Who are these guys!?!?
Cosmos 954
The lead guitarist for the orbitals, Cosmos 954, can pick a mean surf tune like no other. Trained in the art of Zen guitar playing he somehow picks the strings without ever touching them with his fingers. It is the popular belief that Cosmos 954 never misses a note and if it sounds like he does then the audience has not been fully acclimated to his idea of tonality. Cosmos 954 also writes most of the songs and usually comes up with the best material after he has been on a six month fugue. His guitar is a vintage Guild that was bought at a flea market for a mere 20 cents and serves as the outlet for all his angst and frustration. When asked what the name of his guitar was he declined to answer, stating that, "If I told you I would have to kill you."
Baron Von Bowling
Front man and bass guitarist for the orbitals, Baron Von Bowling, can be described in several ways: witty, amusing, sexy, bad ass, tough, and sloppy. The Baron has been hailed the king of the surf bass but the reason for his superior ability is no secret. What, you might ask, gives The Baron his impeccable timing, revolutionary bass style, and ability to play behind his head without missing a beat? Ignorance, plain and simple. He has no idea what the hell he is doing, and if he did the orbitals would surely go down in flames. As a front man he is charming and witty and manages to keep the audience on the edge of their seats waiting to hear the next side splitting comment spring from his mouth. When one woman was asked why she found The Baron so attractive she answered, "It's the way he smells, he has the most amazing pheromones!" The Baron scoffs at this comment stating that, "It's no secret that I have great natural B.O. What people should know is that I'm great in bed too."
Future Boy
The drummer for the orbitals, Future Boy, has mastered the art of surf drumming to such an extent that he sometimes can keep a beat with only a roll of duct tape to aid him. A drummer from birth, Future Boy has studied with such greats as George "A-Go-Go" Hamilton and Freddy "Bam-Bam" Martinelli. Always on the ball and always able to find a new and innovative groove to complement Cosmos 954's musical genius, Future Boy is known across the globe as "the best thing to hit the music scene since Milli Vanilli." While he sometimes incorporates groudbreaking techniques such as dropping sticksand using duct tape for a drum head, he realizes that not everyone can appreciate how innovative and controversial these techniques are. Consequently he usually tries to adhere to a fairly straight ahead style. While he could afford just about any drum set he chose, Future Boy chooses to play on a beat up beginners set that has a tendency to fall apart at inopportune moments because it adds to "the orbitals sound." When asked what he turns to for inspiration when devising a new beat he stated, "I just play the drums."
Number 4
The newest member of the band, Number 4, is so named because it is the fourth member. Although not a living person, Number 4 has a personality all it's own. On some songs it is played by The Baron and provides the bass sound. If the truth be told, The Baron doesn't really know how to play it. Number 4 creates a psychic connection with The Baron and actually takes control of his hands so that he can play the song. The only set back to this is that The Baron usually falls into a trance like state that he sometimes does not return from for as much as a week. The Baron refused to comment when asked what the trance like state was like and Number 4 lacked an amplifier at the time so it was unable to respond. Number 4 has tried it's hand at composing several tunes for the band but all it could come up with was a cheesy Paula Abdul cover. When asked what it's world view on life was it responded, "Bitty bitty bit."
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