“God, Xander, I can’t believe we did five miles in twenty minutes!” she gasped, giggling.

“Yeah, and that’s even after you ran into that bush,” I reminded her. “That was hilarious. Look, you even still have a twig in your hair,” I pointed out, leaning over to pluck it out. She glared at me.

“Who was the one who tried to show off by closing his eyes and using no hands?” she retorted with a grin. “I don’t think I ever laughed so hard in my life as when you hit that curb and went flying!”

“You better stop it, Anya, you’re going to damage my fragile male ego,” I warned her.

“Oh, yeah, I’m really worried that I’ll hurt your feelings,” she laughed. I joined her and we laughed so hard that I thought my sides were going to split. Suddenly the phone rang and she reached for it. “Xander’s house,” she chirped into the phone. I watched her, and it was weird how it felt natural for her to answer my phone. Not for the first time, I thanked whatever God was watching over me for sending her into my life when I needed her. She tossed a quick glance at me and the smile dropped from her lips. “It’s Willow,” she whispered. I’m sure my face paled, and she reached over to grab my hand and squeeze it tightly. “Are you here?” she asked quizzically, holding her other hand over the receiver.

“Yeah.” I swallowed and motioned for the phone. “Might as well talk to her.” Anya handed it to me and I grasped it tightly. “Yeah?”

“Xander?” Willow’s voice asked uncertainly.

“That’s me,” I quipped weakly.

“Who answered the phone?” she inquired hesitantly.

“Anya.” I glanced over at her and saw the concern evident on her face. I nodded at her and she relaxed a little bit.

“I’m going outside,” she whispered. “Call me if you need me.” I nodded and returned my attention to Willow.

“So, you’ve already replaced me,” she deduced bitterly.

“Willow, please, let’s not fight,” I requested tiredly. I sighed and she noticed it.

“You were more than willing to fight with me until *she* came around,” Willow accused. “Now you’re complacent and you don’t even care what I have to say.”

“Willow, I *do* care,” I promised. “It’s just that I’m sick of fighting with you. I told you how I felt. I’m leaving it up to you to decide how things continue.”

She sighed and I felt a pang of guilt at how my tirades had really hurt her. “Xander, you told me that there was one thing you needed to hear me say if we were going to have a chance at all,” she began. I waited and she continued. “I know I’ve been pushing you away. I’ve been so scared that if I let you back in my life then I won’t be able to stay happy with Oz. I’m afraid that I won’t be able to keep away from you. I love you, Xander, and I know it, and Oz knows it. I’m just scared that my relationship with Oz will die if I get close to you again, because I know that I won’t be able to keep that closeness at a friendship level. So yeah, I know that it’s my fault we’re so strained right now. I’ve been doing everything I can to make sure that the time we spend together doesn’t have any friendliness in it. It’s not your fault that things between us are so bad. It’s mine.” She stopped and I could hear her sobbing. Tears filled my eyes and they spilled over as I murmured comforting words to her.

“Willow, it’s not all your fault,” I assured her. “I just wanted you to see that it’s not all mine, either.”

“Xander, I miss you so much,” she wept. “I love you and I miss you, and I want you back so bad, and it’s all my fault for choosing Oz and telling you that we can’t touch anymore, and it’s my fault for pushing you away. I just want things to be the way they were. I want you back in my life.”

I cried into the phone and she and I spent a few minutes crying together. “Willow, come over and talk to me,” I urged when we were more composed. She sniffled and asked about Anya. “I think Anya’ll understand,” I told her. “She knows how much I’ve been wanting for us to reconcile. A lot of our conversations have been about you and me. So, she knows. And I think she’ll be happy for me,” I added, believing it whole-heartedly. “She’s become a really good friend. She’s not you, but she’s been there for me when I really needed her.”

Willow hesitated, and I knew she didn’t really like that Anya and I had gotten so close. But her compassion won out, and she said, “Tell her thank you for me. I’m glad that she could give you comfort when I couldn’t.” I promised that her words would reach Anya’s ears. “So, I’ll be over in five minutes,” she allowed.

“I can’t wait to see you, Wills,” I told her sincerely. She sniffed again and said good-bye.

I hung up the phone and stuck my head outside. Anya was sitting on the front step, watching the people on the sidewalk, her head propped up in her hand. “So, she coming over?” she asked without even turning around.

I plopped down on the step beside her and nodded. “Yeah. We’re going to try and work things out. I think we have a real chance.”

Anya gave me a hug. “I’m glad,” she admitted. “You guys belong together. And it hurts to see you so unhappy. I hope things go all right.” We sat side by side in silence until Willow was visible. Anya stood up and I got up as well. “I’m gonna go home,” she informed me. “Give me a call later, okay?” she asked as she started down the walk.

“Promise. And, Anya?” She stopped and turned back. “Thanks, for being here for me. I needed it more than you know.”

“Not a problem, Xand.” Willow had gotten to my house by that time and Anya smiled at her. Willow smiled back weakly. “See ya.” And she turned around and left.

“So, when did you and Anya get so close?” she questioned, trying not to sound resentful and failing miserably.

“Since I needed a friend,” I replied simply. She winced. “Will, that wasn’t to hurt you. It was just the truth. I didn’t have your little support group. You had Oz and Buffy and Giles, and I didn’t really have anyone. So when Anya presented herself as a possible companion, I took the opportunity. She’s been a wonderful friend to me these last few days. I would have gone crazy without her.”

“I see,” she said quietly. She shifted her weight from foot to foot, and I took pity on her.

“Wanna go inside?” I asked, gesturing to the door. She nodded gratefully and I held it open for her. Following her inside, I took a deep breath. This was going to be the last chance I had to get my friend back. Would I be able to say the right things, would I hear what I needed to hear? Or was my lifelong friend gone for good? Closing the door behind me, I prepared to find out.