STANDING ON THE SHOULDER OF GIANTS (Big Brother)

Celebrity Squares

Oasis' new album is more pipe and slippers than Cigarettes & Alcohol

People have selective memories when it comes to Oasis. Over the course of the past two years their alright third album has been transformed in peoples' memories into the pop equivalent of asbestos. Children's ears are covered when strains of "Stand By Me" waft over the airwaves. The site of the infamous 'Roller in a swimming pool' cover shoot has been exorcised and declared a monument to human suffering.

Yes, the title, cover, production and a bunch of the songs on 'Be Here Now' (urgh) were bad, yet the album was greeted with universal praise. It wasn't until the second-hand shops of the country called for the UN to help them deal with the 'Be Here Now' surplus that the world suspected that Oasis had made a boo-boo.

"Time heals all wounds," the saying goes "except 'Be Here Now'". And now, here be Oasis again with their fourth album. 'Standing On The Shoulder Of Giants' is ready to hit the streets soon, if we're to believe the anti-hype, the Record & Tape Exchange one day later. Internal strife, record company collapse, hiring members of Hurricane #1...none of these things instil confidence in a fan-base. But probably the biggest problem the band face is winning over a twice-shy populace.

And expectant fans of the band are being offered little help by the normally verbose media. Where 'Standing On The Shoulder...' is concerned, pundits are far more inclined to sit on the fence, covering themselves in case it turns out to be - gasp! - "a bit dull".

So is it? Well, yeah, a bit. While the album as a whole sounds more urgent and dynamic than its predecessor it's also difficult to pick real standout you're-my-best-mate tracks. The charmingly named "Fuckin' In The Bushes" is possibly the best thing on the album and pathos comes from "Little James", Liam's tribute to his wife's first child - although Jim Kerr will probably now start pop's first musical custody battle by re-releasing 'Don't You Forget About Me'. The lyrics are, as always, a mix of disarmingly eloquent observation and total and utter garbage (cf "I can see a liar, Sitting by the fire"). The provisional title was "Where Did It All Go Wrong?", but this was jettisoned in favour of the £2 coin misquote at the last minute.

But the real problem doesn't lie with the record, it's with the band. Oasis have been the biggest thing on Britain's pop cultural map for a long time, and in the absence of the invention of any new killer drugs or teen soaps they're just about the only safe bet for newspapers wanting to reach out to the 'youth' demographic. This was OK back when they were The Wild Boys Of Rock spitting, snorting and swearing their way around the globe like melodic Vikings but nowadays it's just not the same. They're no longer five lads from Burnage against the world. They're a professional rock band with only two of their old line-up remaining.

They've also gone from the front page of The Sun to the cover of The Guardian's weekend magazine. Liam has been hushed by the birth of wee Lennon. For all his portrayal in the tabloids as Mammon incarnate, Noel can't help but come across as likeable and fairly level-headed. Even his recent comments on American radio about Jesus failed to ignite widespread condemnation. Meg's Sunday newspaper diaries probably didn't help, revealing the extent of Oasis' assimilation into celebdom.

An Oasis release used to he exciting because it would be accompanied by hundreds of increasingly lurid and semi-made-up tabloid stories. Back in those days it mattered if Oasis released the most boring album in the history of the world, because at least they had a scrapbook full of excuses. The reason they're getting such a comparatively hard ride now may have less to do with the tunes and more to do with having committed the ultimate rock sin - settling down. Maybe if Noel had thought to name his daughter 'Chapman' he might have got a bit more respect.

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c 2000 Andrew Turner

aturner@interalpha.co.uk

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