This is a message from a
former anti-Willow/Xander shipper:
Xander and Willow should
be together.
Here's the reason: As much
as Willow cares
about Oz, she does not love
him, and as a couple
they lack passion.
We've seen evidence of their
*caring* in several episodes.
Willow protects and supports
Oz in "Phases" and "AMAB." In
"Anne," despite being the
farthest away from Willow, Oz
manages to get to her fastest
when she is attacked by a vampire.
Oz seems to love and care
for Willow unconditionally. He
likes her in Eskimo outfits,
in "slutty" outfits, when she's
smart and when she's a talkative
spaz. He even admits that he
loves her. In the last scene
of “Phases” we find out the Oz is in
love with Willow, when he
says, "A werewolf in love" as she
walks away.
This unconditionality is
something that seems to be missing in
Willow. She always seems
to need to *find* reasons to like Oz.
She has to qualify her relationship
with him. For example,
"Surprise," when Buffy mentions
Oz, the best thing that Willow
can say is, 'I like his
hands." Admittedly this is early in the
relationship, but it is
indicative of her attitude in episodes to
come. In the third, season
her greatest endorsement of him seems
to be his mind. In "Anne,"
she is very upset that he flunked,
because his test scores
say that he is a genius. In “AMAB,” when
Oz mentions that he aced
his Biology final, she says,
"That's because you showed
up." In the most recent episode,
she brags about the fact
that he had the highest SAT score of any
person that ever flunked.
Willow also seems to like
him because of his association with a
band. There are many instances
where she shows or states how
cool she thinks his being
in a band is. Dating Oz, she is no longer
Geek-Hacker-Girl-with -Loser-Friends.
She becomes the
Girlfriend-of-a-Guy-in-a-Cool-Band.
She cares for Oz, because
of what can do and because
of what he does for her. I'm not
deriding the girl; this
is just how I see it.
In the beginning, I stated
that Oz and Willow seem to lack
passion; they do. We've
seen them kiss twice (In "Phases" and
"F,H&T), and neither
kiss was very extraordinary. The best
description would be "cute."
The most passionate kiss
that Willow has ever received on the
show was from Xander in
"Homecoming." Contrary to what she
feels for Oz, she loves
Xander with all of his shortcomings. She
knows him inside and out.
She loves him whether he is smart,
dumb, insensitive, sensitive,
a jerk or a sweetheart. She may get
angry at him, but she forgives
him his tresspasses and she doesn't
judge him. Ever.
Xander and Cordelia
Now, Xander and Cordy seem
to have an excess of passion.
Their relationship is primarily
based on sex, although they do
have tender feelings for
each other. These two could not
maintain a long distance
romance based on phone calls, e-mails
and letters. The physical
distance would be too great. This is
what happened in "Anne."
Cordy left over the summer, and when
she returned they had trouble
reconnecting. Apparently they had
no contact while she was
away. Most people call and write the
ones they love during a
separation. When they saw each other,
for the first time in several
months, neither had anything to say.
They didn't reconnect until
she fell on top of him, and they
kissed.
Another problem is that their
relationship is mainly based on
negatives. Cordy loves him
*despite* the fact that he
is a badly dressed dork,
who hangs out with dangerous people in
dangerous situations, makes
fun of her value system and mocks
her at every turn. Xander
likes Cordy *despite* the fact that she
is vapid, materialistic,
self-centered, tactless, and often bitchy.
Cordy, I think is genuinely
in love with Xander. She admits to
being in love with him in
"Homecoming" and even promises to
stay with his when she thinks
he has turned into a monster in "Go
Fish.” Also in "Band Candy,"
Cordelia separates her life as BX
(before Xander) and after
Xander. In dating Xander, Cordy has
sacrificed a great deal:
her uncontested reign as Queen C of
Sunnydale High, as well
a any sense of safety.
Xander on the other hand
has sacrificed nothing in his pursuit of
Cordelia. He has had to
deal with some blows to his ego, but he
is still dating one of the
most popular girls in school. I think that
Xander cares for Cordy,
but he does not love her. My
only definitive proof of
this is the fact that he has never said
anything about love and
his recent behavior toward Willow.
When he kissed Willow, it
was completely natural and
passionate. In the past,
Xander had been unable to love Willow
romantically, because in
his eyes she was an eternal child, the
little girl in pigtails
and footy pajamas that grew to be a gawky
girl that helped him with
his homework and loved him. When he
saw her in that dress he
realized that she was a desirable woman
for the first time. Willow
became the fantasy beloved-- beautiful,
smart and loving. She knows
everything about him and loves
every part of him, good
and bad. I must emphasize that the
friendly love that Xander
had felt for her in the past DID NOT
suddenly turn into romantic
love. Xander has *re-fallen* in love
with the *woman* that Willow
has become and has left the
childhood love behind forever.
A similar thing happened
to Willow. I think that between seasons
two and three she honestly
fell *out* of love with Xander. She
did her best to attach those
feelings to Oz, but to no avail. In the
dressing scene from "Homecoming"
she asks, "Since when were
you a gentleman?" Then she
sees him in his tux. She wasn't just
seeing a good looking guy
in a tux; she was *re-seeing* Xander.
She had fallen out of love
with her childhood crush, now she was
confronted with the man
of her dreams. In that moment she saw
Xander as a man and fell
in love with that man.
As much as I love Oz (and
I do love that guy-- he is such a
sweetie) and have come to
like Cordy, they deserve better than to
have lovers that don't love
them completely. I don't want either
one of them to get their
hearts broken, but it inevitable. Willow
and Xander's love won't
be denied for long.
Fini
God, that was exhausting!
Thanks for reading to the end. I had to
get that out.
Cydney
AARRGH!!! It would be less
painful if somebody'd STAKE ME!!! Xander's
still not good enough for
her! It's time for all true Willow / Oz
'Shippers to unite and save
our adorable little hacker from the evil
closet dwelling fiend that
is Xander!! I'd rather see her stake Dru
and run off to live vampily
ever after with Spike, than watch her get
together with hyena-boy!
At least they have the decency
to feel guilty afterwards. Hopefully,
it's just the start of a
short angsty bit and they'll get over it. If
they don't, I'll be dreaming
of Xander running into a very ticked-off
werewolf... And no Slayers
to save his sorry rear-end. Can you say
hyena flavored chew-toy?
I knew you could...
By Disciple of Moloch
This about xander/willow.
What greater love has a man than that he lay down
his life for a friend?
"He reaches up with his napkin
and gently wipes off her nose. He takes
much longer than he needs
to and looks into her eyes. He brushes his
hand against her cheek.
After another moment he starts to move in for
a kiss. She responds in
kind and tilts her head. They stop just short
of making contact
and linger there a moment. Xander finally begins to
pull back, and when he does
he sees a vampire standing on the other side
of the wall. Willow
notices his glance and looks, too. She screams and
jumps off of the wall as
Xander pulls her away from the vampire.
Xander: Willow, go!
He puts himself between her
and the vampire. She doesn't go, but
watches as he punches the
vampire in the face. The vampire isn't fazed. He
grabs Xander and tries to
bite. Xander struggles with him to keep from
being bitten. After a few
moments of wrestling a hand grabs the vampire by
the shoulder and pulls him
off of Xander. It's a girl, and she punches
the vampire in the face,
knees him in the crotch and flips him over onto
his back. She turns to Willow
and Xander."
- from the slayerfanfic.com's transcript of when she was bad
So here we see that he is
willing to fight a vampire *bare-handed* to protect
Willow. He knows this is
practically suicide. He has seen what vampires can do.Certain death.
"Buffy: (turns away) We,
we just have to think. Where would they have
taken them?
Xander: (vehemently) If they hurt Willow, I'll kill you."
- from the slayerfanc.com transcript of when she was bad
This is so you know that
he cares about Willow way more than he cares about
Buffy.
" Xander: (hops off of the
counter) So, I guess we're dance bound.
Cool. I think I can get
my mom's car, so I'm wheel man.
Buffy: I thought you were taking Willow.
Xander: Well, yeah, I'm gonna
take Willow, but I'm not gonna *take*
Willow. In the sense of
'take me'. See, with you we're three and
everybody's safe. Without
you, we're two.
Buffy: Ah, and we enter dateville. Romance, flowers...
Xander: Lips. "*here we see that he HAS THOUGH ABOUT IT*
Willow comes into the library,
but Xander's back is to the door so he
doesn't see her. Buffy pretends
not to notice her.
Buffy: Oh, come on. In all
the years you've know Willow, you've
never thought about her
lips?
Xander: Buffy, I love Willow...And
she's my best friend. Which makes
her not the kind of girl
who I think about her lips that much. *you notice the _AND_
conjunction right?*
Willow's smile fades to disappointment.
Xander: She's the kind of girl that... I'm best friends with.
Willow: Hey guys.
Xander: Willow! (goes to
her) Hi! We were just talkin' about happy
things.
-from slayerfanfic.com's transcript of inca mummy girl
When i saw the episode it
seemed to me he was afraid of becoming
romantically involved because
he worried that it would ruin their friendship.
"Ampata: This won't hurt!
Willow begins to choke. Ampata moves in to kiss her.
Xander: Let her go! (calmly
walks in) If you're gonna kiss anybody,
it should be me.
Ampata: Xander, we can be
together. (looks at Willow) Just... just
let me have this one.
Xander: That's never gonna happen.
Ampata: I must do it. I must
do it now! Or it is the end for me and
for us!
She tries to kiss Willow again, but Xander jumps in to stop her.
Xander: NO! (pulls Willow
away from her) You want life? You're gonna
have to take mine. Can you
do that?
Ampata looks into his eyes
as she considers. Her skin has mummified
up to her neck.
Ampata: Yes!
She grabs his neck and tries
to pull him to her as he holds her away
by her arms. Buffy kicks
at the lid of the coffin and gets it open.
Xander keeps holding Ampata
at bay and watches as she turns back into a
mummy. Buffy comes up behind
Ampata and pulls her off of Xander. His grip on
hers arms is so tight that
they are torn from their sockets. Xander
is freaked out and drops
them. Buffy looks at Ampata's body and drops
it, too. The head breaks
off of the body as it hits the floor. Buffy is
grossed out. Willow just
stares at what's left, then looks at Xander
and comes over to him. She
crouches down next to him, holding his arm and
rubbing his shoulder. He
looks up at her a moment, then back down at
his hands. Giles is out
of the coffin now, and he and Buffy collect them
to go. Giles looks back
briefly as they leave the exhibit.
-from slayerfanfic.com's transcript of inca mummy girl.
Again we see Xander lay down
his life for Willow.(I mean getting your life force
sucked out ...definate death
factor)
And like the quote at the beginning of this says...that is the greatest love...
I should add that i think
Willow is the right girl for Xander but I'm not
sure Xander is the right
guy for Willow. In fact i think she should keep Oz
_and_ take Xander away from
Cordelia (not that she doesn't already).
~pjmcgurk