin fell silent. "I think you're right,"AJ said.His mom nodded, and put an arm around him."Look you guys," she said,"I think that what you need to do is just give him time. Maybe he'll realize that regardless of any kind of handicaps or disabilities,you're his friends.You want him up there, in the spotlight with you. He's got to see that he's making the wrong decision." Howie ran his hands through his hair and sighed."I don't think he's going to change his mind,"Kevin said.Brian was the only one not talking."Brian?," Donna called.He didn't answer. His face was turned away from all of them, leaned back against the wall."Brian,"AJ tapped him on the leg,and he turned to them with tears in his eyes."He isn't changing his mind.Nick has made his decision.This is it for us,whether we're ready for it or not," he snapped. Then he stood up and wiped his eyes,walking down the hall alone. "So that's it?, Howie asked,his voice barely a whisper,"It's over?" Kevin and AJ looked at him. "Call me crazy,but I'm being totally selfish. I don't think just because Nick wants to give up that we should," AJ replied."You're not being selfish at all.I want the same thing,"Kevin said.He turned to Howie and asked,"Don't you?" Howie looked sceptical."It's not the same,and you know it," he told them. "But we can deal with this.As long as we stick together," AJ tried to encourage him,but Howie looked ready to throw in the towel."Backstreet Boys is a five-member thing. We've been doing this for years,you guys. Our lives are our music.The fans are so important to us.How do we look if we let Nick bail on us,and we carry on like nothing happened.Like we're saying,'So what,Nick wasn't that important to us anyhow,'.I just don't like it at all.Backstreet Boys isn't the same without Nick.It just wouldn't be.If it was meant to be like that,Nick wouldn't have been with us from the very beginning," Howie was standing up now,facing a window."Guys?," Nick was standing now. He was dressed,but looked very tired. "I just came to let you know that I'm leaving for the airport in a little while. My mom booked a flight back to Orlando," he told them.They didn't speak.Donna, Johnny,and Denise watched all of them."How do you feel,sweetie?," Donna asked, walking over to Nick."Tired.Really tired," Nick yawned,rubbing his eyes. He sighed as he watched his friends."Look," he spoke up a little louder,so they all heard him,"I really am sorry.But if I thought we could do this any other way,I'd do it in a heartbeat." As he turned to go,he heard AJ say,"You're a coward." His mom caught him by the arm,but Nick stopped her by saying,"Let him talk. He has a right to his own opinion." AJ glared at Nick,as he continued," If you thought long and hard,you'd realize you don't really want to do this. You're a coward.You want to walk out and give up.You broke your arm-so what? Take it like a man,Nick. Start work to heal your arm. We'll make the dance moves easier. We'll do more songs we don't have to dance to. But you're an idiot to just walk away." Kevin and Howie didn't cut in to add anything.They obviously felt the same way."What you don't seem to realize is how hard this is for me. I don't want to do this to you guys.But I feel like a huge burden with this cast on my arm," they didn't hear Brian walk up."Then quit.Go home,and forget we ever existed.But if you think I'm going to sit back and wait around for you to change your mind,you're crazy," Brian snapped. The others had never heard him talk like this.
So,it's all over.Do you believe it?I didn't think so! Stay tuned to find out if Brian and the boys can change Nick's mind in Chapter 6 of MISSING.
© 1997 emilybsb@hotmail.com
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