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superkate: journal

supervic | superjen | supersar | superkate


020701 » i'm confused

listening to | jeff buckley \ live a l'olympia
feeling | pretty good

6.50pm

today has been a really interesting day for a day that i have done nothing but sit at my computer and be a nerd.

i think my good mood stems from a four hour phone conversation i had with a friend last night. jb i want to thank you for playing your guitar and singing for me! i know i've said it before, but if ever you want to ring me and do it again, go right ahead! there is something about having a boi sing for you that is just *oooahh* :) and it's something that no one has done for me in over a year. thanks heaps! i love you dude!


there are no developments with the benny situation as yet. i'm confused about what to do. plus i'm nervous about ringing him now i'm sober. lol. what if he was only interested in me because he was drunk? i might text him later and then ring him tomorrow. we will see.

a couple of friends have asked me why i don't just jump into the ben thing, and i think it is because i know it would never turn into anything serious. i love ben, but i don't think i could ever fall in love with him. nick commented that maybe i should stop looking for love and maybe just be content to have fun for a while. i can see his point, but plain 'fun' just seems so pointless. i'm not looking for someone who will commit to me - commitment rather freaks me out actually - i'm just looking for someone who fills me with a feeling of elation, comfort, emotion and passion when i am with them... kind of like what it feels like when i listen to jeff buckley's music (hehe. see i told you he has ruined men for me). i've gotten that feeling while around only two people and i want to be able to feel it again. maybe i'm too idealistic.

i also don't want to feel like i'm using ben. i know he probably wouldn't see it as that, but i would still feel bad about it.

another problem is that there is a boy i've been interested in for a while, and even though i know he doesn't feel the same about me, i think i'm still holding off maybe just a little because of him. *argh* frustration!

so who here thinks i'm neurotic yet? and :P to all the guys who are thinking 'omg! not another one of these confused women who doesn't know what she wants!' we are allowed to be like this. it's how we were made. just like you were programmed to love porn and cars. :)


7.20pm

yay! glennethel just rang and he is going to stay at my place and come and see mick hart with me on friday night! woo! and he is bringing presents! :D presents are good! why don't more people buy me presents?


waxing is really, really painfull. guys do you know the sort of pain and anguish girls have to go through in order to feel pretty/sexy? a lot! every time i do it i say i'm never going to do it again, but i always do.


i got a couple of emails from jen! i miss jen!

her plane didn't crash and she still hasn't found us any sexy rock boys to bring home in her luggage for us. she hasn't been shopping yet either. though i will excuse all this as she has only been in america for like a day. hehe.

i miss nicky c already too! you better email me you email snob! i want to know eeeeeeeverything about your trip.

nick is from cairns and is spending his holidays in melbourne and adelaide. he is going to be freezing his cute little bum dimpled butt off. teeheehee.

expect a monster tackle hug when i see you at the airport in two weeks nick!

oh, and vic and i have decided we are going to give nick a makeover when the two of them move to sydney next year. we have decided that he would look pretty in pink. and nick, you better not get your haircut while you are in melbourne because you are going to need long hair so we can put it in pig tails and tie them with pink ribbons.


[sourgirl] you pair are norty!
* sourgirl spanks you both
[Orcy] oooar more
[Orcy] its his influence i swear! *points at merc*
[re0w] lol
* re0w takes the blame
[re0w] but i think i really want to this time >:)
[Orcy] :P
[sourgirl] lol
* sourgirl spanks merc... HARD
[sourgirl] hehe
[sourgirl] :P
[re0w] lol
[re0w] harder!
[re0w] im very bad
* Orcy sulks
* re0w spanks Orcy
[re0w] better?

this pair crack me up. no matter how crap a day i have had, i can always rely on petey (orcy) and the merc (re0w) to cheer me up.

and later after a discussion about my antics on saturday night...

[Orcy] whoops sorry i had to go umm attend to some needs
[re0w] hrrrrm /me (subliminal message) thinks this silence is a result of Orcy doing unspeakable acts to kate
[sourgirl] hahahha
[Orcy] lol
[re0w] some needs? ack, that was too quick....musta been too excited, u went too hard!
[Orcy] no thats a dream :P
[re0w] wet dream
[Orcy] i never said it was going to be clean
[re0w] just make sure u don't become dirty on me
[Orcy] then get the fuck outta my bed!
[re0w] well stop giving me signals dammit! i thought footsies was when u were interested!
[re0w] /finger Orcy
[Orcy] your feet were cold! i was kicking them away!
[re0w] stop it dammit....u might give the impression that we an old married couple :P
* Orcy kicks merc out of the bed and banishes him to the couch

and then supersar joined the conversation and it turned into a free for all! *reow*

sarah, promise me i can kiss you when i see you again? *reow* hehe. *reow reow*


the best pick up line ever: Kate your beauty radiates magically like the sunlight on a dew drop.

why thankyou peter, you sweetheart. hehe.


my newest friend is dan the man from tassie. i met dan because he read this website and emailed me. dan is like a male version of me. it is freaking me out. dan you are the dude! and i'm not just saying that because you are heaps like me. lol. seriously, i'm not that vain. ;)

ok well the point of that was just to say hey to dan. self indulgent of me i know, but i'm allowed to write whatever i bloody well want! so ner!

ok, now i'm getting silly.

i've been getting silly quite a bit lately. maybe i really have gone mad. *jumps up and down and stuff* *spreads some love*

oh well, better mad than boring.

toodles chookens!

xxx

days without a big smelly cancer stick for comfort: 4 x 20 - 32 = 71!!

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