Hello, all you web surfing... people. I'm SuperGeko, based on the infamous comic character Super Gecko. (What do you mean you haven't heard of him?) If you're like me, you're one of those guys who surfs around and sees all those neat-o sites out there with shiny colors and purty graphics, and you think aloud "Gee, I wish I had a website. But my pet lobster (Frank) can write better webpages than I can." Oh, c'mon, don't be so hard on yourself. Neither can I. I don't even know what I'm doing. But designing a website is easier than falling down a elevator shaft. Go to GeoCities (I think there's a "link" down there, whatever that is) to get one of your own. So if you have something important to tell me, such as how I can improve my site, email me at supergeko at aol.com. Even if you don't have something important to tell me, such as how many times you can hit yourself on the head with a baseball bat without passing out, go ahead and email me at supergeko at aol.com anyway.
Well, it has happened. The celestial bodies of our galaxy and many others beyond ours have aligned. The stars have come into perfect formation as foretold by Nostradamus himself 446 years ago. Your Ouija board said "BATRSL". Yes, for these instances point to one and only one thing. I actually got some pictures on my site. For a boring explanation of why I couldn't do this before and now I can, read on. If you have the attention span of bathroom tile like myself, then link away!
Come and see my drawrings!
Read about my futile attempt to better myself through HTML. Good for a laugh and a haugh.
This relic of a link is from the Bronze Age of this site, or, better known as the Age with No Ability to Upload Graphics. I was at odds about what to do with a website without pictures, so I thought to myself, "My, Jennifer Love Hewitt has large breasts." Wait, wait, wrong thought. "Why don't I put my self-created meaningless trivia test up here?!" And thus, I did. But beware; most questions are fairly old, and therefore corny and/or dumb.
Deranged Questions That Actually Have An Answer
Okay, listen to this. Let's say you were to go and check TMBG.org for the lyrics to one of your favorite songs, "SenSurround," by They Might Be Giants. Well, are you checking? Go ahead, I'll still be here... Well? GO!... Okay, did you read it? No, you didn't! Because it's NOT THERE! Appalling, huh. That's why, in dedication to the public and my own personal gain, my site has become the AS FAR AS I KNOW FIRST LISTING OF THE LYRICS TO SENSURROUND! So why are you sitting here reading this garbage? Go read and APPRECIATE! Oh yeah, one more thing. The only person who had checked the lyric sheet for authenticity is myself, so there may be about a one in 7 skillion chance that a word or two may be off. With proof or a good assertive argument I'll gladly change it.
Lyrics to SenSurround.
And for you 2.7 repeat visitors to this site, I've added an update to my "They Might Be Giants song lyrics that have not appeared on TMBG.org so I can only assume that I am the only one to have them" section of my website. From the album "Long Tall Weekend," the lyrics to the songs "She Thinks She's Edith Head," "Dark and Metric," and "Lullaby to Nightmares" are now up. I dropped them all into the Lyrics to SenSurround HTML because I don't have any neat MIDIs to play along with the new songs. (I also typed up "Certain People I Could name" and "Older" until I realized that they were already up on TMBG.org under a different album name. Excuse me while I go shoot myself in the foot.)
Here are some super links. Link to them.
Some super links .
I've been rattling around an idea lately, but I was reluctant to put it on my site because it would take too much effort for what it was worth. And it was dumb. But as of a few seconds ago, I decided that, while still being dumb, the idea was just barely worth the effort. It's a sort of parody of Larry King's "News and Views." But unlike other parodies from the likes of Norm MacDonald and Crow T. Robot, the views depicted here are not part of a comedy bit, and I have thought about their validity for upwards of seven seconds, maybe more. Read and become angered or confused.
Booze and Muse.
Fine. I can accept it. GameFAQs will take plenty of other garbage and put it on their site under their Metal Gear Solid 2:Sons of Liberty FAQ/guides section. I mean, a Menu Options FAQ? Whoever can't figure that out without consulting someone else shouldn't be allowed near their own fingernails, not to mention a computer. Shadow Mode walkthrough? Sure, that sounds helpful. Whenever I play Shadow Mode in MGS2:SOL, I'll think about calling up this guide and maybe checkin- wait, there is no such thing as Shadow Mode in the game! They made up a game setting and wrote a FAQ about it! And there it is, still sitting on GameFAQs! Real Weapons FAQ? A psycho gun nut down in Alabama tried to match every weapon in the game with the various rifles he has in his gun cabinet. Full Codec Text? Somebody just copied the text dump off of the disc and called it a FAQ! These things don't belong on GameFAQs. But, sadly, there they are. And now, drum roll please, my point: I wrote a FAQ for MGS2:SOL and have submitted it under their guidelines quite a while ago. They refuse to post it. It may not be the most useful guide ever written, but it sure deserves to be alongside these other claptraps that traipse around pretending to be FAQs. I mean, even mine took longer to create than the Full Codec Text.
Metal Gear Solid 2: Sons of Liberty - Snake and Otacon Super-Secret Handshake Unofficial In-Depth Guide
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One more thing, if there's anything that goes wrong with this site, (i.e. Dead links, missing graphics, irritating to the skin)
just repeat to yourself "It's just a site, I should really just relax." Uh, and you may want to e-mail me too. In fact, do e-mail me, because I have made the commitment to all of the web patrons out there to keep my site in working order for everyone who visits. If you e-mail me with a problem concerning my site, I guarantee it will be fixed by the morning after you send it. Yes, I am that dedicated. Wait, maybe I should explain a bit more. Send me notices of things wrong with my site which are easily rectified. Here are a few examples.
Acceptable: "The link to the Lara Croft graphic does not work."
Unacceptable: "Your site sucks. Make it gooder."
Acceptable: "Your SenSurround MIDI does not play."
Unacceptable: "I hate you."
And so forth...
Oh yeah, I don't endorse any of those advertisements up there either.
Please note; this website is optimized on computers that are mine.
Look at this ladies and gentlemen! My site is now critically acclaimed! I have gathered several quotes from celebrities and others in the public eye about what they think of my site. Enjoy. (Any similarity to any living person, living or dead, is strictly coin- what a second, hold on... All person/s represented on this page are, uh... I can't think of how to phrase this. Hold on, and I'll get back to you)
*"Who?" -Entertainment Weekly
*"I'm not saying it again, kid; get away from me or I'll call security!" -Bruce Willis
*"Yes! Your site is the greatest! Now please let me go, I have a wife and kids!" -Editor of "Wired" Magazine
*"What? What the @$#$ are you (&*& a %^&* @#$%^!!!" -Adam Sandler
*"Yeah, you know the- hey, hold on a second. What the- Hey! Hey, you! At my window! What do you think you're doing? Hey, get back here!" -Natalie Portman
*"According to your definition of "is", I did not have internet connections to Spanky's Porn Palace. Huh? You're not from Spanky's? Oh boy, I feel another investigation coming on..." -Bill Clinton
*"In...ter...net?" -Keanu Reeves
*"I'd say this site is worth about 17 cents."
-Bill Gates
(At this point I shouted "DEAL!", so this site is now owned by Microsoft.)
*"Get a haircut, hippy." -Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen
*"It's okay, but it could use more transsexual neo-Nazis who sleep with their illegitimate elderly barbers." -Jerry Springer
*"For the last time, my name isn't Helen Hunt." -Jodie Foster
Two's company, 
's a crowd.
Go ahead, sign my GuestBook, see if I care.
Here are some people who've already signed it. Follow their GuestBook Signing Examples.
Since GeoCities decided to screw over it's "OldSchool" members, click here to view my old GuestBook. Seems that simple HTML isn't good enough for you bastards anymore. Guuh...
Copyright 1997 supergeko at aol.com
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