S e x u a l a b u s e
- the victims and affects
Who are the victims?
As we already said the victims are both girls and boys. They are from all social levels and the abuse itself may have been for a long period of time (several years) or 'only' once. However the case; child sexual abuse is always damaging. For a child affected by childhood sexual abuse it may take a long time before she or he is able to live a 'normal' life, if ever.
It's very common that people, who as children themselves have been molested, become parents to abused children when growing up. This because of many things. Thsi may sound a bit scary to anyone who as a child was abused, but there's hope. By dealing with one's own trauma, this risk is minimized.
Healing by dealing with the trauma
The only way for a victim of child sexual abuse to become a survivor, to heal, is to deal with the things that has happened.
There are a few things survivors often have in common. Because of the abuse one could say the victims are 'programmed' into some characteristics, at least somewhat.
Depending on how severe the abuse was and if there was any kind of safety in the surroundings the survivors develop these characteristics differently.
M P D
( Multiple
Personal
Disorder)
These things may occur as a result of child sexual abuse trauma:
Some of the things survivors MAY have in common
- depression
- selfinjury
- selfmurder
- mental illness
(the abuse
may be what
triggers it.)
- lack of identity
- shame
- quilt
- sorrow
- lack of
body control
(or extreme
body control)
- sexual identity
confusion
- fear
- Survivors often become either afraid od sex or 'addicted'
to it.
Since human sexuality is such a emotional thing, some
people, who's sexuality has been hurt 'protect' it from
further harm in all the ways possible.
Others then again loose their sense of feeling and
'doesn't feel' anymore. They recognize the advantages
in their sexuality, often using it for money etc.
(prostitution)
- Many Survivors's lifes seem to be a whole chain of
chrises and chaos.
Since used to living in fear and chaos many survivors
put themselves in dept, get involved with others in chrises
or tend to get into stormy marriages.
- Survivors are the caretakers in the family
Since from early childhood they have been thought to
take care of themselves and others. Because a child
sexually abused is 'taken into' the adult world so qickly
the child then takes a responibility that is not really its.
- Victims of sexual abuse gets poor self concept
A child, who has been molested, has had its boundaries
'spit' on, that's why it later in life 'settles' for whatever
that comes up, -marries the first man that shows any
interest (if not being so afraid of sex not marrying at all)
- this combinied with the caretaking often does it for
many survivors when choosing partner.
- Survivors are often very hypervigilant. (They always
know where the doors in a room are, who comes and
goes, their moods etc.)
During one part of their life, this was necessary. They
had to know, because that might save from something
terrible to happen.
This is often combined vit anxiousness and fear.
