FISHMONGERS
Sculder and Mully investigate a strange case
at an art gallery where works of art are turning into giant ants. Their investigation
leads them into a conspiracy and Sculder realises the truth lies on a train. Can he get
to it in time?
Why was it scrapped?
'Fishmongers' was written after the pilot script in
an
experiment to se if Hex Files worked well as one-parters. They don't. At least, not in
that particular format. There were some nice jokes and a good spoof of the train scene
from 'Nisei' and '731', but other than that it was total rubbish.
LOBSTERS
Sculder and Mully try to foil a set of kidnappings
in New York involving hamsters and chocolate bars which could lead Sculder to his
hamster....
Why wasn't it written?
The idea and summary above were written but I
quite frankly couldn't be bothered to turn it into a story. Can you imagine how rubbish
it would have been?
I WISH IT COULD BE CHRISTMAS
Following Mully's
abduction, Sculder searches for his partner in a town where it is always Christmas and
in turn meets his new allies Nicely Waxed man and the mysterious (and very violent)
Mr. Hex. Can the case be solved in time for Christmas?
Why was it scrapped?
'I Wish it Could be Christmas' was the original
second part of 'Jingle all the Way' (renamed: 'The Xmas File') and was written
in
Christmas '96 as a two-part festive special. However, when the Hex Files was put on
the Internet I wanted to use that two-parter as a Season 1 finale and so needed to
change the plot to deal with my developing mytharc the demise of Shallow Throat hence a re-write. Most of
the best jokes were used in this re-write (called: 'Restoration')
TAZOS
Sculder receives the Governments UFO files from a
man called 'The Ginger' which point him towards the Government's biggest lie: A
series of experiments involving free gifts in packets of crisps to destroy humanity!
Pipe Smoking Man blackmails Spinner into sacking Sculder who goes AWOL to find
the truth. Mully is kidnapped by Bicep but escapes only to find that Sculder has died
after being inside a bus where the truth was hidden when Pipe Smoking Man blew it
up....
Why was it scrapped?
It was dire. If there is an episode I hated, it
was this one. Basically, I needed to do a trilogy to fill up three episodes in seasons 2
and 3 and I came up with this idea based on something going on in Britain at the time.
However, it left me no room whatsoever to write anything else about it and wasn't
even remotely appealing. Luckily, I got more ideas and did a re-write (called:
'Exodus
Res Dana') which provided me with enough material to write my trilogy and do a
third
season.
15.5 MONKEYS
Sculder escaped the bus trap and set out with
Mully to prove the facts behind the conspiracy. He found a scientist who worked on
the project who revealed that Sculder's hamster played an important role in the
proceedings. Heading to the crisp factory to prove the Tazo conspiracy, Sculder is
accosted by Bicep who leads them into a trap with the Pipe Smoking Man....
Why was it scrapped?
After writing 'Tazos', I did plan out the two
concluding parts to the trilogy but as I scrapped 'Tazos', I scrapped these two parts
too. However, this script was half finished and contained some good stuff
(particularly the bit where Sculder attempts to ascertain the validity of God which I
recycled and use in 'PS234').
SMOKING IS BAD FOR YOUR HEALTH
In the shocking
conclusion to the Tazos trilogy, Sculder, Mully, Bicep and the Pipe Smoking Man
face off over the affair. Sculder wants answers and the appearance of Shallow Throat
could give them but he is shot by the Pipe Smoking Man. With everything gone,
Sculder has lost all hope. But the appearance of a new ally called Mr. Hex could
swing the whole thing around...
Why wasn't it written?
Luckily I had scrapped this whole trilogy before I
had to sit down and try to write this so you were all saved from a stupid episode
where everyone is speaking with guns in their faces. Lucky you, eh?
MOTHERING SUNDAY
It's Mothering Sunday and Mully's
mother is coming to visit. However, fate has dictated that Mully's mum is going to be
possessed by the psychopathic spirit of a long-dead Egyptian monster which is intent
on killing things.
Why did it take so long to appear?
This story was meant to be a part of
season three but
in the end I decided I wanted to do something with Dr. Who and this idea wasn’t
used. However, because I liked it so much, I went back to the idea when planning my
season five 'Pusher' and 'Kitsunegari' spoof, and so this plot appears in
that episode (now entitled: 'Pushy Mother')
THE HEX FILES: SEASON 1
Sculder and Mully's first season of cases, a few pages long with only the merest inklings of plot hung around some cheap gags about not being able to turn on light switches
Why were they all re-written?
Originally, the Hex Files were a set of sketches written for friends rather than the basis of an entire series. And so by the time season four or so rolled around, it was fairly clear that these sketches hardly resembled what the show had become. Plus I was six years younger when I wrote them and am not afraid to admit that I was an even worse writer back then (Chris Carter, take note)
The first season avaliable on the site now actually still resembles its former self very closely. The situations have stayed the same, but the comedy has been re-written. Scenes generally go on longer and the minor characters now have proper introductions. And several much needed larger changes were made (such as, for example, in the case of Sculder's first informant Shallow Throat. Who said preicesly one line in the first episode before being killed off in a way which suggested he was important. He now appears in all the season's episodes, spouting monotonus poetry and generally making you quite glad to see the back of him by season's end)
BIOGENESIS/THE SIXTH EXTINCTION/THE SIXTH EXTINCTION II: AMOR FATI
A spoof of the trilogy of episodes spanning seasons 6/7 of the Hex Files featuring Sculder's contraction of a terrible alien virus and Mully's discovery of an alien ship...
Why is it never going to appear?
Originally I was planning to spoof all of the major X-Files mythology episodes since this is where most of the major spoofable elements lie. However, this trilogy of episodes is so unspeakably *awful* that I would rather forget their existance enitrely than be forced to watch them again. Certain elements will be spoofed, mostly from the hilariously bad 'Amor Fati' which contains some of the worst scripting in television history and is, consequently, loved by very easy to please Mulder/Scully shippers.
Available Track: The X-Files
Start music
Click here to visit the MIDI Warehouse © 2001 sculder_mully@yahoo.com
Get your own Free Home Page