Untouchable Face

think i'm going for a walk now. i feel a little unsteady. don't want nobody to follow me 'cept maybe you. i could make you happy if you weren't already. i could do a lot of things, and i do. tell you the truth, i prefer the worst of you. too bad you had to have a better half. she's not really my type, but i think you two are forever. and i hate to say it, but you look perfect together. so fuck you and your untouchable face. and fuck you for existing in the first place. who am i that i should be vying for your touch? who am i? bet you can't even tell me that much. two-thirty in the morning and my gas tank will be empty soon. neon sign on the horizon, rubbing elbows with the moon. a safe haven of sleepless where the deep fryer's always on and the radio is counting down the top twenty country songs. and out on the porch, the fly strip is waving like a flag in the wind. y'know, i don't look forward to seeing you again. you look like a photograph of yourself taken from far, far away. and i won't know what to do, and i won't know what to say. except fuck you and your untouchable face. and fuck you for existing in the first place. who am i that i should be vying for your touch? who am i? i bet you can't tell me that much. i see you and i'm so perplexed. what was i thinking? what will i think of next? where can i hide? in the back room, there's a lamp that hangs over the pool table and when the fan is on it swings gently side to side. there's a changing constellation of balls as we are playing. i see orion and say nothing. the only thing i can think of saying is fuck you and your untouchable face. and fuck you for existing in the first place. who am i that i should be vying for your touch? who am i? i bet you can't tell me that much.

Outta Me, Onto You

no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no more. it's gonna be sudden, it's gonna be strange. i'm gonna turn on a dime, give you 5 cents change. it's gonna be long overdue. it's all gonna come out. out of me, on to you. out of me, on to you. one of these days you're gonna push too hard. we'll go on like we've always done till you go too far. one of these days it's gonna reach the top. then it's gonna start to spill and it's not gonna stop. out of me, on to you... no more. some people wear their smile like a disguise. those people who smile a lot, watch the eyes. i know cause i'm like that a lot, you think everything's okay it is till it's not. out of me, on to you... no more. some people wear their heart up on their sleeve. i wear mine underneath my right pant leg strapped to my boot. don't think cause i'm easy, i'm naive. don't think i wanna pull it out. don't think i'm gonna show it. out of me, on to you... no more. most people like to talk a lot, including you. you know there isn't much i have to say that i wouldn't rather just shut up and do. i'm gonna miss you when you're gone. i'm gonna be torn. just remember that i love you. just remember you were warned. out of me, on to you... no more, no more.

Superhero

sleepwalking through the all night drug store, baptized in fluorescent light. i found religion in the greeting card aisle. now i know hallmark was right. and every pop song on the radio is suddenly speaking to me. art may imitate life, but life imitates tv. 'cuz you've been gone exactly two weeks. two weeks and three days. and let's just say things are different now. different in so many ways. i used to be a superhero. no one could touch me, not even myself. you are like a phone booth that i somehow stumbled into. and now look at me, i am just like everybody else. if i was dressed in my best defenses, would you agree to meet me for coffee? if i did my tricks with smoke and mirrors, would you still know which one was me? if i was naked and screaming on your front lawn, would you turn on the light and come down screaming, "there's the asshole who did this to me." stripped me of my power, stripped me down. i used to be a superhero. no one could hurt me, not even myself. you are like a phone booth that i somehow stumbled into. and now look at me, i am just like everybody else. yeah you've been gone exactly two weeks. two weeks and three days and now i'm a different person. different in so many ways. tell me, what did you like about me and don't say my strength and daring. 'cuz now i think i'm at your mercy and it's my first time for this sort of thing. i used to be a superhero. i would swoop down and save me from myself. but you are like a phone booth that i somehow stumbled into. and now look at me, i am just like everybody else.

Dilate

life used to be life-like. now it's more like show biz. i wake up in the night and i don't know where the bathroom is. and i don't know what town i'm in or what sky i am under. and i wake up in the darkness and i don't have the will anymore to wonder. everyone has a skeleton and a closet to keep it in and you're mine. every song has a you, a you that the singer sings to. and you're it this time. baby, you're it this time. when i need to wipe my face i use the back of my hand. and i like to take up space just because i can. and i use my dress to wipe up my drink. i care less and less what people think. you are so lame. you always disappoint me. it's kinda like our running joke, but it's not really funny. i just want you to live up to the image of you i create. i see you and i'm so unsatisfied. i see you and i dilate. so i'll walk the plank and i'll jump with a smile. if i'm gonna go down, i'm gonna do it with style. and you won't see me surrender. you won't hear me confess, 'cuz you've left me with nothing, but i've worked with less. and i learn every room long enough to make it to the door. and then i hear it click shut behind me. and every key works differently. i forget every time. and the forgetting defines me, that's what defines me. when i say you sucked my brain out, the english translation is i am in love with you and it is no fun. but i don't use words like love, 'cuz words like that don't matter. but don't look so offended. you know, you should be flattered. i wake up in the night in some big hotel bed. my hands grope for the light. my hands grope for my head. the world is my oyster. the road is my home, and i know i'm better off alone.

Amazing Grace

amazing grace, how sweet the sound that saved a wretch like me. i once was lost, but now i'm found, was blind, but now i see. 'twas grace that taught my heart to fear and grace that fear relieved. how precious did that grace appear the hour i first believed. through many dangers, toils, and snares i have already come. 'twas grace that brought me safely this far and grace will lead me home. and when the heart and flesh shall fail and mortal life shall cease, i shall possess within the vale a life of joy and peace.

Napoleon

they told you your music could reach millions. the choice was up to you. you told me they always pay for lunch and they believe in what i do. and i wonder if you'll miss your old friends once you've proven what you're worth. and i wonder when you're a big star, will you miss the earth? and i know you always, always want more. i know you, you'll never be done. because everyone is a fucking napoleon. everyone is a fucking napoleon. and the next time that i saw you, you were larger than life. yeah, you came and you conquered, you were doing all right. you had an army of suits behind you, and all you had to be was willing. and i said i still make a pretty good living. you must make a killing, a killing. and i hope that, that you are happy. i hope that at least you are having fun. oh, but everyone is a fucking napoleon. well, everyone is a fucking napoleon. you say that, so that's the way it's gonna be. so that's what this is all about. i think that that's the way it always was. you chose not to notice until now. oh now that, now that there's a problem. you call me up to confide and you go on for over an hour about each one that took you for a ride. and i guess that you dialed my number because you thought for sure that i'd agree. i said, "baby, you know i still love you, but how dare you complain to me." oh, but everyone is a fucking napoleon. everyone is a fucking napoleon. everyone is a fucking napoleon.

Shameless

i cannot name this. i cannot explain this and i don't really want to. just call me shameless. i can't even slow this down, let alone stop this. and i keep looking around, but i cannot top this. if i had any sense i guess i'd fear this. i guess i'd keep it down so no one would hear this. i guess i'd shut my mouth and rethink a minute. but i can't shut it now 'cuz there's something in it. we're in a room without a door, and i'm sure without a doubt, they're gonna want to know how we got in here. and they're gonna want to know how we plan to get out. we better have a good explanation for all the fun that we had 'cuz they are coming for us babe, and they are going to be mad. yeah, they're going to be mad at us. this is my skeleton. this is the skin that it's in. that is, according to light and gravity. i'll take off my disguise. the mask you met me in, 'cuz i got something for you to see. just gimme your skeleton. give me the skin that it's in. yeah baby, this is you according to me. i never avert my eyes. i never compromise, so never mind the poetry. i gotta cover my butt 'cuz i covet another man's wife. i gotta divide my emotions into wrong and right. the i got to see how close i can get to it without giving in. then i get to rub up against it till i break the skin. rub up against it till i break the skin. they're gonna be mad at us. they're gonna be mad at me and you. they're gonna be mad at us and all the things we wanna do. just please don't name this. please, don't explain this. just blame it all on me. say i was shameless. say i couldn't slow it down, let alone stop it. and say you just hung around 'cuz you couldn't stop it.

Done Wrong

the wind is ruthless. the trees shake angry fingers at the sky. the people hunch their shoulders, hold their collars over their ears and run by. it's a cold rain. it's a hard rain like the kind you find in songs. i guess that makes me the jerk with the heartache he to sing to you about how i been done wrong. i am sitting, watching out the window of the coffee shop. and i'm waiting, waiting, waiting for it to let up. i am rocking like a cradle, warming my hands with the cup in between. i am leaning over the table holding my face over the steam. and before it gets so cold that the rain turns to snow, there's a couple of things i'd like to know. like how could you do nothing and say, "i'm doing my best." how could you take almost everything and then come back for the rest? how could you beg me to stay, reach out your hands and plead and then pack up your eyes and run away as soon as i'd agreed? it just all slips away so slowly. you don't even notice it till you've lost a lot. i've been like one of those zombies in vegas, pouring quarters into a slot. and now i'm tired and now i'm broke. and i feel stupid and i feel used. and i'm at the end of my little rope. and i am swinging back and forth about you. before it gets so cold that the rain turns to snow, there's a couple of things i'd like to know. like how could you do nothing and say, "i'm doing my best." how could you take almost everything and then come back for the rest? how could you beg me to stay, reach out your hands and plead and then pack up your eyes and run away as soon as i'd agreed?

Going Down

you can't get through it. you can't get over it. you can't get around. just like in a dream you'll open your mouth to scream and you won't make a sound. you can't believe your eyes. you can't believe your ears. you can't believe your friends. you can't believe you're here. and you're not going to get through it, so you are going down. i put a cup on the windowsill to catch the water as it fell. now i got a glass half full of rain to measure the time in between when you said you'd come and when you actually came. little mister limp dick is up to his same old tricks and thought he'd call me one last time. but i'm just about done with the oh-woe-is-me shit, and i want everything back that's mine.

Adam and Eve

tonight you stooped to my level. i am your mangy little whore. now you're trying to find your underwear and then your socks and then the door. and your trying to find a reason why you have to leave, but i know it's cuz you think you're adam and you think i'm eve. you rhapsodize about beauty and my eyes glaze. everything i love is ugly. i mean really, you would be amazed. just do me a favor, it's the least that you can do. just don't treat me like i am something that happened to you. i am truly sorry about all this. you put a tiny pin prick in my big red balloon. and as i slowly start to exhale, that's when you leave the room. i did not design this game. i did not name the stakes. i just happen to like apples and i am not afraid of snakes. i am truly sorry about all this. i envy you, your ignorance. i hear that it's bliss. so i let go the ratio of things said to things heard. as i leave you to your garden and the beauty you preferred. and i wonder what of this will have meaning for you, when you've left it all behind. i guess i'll even wonder if you meant it at the time.

Joyful Girl

i do it for the joy it brings because i'm a joyful girl. because the world owes me nothing and we owe each other the world. i do it because it's the least i can do. i do it because i learned it from you. and i do it just because i want to, because i want to. everything i do is judged and they mostly get it wrong. but, oh well, 'cuz the bathroom mirror has not budged. and the woman who lives there can tell the truth from the stuff that they say. and she looks me in the eye and says would you prefer the easy way. no, well, ok then. don't cry. i wonder if everything i do i do instead of something i want to do more. the question fills my head. i know there's no grand plan here. this is just the way it goes. when everything else seems unclear, i guess at least i know. i do it for the joy it brings because i'm a joyful girl. because the world owes me nothing and we owe each other the world. i do it because it's the least i can do. i do it because i learned it from you. and i do it just because i want to, because i want to.