In the past couple weeks since I wrote some scribbles down here, I was diligently at work putting a criminal behind bars.  In the past couple weeks, I was in charge of the preferral (accusation) referral to trial by Summary Court Martial, and the actual court martial itself...yes another drug case.

That soldier is even now sitting in the brig at Camp Lejuine--doing his thirty days of confinement.    

Throughout the proceedings I could feel that if I wasn't being as businesslike and professional as I was, that I would be feelling rather awful for the soldier in question.  Such a petty crime in other circumstances really, and he is a good soldier outside of the conviction...but I live and breathe as the Uniform Code of Military Justice dictates.  I am it's tool and it is my current bible.

Tomorrow marks my two year anniversary of enlistment. It is the halfway mark in my term of service.  Two years already.  25 years old.  I am a better person now than I was when i cam into this man's Army.  I am changed for the better, as I had hoped--growing more into the man I needed to be...yet at heart I am still large parts young and carefree and desperate for...what?  There is still in me a fear of choosing a life, a fear of doing something that will envelop the rest of my life.  These past 25 years I have spent doing everything I could, being everything I could, and going everywhere I could--experiencing life as fully as possible.  I have seen beauty and I have my stories.  I have made friends all across the nation and I have challenged myself to go further than I ever have.  

Tomorrow is the peak of my time here.  From Monday on, it will all be a downhill road, each step closer to home and to taking back up the reigns of the fear.  I am horribly bad at commitment, and this joining the Army was a way to bolster myself on that front.  Four years is quite a commitment I'd say.  When my time here is done, I am confident that I will have the strength to walk my line and to play my role in this cast of characters.

Next month I go to the Sergeant Promotion Board.  Assuming I do well enough to be recommended for promotion, I will be going to the January PLDC course and have my sergeant stripes pinned on in February.  And then that will be as far as I go in the United States Army.  To be promoted any further would require re-enlistment.

I am excited about becoming a sergeant...a title that grants true merit to the owner.  To be a noncommissioned officer is something that will hold great worth and accomplishment to me.  Not everyone in this army will ever become a sergeant, and not everyone in this army has the potential to be an NCO.  That my chain of command believes that I will make a good NCO puts my own faith in myself.  It heartens me and makes me proud of myself and my work.  

Astrologists say that Leos are natural born leaders.  I have alwasy felt it within me the potential to be a great leader.  This will be my chance to truly take that responsibility and to see either way.  

Another thing that being an E-5 will do for me is get my out of this brigade.  The position I work now is for an E-4, which is fine for now as I AM an E-4 still.  Once February comes around though, and especially in May when I have my two years time on station at Fort Bragg...who knows where this army will send me.  SFC Wade is looking out for me, and I know that he will help get me the best assignment possible.  He has been a really great mentor and NCO to me, and while I may have casue to grumble to myself about him or something he does, I have learned an incredible amount from him--just just about my good or the military either--about life and education and sticking to your guns and your desires.  I would certainly put SFC Wade right up alongside Angel Soto on the list of men that I feel privelaged to have known.
 
 

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