He turned enough to look at me and offered his hand. I searched his face, his eyes were bright and blue just as Lucky's had always been, but without the spark of Lucky, without even a hint of recognition. I reached out to shake his hand, because I didn't know what else to do, and it felt so right."Are you all right, Miss...Elizabeth?" He asked, and I nearly hit the floor. The lilt in his voice when he said my name...Elizabeth...Lucky always had a special way of saying it. My heart and soul screamed inside, because I knew this was my Lucky, but it was not my Lucky...Something awful must have happened to him that night...
Emily walked around me to get the daily report she had done for Chase, a detailed account of our class activities. I bet she forgot to mention how freaked out Miss Elizabeth was seeing this child, a miniature of her lost love. And here was the real thing, three and a half years later...Staring at me like I was insane...and maybe I was.
"I'm...I'm just not feeling well today." I knew this man was my Lucky, and nothing and no one would ever convince me otherwise. Not even the blank look on his face, a look that clearly said he had no clue who I was, no memory of our time together, when we had been so much in love and so sure we would be together forever.
"I'm sorry to hear that." He reached up and patted my shoulder, then turned to take the paper from Emily. "Thank you."
Emily nodded. "We'll see you tomorrow. Have a good night, Chase."
He was walking away, walking just like Lucky. I was still feeling his hand, Lucky's hand, on my shoulder. I put my own hand where his had been, half expecting to feel the heat from his touch. I wanted to go after him, but Emily grabbed me around the waist and held me back. "Stop it."
"It's Lucky! That's Lucky and you're telling me to stop it! Let go! Let me go!" I screamed at her, struggling to break her hold on me. Loren was clinging to my neck, crying and trembling, not knowing what was going on. I closed my eyes and gave a deep sigh. "You think I'm crazy, don't you?"
"No. I think you're so in love with Lucky and you just can't let him go. But, Elizabeth, he's gone. You know that."
"No!" I screamed, my voice out of control. I was on the edge of tears myself, and Emily taking Loren from me didn't help any.
"Mr. Stevens looks a little like him, and Chase looks a little like Loren, but Elizabeth, lots of people have blue eyes and..."
"No!" I slapped my palms against my forehead. "Mr Stevens IS Lucky! He was just in this room. He is right out there in the parking lot putting Chase in a car seat right now!" and with that I flew out of the room.
"Elizabeth!" Emily ran to the door, but she couldn't leave the children in the room, she couldn't come after me.
I got to the front door just in time to see him slip into the driver's seat of his shiny red jeep. Lucky had always wanted a red jeep. He looked over his shoulder then pulled out of the parking space. My heart sank knowing I was too late to stop him, but my eyes followed him until he was out of sight. "Lucky!" I reached my hand out, like I was reaching for him, and when my knees gave out, I hit the pavement hard. "Lucky! Come back! Lucky!"
"Come on, girl." I heard the voice and knew it was Emily pulling me to my feet, fixing her hands under my arms and leading me back to the room, but in my mind it was Lucky, picking me up off the floor the night I got the call that my sister Sarah had died in an accident. Sarah and I had never been close, in fact we had been fighting over Lucky at the time, but I had never wanted her dead, and I took her death very hard. Lucky had helped me through that horrible blackness, and it was similar to the way I was feeling now.
"I've got you," Emily and Lucky's voices mixed in my head. I knew it was Emily, Lucky was gone, but...but...but I couldn't let him go. I would never let him go!
"Mommy!" Loren latched onto my leg. Dear God, what was I doing to my baby girl? Lucky's girl. I pulled away from Emily and picked her up. She fell against my shoulder, burying her face right where Lucky...Mr Stevens...had touched me.
"Shh, baby. Mama's here now. It's okay." I rubbed her back, a technique that calmed me as much as it calmed her.