The Gray Matter

The truth is this ... I liked the X-Files back at the beginning. Now, things just got way out of hand, and it's a wonder it lasted as long as it did. This script was based on that idea that something is out there controlling all of our destinies somehow and that we humans had no idea what we were dealing with. In short, this is a comedy tying everything together the way it should have been ... and still is. Someone is watching us from out there in the great beyond. And I think ... wait a minute, is that a camera in my computer screen?
Characters	Actors	Important Facts
Agent Wolf Moldy Agent Diana Sculler Elvis Bubble Blowing Man Dark Lord of the Dance ----------- The Lonesome Gunslingers Pizza Dude Produce Guy Stinky	Michael Richards Yasmine Bleeth Rob Schneider Jonathan Winters Don Johnson ------------- Trust me, you don't have the clearance to know us. All other material is restricted. The identities of the characters named are classified under Section U-cant-C.	FPI - Federal Paranormal Investigation Unit. Started by Wolf Moldy because he had nothing better to do. Handles all sorts of cases ... sort of. Mostly he just plays with Action Figures. Action Figures - The single most important thing in Moldy's life after the loss of his beloved banjo, Samantha. Bubble Blowing Man - the mysterious bad guy with a definitive habit. Elvis - Alien who has been on the run from "Them" for the last fifty years. Farmington, NM - the only large town for about three hours in any direction near the Four Corners area. Also the site of Agent Moldy's investigation. Visit, but don't stay. Crop Circles - Everyone's got a theory. UFO's, or just demented hedgehogs playing ring-around-the-rosy? You have to decide based on the evidence. Shrubbery - Very important (see Monty Python and the Holy Grail for more info); also, a disguise to top all other disguises. Dark Lord of The Dance - picture Darth Vader doing Riverdance. Pure evil ... and he can dance!
	All right, you asked for it. But don't say I didn't try to warn you. What you read beyond this point goes beyond all human capacity for understanding. Paranoia is a definite by product. Read at your own risk - for you will never be the same again. You will know the truth, and the truth shall make you paranoid ... Read The Gray Matter.

Return to Main Index	Visit The Gallery	Original Stories Index
Contact the Author