YRU-Up, One Man's View

Two Decades of Sean
11/16/98


Seanablistic
Hello everyone in "sitting at your desk in a dark room" land, it's me…Sean, remember? Guess what…DO IT!!! Well wrong, it's almost my birthday. And it's the big two-oh for me. So wish me a happy birthday, as I am now well passed my prime. My prime being when I was 12. I really think that was when I had it going on. People seemed to like me, I didn't smell that bad and I didn't ever have to pay for food. Now I'm old and I'll never again be described as a "cutie" or called a "trooper." Long gone are the days of being followed around in stores by watchful clerks who pretend to straighten items, but always do so in the isle I'm in.

Now I've graduated to more serious suspicions. I go to an elementary school to pick up my brother and I'm now a kidnapper and child molester. I go to a dance club and lurk in the shadows, and I'm a rapist. I go to the docks at night with an ax and…well, you know what I'm talking about. I think I need to loiter more. That was a fun past time. When you didn't want to sit at home, you could go sit out side a store of some kind. It makes sense.

Birthday gifts really lost something the day you got a job that earned you more than 10 bucks a week. At that point you started buying stuff that you wanted yourself. The phrase, "wait till your birthday," was replaced with, "well you better start saving your money." So I bought what I want, when I wanted it, and my birthday and Christmas became times when my parents got me stuff I didn't want, but thought I did. I suppose I could always use a new shirt, but my torso can only be covered in so many ways. I still say toys are the perfect gift. They fit in that classic 10-dollar price range and if nothing else, they're usually posable.

So I suppose I'm not looking forward to this birthday that much but who am I to stand in the way of that Uber-powerful force that is the march of time? Time waits for no man, and it's a fool who waits for time. More sage-like wisdom from me, and it almost makes sense. Have a good one everybody and this round's on me, the birthday boy.

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