I hate rice so much. You are a sticky little kid. Get out. Just leave. Take your creepy overly zealous Christian mom with you. Get out of my sight, you horrible inspiration maggot.

You are my shining star! Oh god I love you oh dear sweet jesus. I am going to puke dry macaroni for a week. I am going to wash my hands.

Please just stay away from the small blocks. I have to wash those. I have to wash all of those when you leave. I have to wash those. I HAVE TO WASH THOSE GIVE ME THAT GOD DAMMIT

I don't want to go outside. Go ruin a paper plate with your mother. Do not touch me.

I swear if your mother makes you draw another fucking nativity scene I will scream. Oh god I'm so hungry.

Your dad is a mulleted backwoods creep just like you would be if you had hair. Shut up.

Oh my golly, you don't know how to make the Nintendo thingie go on and move around? Oh my goodness gracious dear sweet Jesus ha ha ha! Oh little Timmy likes to play on the Nintendo? Oh ha ha ha! Oh my goodness new technology is so confusing isn't it yes ha ha ha oh my goodness now SHUT UP.

I don't want to go outside. Stop squirting me with water. Just thinking about how many of you greasy little turds have soaked your puke-covered hands in that water makes me sick. I have to go to the bathroom and lay down.

SOMEONE'S IN HERE.

So just go the fuck outside. Just go. Go break your arms. I don't care. Go get your fucking IV torn out because you couldn't wait five fucking minutes for me to get done helping the kid with no parents from the burn unit. Where the hell are your parents, anyway?

Please don't run. Christ I have to eat

Hi, do you want to come down to the playroom? No? Good.

Where the hell did all the other volunteers go?

Where's Abdul?

Do you want to go outside? Air hockey? Do you want to paint a picture? Let me call Tom and see if he can come by. We still have an hour before the playroom closes, you know. Fine, I'll take you up. GET BACK HERE.

Really? Oh, well that's great. It'll be great seeing all your old friends. Yeah… Can you give me a hug now before you leave? Thank you. Oh gross, you're all sticky.

Where are all the usual kids?

I'm not crying. I need a drink of water. I'll be back in a second. Can you take care of everything until I get back? Yeah, I know. Ha ha ha.

Someone's in here. Be out in a minute. Yeah, ha ha ha. I know.