Four Jews in a Room Bitching
William Finn: from the march of the Falsettos
(please ask before you take these lyrics,
it took a long time to type them up)
Men//
Fours Jews in a room bitchingg
Four Jews in a room plot a crime.
I'm bitching. He's bitching
They're bitching. We're bitching.
Bitch bitch bitch bitch
Funny funny funny funny
Bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch
All the time.
Mendel//
Whadda they do for love?
Whadda they do for love?
Marvin, Whizzer & Jason//
Four Jews in a room bitching
Mendel//
Whadda they do for love?
Men//
Four Jews in a room stoop...
Mendel//
They stoop...
Men//
To pray.
Jason//
I'm Jewish.
Marvin//
I'm Jewish.
Mendel//
I'm Jewish
Whizzer//
Half Jewish
Men//
Bitch bitch bitch bitch
Funny funny funny funny
Bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch
Night and day.
It maybe seems a bit peculiar;
We are psycopathic people.
We sometimes tell a lie
But mostly we just hide behind the door.
We lie and wait for someone good to enter
We offer food and drinks.
The lady never thinks that we're the mad
We're often mad
Too often mad
We're very mad
That we're the mad experimenter. Call us
Four Jews itching for answers.
Four Jews bitching their whole life long.
Whizzer//
I'm Whizzer
Jason//
I'm Jason
Mendel//
I'm Mendel
Marvin//
I'm Marvin
Men//
Bitch bitch bitch bitch
Funny funny funny funny
Btich bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch
Right or wong.
Jason//
In case of smoke please call our mothers on the phone
And say their sons are all on fire.
Marvin//
We are manipulating people and we need to know
Our worst sides aren't ignored.
Mendel//
The guilt invested will, in time, pay wisely.
Whizzer & Jason//
We do not tippy toe.
Whizzer//
We charge ahead to show
Mendel//
We're good in bed.
Whizzer//
Excel in bed.
Marvin//
We smell in bed.
Jason//
Where is the bed?
Mendel//
I love the bed.
Jason//
Who has the bed?
Whizzer//
I want the bed.
Jason//
Who stole the bed?
Whizzer//
I lost it twice.
Mendel//
The bed is mine.
Jason//
The bed is nice.
Men//
The bed is
Four Jews in a room bitching.
Four Jews talking like Jew-ish men.
I'm neurotic, he's neurotic.
They're neurotic, we're neurotic.
BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH
FUNNY FUNNY FUNNY FUNNY
Marvin//
I'm nauseous
Whizzer//
I'm neaseous
Jason//
I'm simple.
Mendel//
I'm Jewish.
Men//
BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH
FUNNY FUNNY FUNY FUNNY
(variations on:)
Jason//
Four Jews in a room bitching
Marvin//
he's Jewish. I'm Jewish. They're Jewish
We're Jewish.
Mendel//
BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH
FUNNY FUNNY FUNNY FUNNY
Whizzer//
I'm neurotic. He's neurotic, They're neurotic. We're neurotic.
Men//
Four Jews in a room bitching
BITCH BITCH
BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH
Now and then.
Can't lose.
Loose screws.
Four Jews