The First Angel Episode 2a


Written by: Loveless

Disclaimer: You know I don't own the characters.

Dru: (still holding Xander) Ha! I shall slice open your neck like I did to that rather fat slayer Kendra!

Emily : No! STTTTTOOOOOOOOOOOOP!

Cordelia: Okay, who's this loser?

Emily: (delivering flying kick to Drusilla, knocking her unconscious) Yah! I am Emily Moon, avenging sister of my dearly departed sister Jenny Calender.

Willow : That was in no way redundant.

Buffy: Then why isn't your name Emily Calender?

Emily: That will be explained in a later episode. I have come to wreck vengeance on my sister's murderer... Angel!

Angel: I did not murder your sister, Angelus did.

Emily: Are you not the same person? HAH!

Angel: In a way, but pretty boy Angel (me) cannot be blamed for the things pretty boy Angelus did. That's why noone hates me despite the fact I murdered a beautiful computer teacher.

Xander: But everyone hates me just because I told Buffy a teensy lie.

Buffy: Yes, that was in no way fair. I realised that losing Angel wasn't a scene deserving enough to have "Full of Grace" played during the background. Looking back, I realised that the proper song for that scene should have been "Time of Your Life (Good Riddance)".

Angel: Thank you , honey.

Buffy: Go fly a kite, loser. I'm so over you.

Angel: Brood.

Emily: Back to ME! I am Jenny's avenging sister, EMILY!

Giles: Wasn't your name Krista Wish?

Emily: No, that's the actress that's supposed to play me.

Willow: I couldn't find a Krista Wish on the Internet Movie Database.

Angel: So maybe you're just a rumour.

Emily: No I'm not! I'm real! I'm supposed to avenge my sister, Jenny's death.

Cordelia: Repetitive much?

Buffy: Rumours can never be taken seriously.

Spike: Is everybody forgetting my dear pet Drusilla? She's lying unconscious on the floor.

Angel: Speaking of which, why did you come and kick Drusilla anyway. If you wanted to avenge me, you should have helped Dru, since in this episode we're mortal enemies.

Emily: Oh! This information I could have used before hand. Thanks alot for telling me NOW. Now I'll have to avenge Jenny's death on my own.

Cordelia: Can you say a sentence that does not have the word "Jenny", "sister" or "avenge"?

Emily: Be quiet, I'm on a quest to avenge my sister Jenny's death.

Dru: (waking up) .... Oooooh I see the stars. Where's Miss Edith?

Cordelia: Who the heck is Miss Edith?

Spike: It's her doll. She has a doll to give her the appearance of a deadly child-like villainess, to add to the spook factor of the show.

Everyone: Oooohh.

Dru: We will meet again Angel, Buffy, Giles, Willow, Xander, Doyle, Cordelia , Oz, and whoever kicked me just now. Hahahahahahah ... (disappears in a cloud of smoke)

Oz : I didn't know vampires could do that. Cool.

Giles : By right, they can't.

Buffy: Hey, in this show, Angel and I were actually TOGETHER. Compared to that, Drusilla disappearing in smoke is logically sound.

Angel: Thank you, honey.

Buffy: I'm moving on. I think Xander's kind of hunky.

Xander: Really?

Buffy: Not really, but if we're going to hook up by the end of Season Four (according to rumours) we might as well get it over with. No use in prolonging the death sentence.

Xander : Fine with me. Shall we shag now or shag later?

Buffy: Later, on my show, because that will define and deepen our relationship, and that has to be done on MY show, not Angel's. Duh.

Xander: Fine with me, darling.

Buffy: I am so not enjoying the path this is taking. I hate rumours.

Angel: This conversation is going to make me hurl. And this is MY show! STOP STEALING MY SPOTLIGHT!

Emily: (wielding a psycho knife) Ha! Everyone seems to have forgotten me! But I'm here... preparing to AVENGE my sister Jenny's Death! PREPARE TO DIE ANGEL!!!!

Part 2

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