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She had a beautiful apartment, she had a beautiful apartment
Well actually it was a lousy apartment, but she's very handy with her hands
and she's got Architectual Digest magazine so she knows what's she's doing
She likes to decorate her apartment in the Santa Fe tradition
I told her it was dated, but I see more of the world than she does
She got an apartment where the property is cheap, next to the freeway
She said, "I save lots of money, but I lost lots of sleep, in my apartment,
where'd the property is so cheap."
And we'd laugh, and we'd laugh, and we'd laugh, oh we'd take pot shot at passing cars
And we'd laugh, ah we were dumping the body and we'd laugh
We found a place that was dark and rotten,
a place where the police helicopters would never spot it
I destroyed the map that we so carefully plotted
Everyday we were dumping the body, she and me, every single day
And we'd laugh about it
That's when I knew it was time that we both kill ourselves together
Together we we nothing but a menace, apart we were nothing but lonely
I read too much, I though we should kill ourselves
She doesn't read a thing, she believed me
"Are you really the messiah?
"Yes I am"
She was younger than me too, She was younger than me
And I said to her, I said, "You know Pauline, no one stamps on a burning bag of shit anymore, noboday"
"Are you really the messiah?"
"Yes I am"
So ah, we opted to kill ourselves, as I said but we had one rifle, and one bullet,
so I told her to put her head down close to the barrel, and put the barrel sorta into her mouth
and I'd be right behind her, with my head right behind hers. I said her life would end instantly
Mine might have a few extra minutes of agony and suffering
We couldn't pull the trigger, so we attached a string to it, around the lamp and to the doorknob
the first person to come into our apartment would blow both our heads off
We got to thinking, we changed our minds, you know, I mean we got scared and uh,
We kinda chickened out, and we, and we laughed, you know
We laughed about it, what were we thinking?
You know together we're not that bad ya know, we're not that bad
We don't need to kill ourselves, we don't need to kill ourselves
And then the D train rattled overhead
Knocked the joor, ajar, the jor adar, the door ajar, the jar adoor, the door ajar
the lock, the faulty lock, the door swung open and killed her!
"That's my story, and I'm sticking to it"
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