Images of Willow dying assailed Angel and he could barely restrain himself
  from doing *something*. But he forced himself to stay where he was - his
  hands clenching and unclenching, his face stony with the need to control
  himself. Angel shared something of her agony in his helplessness.

  It seemed to last forever.

  Then suddenly it was silent.

  And if possible, that was even more terrifying.

  Angel approached the door slowly. He stood with his hand on the knob in
  fearful indecision. He metaphorically held his breath, straining to hear
  anything from within the room. It was eerily silent.

  The abrupt end of her cries, and the total silence from inside devastated
  Angel with its implications. He couldn't bring himself to open the door. He
  didn't want the proof of his fears before him. He didn't want go in and
  find whatever remained of Willow. He laid he forehead against the door in a
  tired gesture, already feeling the weight of grief.

  *~*~*~*

  As soon as Willow had swallowed the holy water, the sensation of it within
  her made her drop to the floor in convulsions. The burning agony was nearly
  indescribable. She shrieked uncontrollably, her whole being wracked in
  pain. Writhing, she had felt herself being turned inside out. Willow had
  blindly sought only a release, any release at all. Whatever coherent
  thoughts that were running through her mind were about the fact that surely
  by now she should have been dust.

  And then she had a moment of utter clarity. She would die. She would die if
  she didn't do what she had always done - separate herself from her demon.
  Mentally she grasped onto the very substance of her soul. It was her
  shield, her anchor. This is what made her unlike other vampires. And it
  would be what would allow her to survive what other vampires couldn't. She
  concentrated on disassociating the destruction of her demon from herself.
  She had to keep fighting. Fight as long as she could to not let her body
  and soul surrender.

  The pain which had been so absolute, the pain which seemed to be the only
  part of her existence, began to separate from her consciousness and it was
  as if she was feeling and experiencing the pain from a great distance.
  Finally after what felt like an eternity Willow felt the ebbing of the
  mindless pain. She opened her eyes which had been closed tight.

  < I survived! It worked?!?! > She felt a palpable difference within
  herself. She searched for that dark presence within her being which she
  normally tried to bury and hide from even herself. She had come to
  visualize her demon as being trapped in a cage, raging to get out and
  destroy her soul. But now the cage was empty, the struggle was over. Her
  demon had been destroyed! < It's gone. I can feel that it just isn't there
  anymore. > She lay there for a moment exalting in this miracle.

  Shaking, Willow didn't even attempt to pick herself off the floor. She was
  so tired. < I have to let Angel know it's alright. That I'm alright. >
  Just as she passed out, she called out Angel's name. It was as loud as she
  could manage. Although as injured as she was from the holy water, it was
  only a whisper.

  But it was loud enough.

  As he heard her faint call, outside the room Angel raised his head. With
  incredible joy he realized she was alive and he was galvanized into action.
  He threw open the door nearly taking it off its hinges in his hurry. Inside
  the room Willow lay in a crumpled heap. Seeing the state she was in, Angel
  was again filled with anxiety.

  Lying on the floor, her body looked as if it had just endured some horrific
  battle. Her lips were swollen from the burns of the holy water and blood
  streaked her face. The tears of blood which she had wept contrasted sharply
  with the chalky grey-white quality of her skin.

  He picked her up off the floor as gently as he could. Her body was limp and
  felt disturbingly frail in his arms. He set her on a couch and began to
  tend to her, wiping away at the blood on her face. At his touch on her
  cheeks, Willow stirred. She moaned softly. Her eyes fluttered open and
  weakly she tried to speak, her lips forming his name.

  "I'm right here," Angel smiled a beatific smile just for her.

  Seemingly satisfied in that knowledge, she closed her eyes again and this
  time submitted easily to blessed unconsciousness.

  *~*~*~*

  It took Willow nearly a month to fully recover from her ordeal. It was at
  least three full weeks of Angel mothering her until she scolded him for
  hovering over her constantly. He would grin, promise not to, then do it
  anyway. They both were giddy with relief and happiness. Willow was still a
  vampire, nothing would change that, but she had done the impossible. As
  Brother Lugo commented - it was indeed a miracle. And while Willow healed,
  she felt more contentment than she could ever have dreamed possible since
  leaving Sunnydale.

  At the end of the fourth week, when Willow felt she was finally back to
  full strength, she persuaded Angel to take a stroll through Rome. It was so
  lovely out that they ended up walking and walking until they reached a
  small piazza. The night was quiet and the piazza deserted, so they could
  hear the delicate splashing of water in a fountain at the center of it. The
  moon shone down on the fountain making the water glow silvery. The fountain
  was ringed by benches and they ended up sitting there just taking in the
  enchanting solitude of the evening.

  < This has to be one of the most romantic spots on earth. At least I'm here
  with a tall, dark, handsome, and charmingly sweet vampire. > She glanced at
  Angel with a smile playing about her lips at the whimsy of her thoughts.

  Angel returned her smile with one of his own rare smiles that transformed
  his whole face. And Willow suddenly felt her heart do the kind of flip-flop
  that Xander used to inspire. She turned away instantly, her eyes widened
  with shock. < I couldn't have possibly fallen for… > She sucked in her
  breath sharply. < …Angel? >

  Mistaking her gasp for a sigh Angel asked, "What are you thinking about?"

  Willow suddenly experienced blind panic. "Uh, nothing," she squeaked.

  He knew her too well. "You sighed. You sigh when you're thinking about
  something," he observed.

  < Oh no, oh no, oh no! > She needed time, time to process this abrupt
  revelation. But there was no way she could just bolt as she desperately
  wanted to. Her mind raced to come up with something. "I was thinking that
  I, ah, I just want walk a little bit more," she stuttered, desperately
  trying to act casually. "You know, its getting close to dawn. I could just
  meet you back at home. O.K?"

  "Well, o.k. I guess I'll see you at home." Angel agreed staring after her a
  little puzzled.

  Willow didn't look back to see. She walked not really seeing where she was
  going. < This is soooo not good! Why did this have to happen. I was just
  starting to feel I could be happy again. > A sarcastic voice responded in
  her head, < Yah and Angel had absolutely nothing to do with feeling that
  way. Uh huh, sure! >

  Since coming to Rome, she and Angel had become good friends. More than
  good
  friends, the best of friends. She had known, even before tonight, that she
  cared as deeply for Angel as anyone she had cared for in her entire life.
  Maybe it was inevitable that she fell in love with him, for no one
  understood or knew her better than he did now. They could talk to one
  another about everything. There was nothing that she couldn't tell him.

  < Except this, > she thought despondently.

  She thought about that one kiss that she had given him before drinking the
  holy water and blushed as she turned that memory over and over again,
  replaying it in her mind. She tried to recapture what his lips had felt
  like against hers. It had felt so right to do it at the time. Deep in her
  heart, she must have realized then that if she died, she wanted to have
  experienced his lips on hers at least that once. She must have known then
  that she loved him.

  She had to face facts though. Angel, like Xander, was in love with Buffy.
  Willow felt a wave of jealousy go through her. < Buffy. Oh god I'm jealous
  of my best friend… again. And this is even worse than with Xander! I have
  got to have some major masochist streak to keep falling in love with guys
  who are in love with her. >

  When she finally turned her footsteps homeward, she gave thought to how
  she
  wanted to deal with this. As with Xander, she would never have the courage
  to tell Angel of her feelings. And since Xander had never noticed her
  feelings for him, Willow had no reason to think that Angel would know that
  anything was wrong.

  *~*~*~*

  Angel knew there was something wrong. Something was bothering Willow.
  That
  was exceptionally obvious. He had immediately felt the distance that she
  had unwittingly put between them. But he didn't know what it was exactly
  that caused this, she had been avoiding him for a week. And although they
  were together now, since they were heading home after a visit with Brother
  Lugo, Angel hesitated bringing it up. It looked as if she had gone to great
  lengths to keep this to herself and if Willow wanted to speak to him about
  it she would. He didn't want to pressure her. So he stayed silent.

  Willow too was silent, deep in her own conflicted thoughts. Peaking over at
  him and drinking in his handsome face, all she wanted to do was throw
  herself at him. Sometimes she'd hear a wicked little voice in her head
  telling her that Buffy wasn't here and she was. She could make him happy,
  make him love her. But Xander had taught her that no matter how much you
  wished and longed for it, you couldn't change how another person felt.

  < I have to just put aside these stupid, inconvenient feelings I have about
  him. > Willow thought. She had been fairly good at hiding her feelings with
  Xander, but it was different with Angel. It was so much harder. And since
  there were less things to hide behind, Willow had begun to going out alone
  for 'walks' coming home at all hours. But now she decided to stop running
  away from Angel. < I can't take it anymore. I'm miserable! > she admitted
  to herself. Because despite everything, after only a week of this she was
  even more unhappy not being able to just be with him.

  They were almost back home when she finally worked up the courage to
  apologize to him for the way that she'd been acting because her blatant
  avoidance of him had to have hurt him. She stopped and turned to him.
  "Angel?" she started hesitantly.

  Angel turned to her and focused on her expressive face. It showed him such
  uncertainty and forlornness that he ached to reach out to her. He silently
  willed her to keep going, to talk to him. He nodded in encouragement.

  "Angel, I know that, uhm, this last week I've been a little, well,
  preoccupied. I just want you to know that I wasn't trying to…"

  Willow never got a chance to finish because they were suddenly surrounded
  by four vampires. A fifth vampire, their leader appeared. It was not only
  his distinct size and strength that made it obvious he was the leader.
  Rather he had an arrogant gleam in his eyes that, louder than any words,
  pronounced he was a force to be reckoned with.

  As he stepped forward out of the shadows, he said in a voice that sent
  shivers up Willow's spine, "Well Angelus, the rumors were true then. You
  are back. How long has it been old friend?"

  Willow felt Angel perceptibly tense up. She had the feeling that this
  particular vampire never had been anyone's friend. "Angel, who is he?"
  Willow asked quietly, her eyes never leaving the vampire who had spoken.

  Hearing her, the strange vampire answered her, "I am Dante. I'm surprised,
  and oh so hurt that he's never mentioned me. We used to be such pals." He
  said this with an odd twist of his lips that Willow decided was supposed to
  be a smile.

  Angel was uncertain of what Dante knew about his having regained his soul.
  He could maybe play real vampire for a while to see if it would get them
  out of this jam.
  But before Angel could say anything, it was as if Dante had been reading
  his mind.

  "Oh Angelus, I know all about you." Dante jeered as if disappointed. "You
  seemed to have gone soft, consorting with the slayer. Being a regular
  goody-two-shoes I hear. The rumors fly more fast and furious these days.
  And are much more accurately too. Technology you know," Dante grinned
  evilly. He then turned to Willow. "I've heard of you too my dear. The
  Unslayable one. Or so the Anointed One tells me."

  Just hearing of HIM made Willow bristle in fear and hate.

  "Leave her alone," Angel said through his teeth.

  Dante continued speaking to Willow as if he hadn't heard Angel. "But he
  didn't say how lovely you are. He'll be very happy with me to know that
  I've captured you."

  "Over my dead body," Angel hissed. His game face was on, having changed
  in
  murderous fury.

  "Yes, Angelus I'm getting to that," Dante laughed. "Kill him, but I need
  her alive," he ordered the other vampires. "She'll make a wonderful present
  to the Anointed One."

  "Don't bet on it," Willow snapped back. She might not be able to vamp out
  like other vampires but she certainly felt her body tighten into a coiled,
  unnatural tension.

  Willow and Angel stood back to back. They fought the group of four vampires
  as Dante stood as an observer in the background. It was the first real
  fight for Willow. She was having an easier time of it than Angel since
  their goal was to capture and not kill her. As she dusted the one she had
  been fighting, she glanced to see how Angel
  was faring and saw that he was in trouble.

  Angel had quickly killed one vampire before being overpowered by two
  others. One of the vampires holding a wicked looking knife had stabbed
  Angel, who was now slumping to the ground. Willow's breath caught in her
  throat as she saw the other one approach withdrawing a stake to finish
  Angel.

  Willow didn't think, just vaulting herself in front of Angel. She stood as
  if a lioness fiercely protecting her territory. Trying desperately to
  remember everything that Angel had ever taught her, she also drew on her
  own fear and rage.

  She kicked out at the vampire holding the stake, who dropped to the ground
  howling. Simultaneously she punched the knife-welding one, sending him
  staggering backward. Her unusual strength helped her as nothing else could,
  because she used the moment the force of her blows gave, to focus on using
  the stake against the first vampire. He had started to get up and instead
  landed on the ground again, this time as a pile of fine dust. Then, as if
  by instinct, Willow whirled around with unerring aim, staking the second
  vampire coming up from behind her. His knife clattered on the ground next
  to his ashes.

  But it was far from over. Abandoning his detachment from the fighting,
  Dante advanced on her with his eyes narrowed and intense. His game-face
  now
  in place, he sighed, "Stupid underlings. I guess I'll have to take care of
  this, myself." Then with a unearthly growl he flew at her.

  They fought furiously. As his every blow was parried or dodged by her,
  Dante said almost appreciatively, "Impressive. I've underestimated you."

  "I'm not really used to battle banter," Willow panted, "but I think this is
  where I say 'And that's the last thing you'll ever do'."

  The older vampire was experienced, but Willow's strength and her quickness
  were too much. Realizing that she was going to beat him, Dante didn't back
  down. It wasn't in his nature. Defiantly, he taunted her, "I won't be the
  last one to come for you, Unslayable One. Colin wants you too much. You
  WILL be taken to him eventually." Perceptive, Dante had seen her panic and
  protectiveness of Angel and pressed cruelly, "Nor will I be the last one to
  come after Angelus as long as he's with you. He's as good as dead."

  "No!" she cried out in denial and in a red haze of fury she plunged a stake
  into Dante's heart.

  Willow struggled to calm herself before turning to where Angel was still
  lying unconscious on the ground. She dropped down beside him and used her

  lap as a pillow for his head. "Angel? Angel, are you all right?" She
  caressed his face gently trying to wake him.

  Responding he said groggily, "We've got to get out of here." He struggled
  to get up.

  "Shhh, its o.k. They're all gone." Willow calmed him.

  Dazed he asked, "How….?"

  "I dusted the rest of them. Including Dante. Don't worry." She paused and
  then she continued in a voice that trembled, "When I saw you on the ground
  and thought that..that you would be..."

  The distress he discerned in her voice cleared the fog from his mind. "Hey,
  its o.k. I'm alright." He gave a lopsided smile wanting to add weight to
  his words.

  Love and relief overwhelmed Willow. She bent down and lingeringly kissed
  his forehead. Remembering herself, she pulled away embarrassed.

  When he felt able, Willow helped him up, supporting him all the way home.
  Once there, Willow silently dressed his wounds. Her hands trembled a little
  thinking how close to being destroyed he had come. He would be alright now
  of course, if not sore as hell.

  "You did a great job you know," Angel said trying to lighten the mood. He
  inwardly marveled that for all the fragility Willow projected, she was able
  to defeat a powerful vampire like Dante without batting an eyelash.

  "I had a good teacher." Willow put the finishing touches on the bandages.

  "It's a good thing too, I didn't even see the last one coming at me." Angel
  frowned slightly as he tested his wounds with the bandages on.

  "I seem to remember telling you sometime back about that blindside.
  Vampires don't fight fair you know Angel." Willow teased half-heartedly.

  "I'll have to remember that for next time."

  Willow shuddered.

  She followed him as he made his way gingerly to bed. Willow sat down next
  to him but Angel pulled her down to him, holding her as tightly as his
  wounds would allow. "When Dante said he was going to take you to the
  Anointed One, I lost it. I wish I had been the one to stake the bastard,"
  Angel growled.

  Even as she thrilled at his words and reveled in being close to him,
  Dante's last words echoed in her mind. < 'I won't be the last to come for
  you…Nor will I be the last one to come after Angelus as long as he's with
  you. He's as good as dead.' > She stared wide-eyed into the darkness, long
  after Angel fell asleep. < I won't let there be a next time, Angel. >

  *~*~*~*

  When Angel awoke there was no sign of Willow. Still stiff from his wounds,
  he nevertheless went through the silent house looking for her. When he saw
  an envelope on the mantle with his name on it, he experienced a kind of
  un-named dread. Angel picked it up and read the letter inside.
 

  Dear Angel,

  I have decided to leave Rome. By the time you get this letter I will have
  gone. You have to trust that I know what I'm doing. Please, don't worry
  about me. I couldn't face you since I know you would probably try to talk
  me out of any reasons I have for leaving. Almost a year ago you rescued me
  from Colin, saved me again when I tried to kill myself. You came with me to
  Rome to help me, to watch over me. Is there anything that I don't owe you?
  Without you Angel, I would have died or gone insane a long time ago. There
  is more than just gratitude though, because most importantly you have been
  my friend. We've grown so close and the last thing I'd ever want to do is
  hurt you. You sacrificed so much to be here for me and although you don't
  talk about her often, I know that you still love Buffy. Go to her now. I
  can't ever repay you for all you've done for me, can't ever show you how
  much you mean to me except by giving you the freedom to go where you're
  heart truly is.

  Love always,
  Willow