"Yeah" - the Meg Mathews column"

It was our big launch party for the Titanic restaurant a few days ago. I was really nervous beforehand (I kept dreaming that I was floating on a raft and Noel was turning blue), but thankfully all of our mates came to our rescue - Oasis, All Saints, Bryan Adams and John Cusack. The Spice Girls came straight from performing in the Royal Variety Show (they were still curtsying), but they didn't manage to drag Prince Charles along. I was particularly grateful to Victoria and Mel B who, despite being heavily pregnant, managed to look impossibly glamorous. I was dressed as a punk, with spiky hair and lots of zips that kept coming undone. The piece de resistance was an ice sculpture of the Titanic that spouted vodka out of one of its funnels. Wicked!

The next day - I didn't get to bed until well after three - I was so tired that I fell asleep in front of the open fire nursing the cats, who all had a touch of flu. I woke up to discover that I had burnt my hand and the doctors tell me I could have permanent scarring. I was more worried that the cats' fur might have been singed.

Because I am off to a health farm for a couple of days - I'm in need of some renovation after all this partying - I thought I would go shopping for last-minute stocking fillers, but instead I ended up in Ralph Lauren choosing a pair of gorgeous padded ski trousers. I also nipped into Gina and bought a pair of black boots that definitely won't be seeing snow.

As a pre-Christmas treat, I had invited my mum and dad, Aunty Irene and Unlce Tony to London to see Rod Stewart perform at Earl's Court. We got there just in time to hear his rendition of Noel's Cigarettes & Alcohol. I've always been a bit of a Rod fan - David Cassidy was too clean-cut for me - and he was brilliant and kept kicking footballs into the audience. It was just like being at home. I then took my family onto Browns nightclub - my mum and dad had never been before and it was all I could do to drag them off the dancefloor.

The next day, they came over to Supernova Heights for lunch and a drink in our local - a great Irish pub on Haverstock Hill. My parents are going to be house-sitting in the country while Noel and I are away. I'm a bit sad to be missing Top Of The Pops on Christmas Day (a bit of a tradition in our home), but I'm taking my CD with Slade's Merry Christmas Everybody on it. I just hope Mum remembers to tape Eastenders.

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c 1998 Andrew Turner

aturner@interalpha.co.uk

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