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The Secrets of Sexual Retardation Hello. My name is Dr. Bernard Hapscum, and before you read the rest of this article I'd like you to sit down, close your eyes, and ask yourself, is there something missing in my life? For many people around the entire world, that answer is yes. And these people don't realise that there is one thing, yes that's right just one thing, that could give them a meaningful existence. Research reveals that over 90% of people are too advanced in their sexual behaviour. That's right, 9 out of every 10 people in the western world have no idea of the powers of sexual retardation. This is why I have compiled The Secrets of Sexual Retardation

Dr. Bernard Hapscum was educated at Willywaw University in Southeast Burma, receiving his PhD in the packaging of small cubical objects. He has since been in hot demand.

Sex is a basic function of our lives. Why clutter it up with modern dogmatic theory? We need to get back to the animistic functionality of sex, the pure unadulterated power and energy. Foreplay is out the window, no more missionary positions, THIS WILL REVOLUTIONISE YOUR LIFE! And the beauty of The Secrets of Sexual Retardation is, it has no limit! Retardation unto absentia, that is what many people have already achieved.

Remember

• The Secrets of Sexual Retardation will unleash the most powerful creative forces in you.
• The Secrets of Sexual Retardation will lead to a more unfulfilling lifestyle.
• The Secrets of Sexual Retardation will seriously retard your sexual existence.

The POWERFUL Secrets of Sexual Retardation are available on video, presented in an attractive glossy purple cover, with hi-fi stereo sound. Order within 14 days and receive a free small cubical object attractively packaged in modern hi-density foam.

Ring me right now. I am sitting at the telephone eagerly awaiting your call. Phone 0800-NOSEXNO