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R. called me last night. He called me before Easter so I was
really surprised to hear from him again so soon.
His wife was served the divorce papers last week. Texas has
a 60 day cooling off period so if either person changes their
mind, they can withdraw the papers. Fifty-seven days left he
said last night. She's living in an apt with two other female
bartenders she works with. She calls him and to chit chat about
things. He says he's nice to her so the divorce will go more
smoothly and she won't ask for more than he's got. But as soon
as the final papers are signed he said he'll stop taking her
calls.
Mentioned something about moving here so we could get to know
each other better and maybe get married. That won't work. First,
deep down inside he's a player. He claims he's not, he wants
a girl he can come home to, talk about his day with and if he's
had a shitty day, she'll take him out for ice cream. He doesn't
want a wife, he wants a mom.
Second, he doesn't want to marry me. Guys like him don't marry
girls like me. I told him that for years I held my breath waiting,
wondering if he'd notice me and we'd live happily ever after.
He never did. Kept telling me that there was someone out there
for me and I'd eventually find him. When he told me 2 years ago
that he was getting married I realized that I couldn't, didn't
want to wait anymore.
I accepted that we'd be friends and occassionally lovers but
that was it. No more, no less.
Now he's done a 180 degree turnaround and it's my turn to
say, heal from your broken marriage and you'll find someone else
to live happily ever after with.
He want's me to come to Lubbock, the sooner the better. I
was his rebound fuck when he broke the engagment off with Lynette
oh, those many years ago. Have no desire to do that again. Besides,
I'm with Ray and things are looking a little brighter now than
a month ago. Things are fragile between me and Ray now and I'm
not about to screw it up.
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