"Yeah" - the Meg Mathews column"

It has been a fabulous week in Phuket - loads of bloody marys. We met up with some friends who are also here from London. They took us to Ao Patong on the west of the island, where we spent the evening going mad for it. It's like Ibiza, with hundreds of tourists - except that here there are kick-boxing bars and lady boys. It's really full-on mental, with loads of girls doing various things on tables. We ended up in a place called the Safari Club, an enormous rave where we hung out until three or four in the morning. I'm sure that Sky TV will be filming Thailand Uncovered here soon.

Noel has been busy writing the new album with a beer in one hand and an acoustic guitar in the other, so every day I've booked myself tennis lessons, only to cancel them each evening at 5pm, when I realise I'd rather sit by the pool with a cocktail watching the sun go down. I've spent most of the time lying on the beach reading trashy novels, with the occasional dip in the sea - although last time I went in I was stung by a giant jellyfish. It wrapped a tentacle around my ankle and then swam off looking rather queasy. I think it had become a vodka jellyfish. We also bumped into Mr and Mrs Harry Enfield [UK comedian] on the beach - and what a thoroughly nice chap.

I hooked up with a really old friend called Dorinda, who set up the Banyan Tree Spas. She has me doing yoga, healing treatments and working on my chakras for a couple of hours every morning. At one point, she had to wrestle the mobile phone out of my hands during tantric meditations - I could have sworn she had told me to recharge my batteries.

Last night we wenr for dinner at the beautiful and simple home of some Thai friends who live in the middle of a rice paddy - but Noel managed to watch the boxing by satellite, and we stayed up talking until Newcastle vs Charlton came on.

I've just been on the phone to Fran, who has had a skiing accident while on holiday in France. She was on a black run, and managed to pull a ligament. She has to wear a leg brace, but still manages to get to the clubs. Get well soon!

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c 1998 Andrew Turner

aturner@interalpha.co.uk

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