Dawson's Creek Series: Story #5
by: Courtney
Are you lost?
Do you find life turning out
Not quite the way you planned
Come around, stay a while
Well that's OK, that's alright
Couldn't get to sleep so talk about it
Let's talk about it right now
Here it comes on my head again
I guess I'm born to be the long lost friend, friend
Long lost friend
~ Long Lost, Better Than Ezra
Joey sits up in the bed and looks sadly around the room. It's been about ten minutes since Dawson left and now she has a chance to think about all that has taken place since last night. It was quite an eventful evening.
This morning, after he fixed her a breakfast of scrambled eggs and toast, Dawson had left to go meet Jen. He said they had plans for the day. This had disappointed Joey. She knew, however, that reality was bound to set back in sooner or later. She'd spent the night being taken care of by the person she loved most in the world and she had woken up in his arms. Lying there with him she had felt so safe, like nothing in the world could go wrong again . . .
'Too bad the sun had to come up and ruin things,' Joey laments. She just wishes the night could have gone on forever.
Sighing, Joey hoists her body up out of the bed. She walks into the bathroom and turns on the shower. Joey studies her reflection in the mirror as the room begins to fill with steam from the water. As she watches, her reflection fades more and more as the mirror covers in a steamy haze. She can't help but think how appropriate that is. The closer Dawson gets to Jen, the further she feels her world start to fade into the distance.
"Ugh!" she lets out a cry of frustration to her now barely visible reflection. She hates that she allows Dawson to have this power over her. She just seems to lose all control over her emotions when it comes to Dawson Leery. Unfortunately, it's always been that way and Joey doesn't foresee a change on the horizon anytime soon.
With a deep sigh, Joey sheds the T-shirt she had slept in the night before and retreats to the shower. If nothing else, maybe she can manage to escape reality for just a little while.
"Dawson, how's Joey doing?" he hears as he enters the front door of his house. Dawson makes his way into the kitchen where his mother and father are seated at the counter drinking coffee.
"You look tired, sweetheart," his mother comments. "Let me make you something to eat," she says and starts to get up.
"No, Mom, I'm fine," he protests as he motions for her to sit back down.
"Dawson, you need to eat breakfast," she replies.
"I had some toast at Joey's. I'm really not all that hungry," he says.
"Well, at least you have to drink some juice," she tells him. His mother gets up and takes a glass from the cabinet.
"Mom . . ." Dawson starts to protest again.
His father cuts him off. "You might as well sit down and drink it because she will never leave you alone until you do," he says with a smirk.
"I heard that Mitchell," she says as she reaches into the refrigerator to retrieve a carton of orange juice.
"Oops, busted," Mitch whispers to Dawson and Dawson grins and shakes his head. His mother returns to her seat, handing Dawson a large glass of juice. She gives Mitch a mock dirty look. "What? What did I say?" he asks.
"Sometimes I wonder who the teenager is in this house," she says with a smirk. Mitch gives her a sad puppy dog look and she can't help but grin. She kisses him gently and they smile at one another.
Dawson watches his parents. He's happy to see them getting along so well. It's been about a month since his dad found out about his mom's affair with Bob and this is the happiest he has seen them. For a while, Dawson had wondered if things would ever get back to normal but now it seems they are finally starting to.
"So, is Joey feeling better honey?" Gayle asks.
Dawson is pulled from his thoughts on his family by his mother's question. "Uh, yeah," he answers. "Her fever was almost normal when I left her this morning."
"Is she still there alone? Bessie and Bodi aren't home yet?" she asks.
"No, they aren't coming back until Wednesday," Dawson answers.
"Well, I'm not so sure it's a good idea for Joey to stay there all alone. I mean, she's sick. Not to mention that their phone is always going out and she's pretty far from the closest house . . . we are the closest in fact. I just don't like the idea of her there all alone," Gayle says.
"I left our cellular phone with her," Dawson says. "And I plan to go over tonight to check on her."
"All the same, I'd feel better if she stayed here for the next few days," Gayle says.
"I'm not so sure Joey is going to like that idea . . ." Dawson replies.
"No, your mother is right," Mitch says. "I have a few things to do this afternoon for my investors meeting tomorrow but as soon as I am finished you and I will drive over and pick Joey up. Call her and tell her to get her things together."
"Sure, okay," Dawson says.
"And, in the meantime, I'd say you might want to get a little more sleep. You look exhausted, son," Mitch says.
"Yeah, maybe I will," he replies. He downs the remainder of his orange juice and walks over to set the glass in the sink.
"Go rest honey, I'll wake you for lunch in a few hours," Gayle says.
"Thanks Mom," he says and kisses her cheek. She smiles and squeezes his hand gently. Dawson turns to leave the kitchen and starts for the stairs. When he is halfway upstairs he hears giggles from the kitchen and knows his parents are back to acting like 14 year olds. He smiles to himself and continues upstairs.
"Grams, has Dawson called?" Jen asks as she comes downstairs late that morning.
"No Jennifer, he has not. And, if you are going to insist on not going to church with me, the least you could do is get up before lunchtime."
"I've been up since 9 o'clock," she says. I got up right after you left for church. I had to finish my history paper. I was just in the shower for the last half-hour and I thought Dawson might have called to say how Joey was doing. I wanted to make sure she was okay."
"I'm sure Josephine is fine. I have a feeling that strong will of hers was more protection than the antibiotics anyway."
"Antibiotics?" Jen asks.
"Yes, I took some over to her this morning after services. And she looked fine to me. Almost no fever left and she was up and dressed. More than I can say for you," she comments as she looks at Jen's attire, a terrycloth bathrobe.
"Jeez! Fine, I'm going to get dressed. Forget you even saw me this morning," Jen says and turns to storm back up the stairs.
Mrs. Ryan watches her go without varying her expression. When she hears Jen's door slam shut overhead, she turns to the refrigerator to start preparing lunch.
Pacey knocks on the door and waits. No one answers. He knocks again. Still, there is no answer. Finally, he pushes open the door and sticks his head inside. "Joey?" he calls out. "Dawson? Anybody here?"
"Right here," Joey says from the kitchen.
Pacey is startled by this and nearly jumps out of his skin. "Jeez, don't ever do that!" he says.
"Sorry," Joey giggles. "I didn't realize you were so jumpy."
"Why didn't you answer the door?" Pacey asks as he walks further in and closes the door behind him. "I was worried something might have happened to you . . . like last night."
"I said come in but you didn't hear me I guess. I was just about to go to the door when you opened it," she explains.
"Hmm . . . well, how are you feeling? Any better?" he asks.
"Yeah, a lot better than yesterday, that's for sure," she says. "Jen's grandmother came by this morning and gave me some antibiotics to take. She said that would keep me from getting sick again."
"Mrs. Ryan? Man, she better watch it or she'll ruin that Wicked Witch of the East image she has going," Pacey smirks. "Which reminds me Dorothy, where is the Cowardly Lion this morning?"
"If you mean Dawson, then I am assuming he's with Glenda the Good Witch," she says, rolling her eyes.
"If he only had a brain . . ." Pacey says.
Joey looks at him and smiles slightly. They are standing in the doorway between the kitchen and the living room. She is leaning against the doorframe on one side and he is leaning against the opposite side. "Thanks," she says softly.
"I mean it, Dawson is so stupid for not seeing all that he has right in front of his eyes," Pacey says.
"Well, I think I'm beginning to realize how incredibly stupid that makes me, too," she replies and looks down at her feet with a forlorn expression.
"Jo . . ." Pacey says and moves closer to lay his hand on her shoulder.
"I'm an idiot, Pacey," she says as she starts to cry. "I can plainly see I am wasting my time and yet I still sit back and wait for him while he's off having a good time with his girlfriend." Pacey put his arm around her and Joey lays her head on his shoulder as she cries. Suddenly, she stops. She looks up at Pacey. "He's never going to love me," she says. It's like a realization. All of the sudden, she sees everything so clearly in her mind. And, just as suddenly, all of the fantasies she has had of a future with Dawson Leery seem to melt away.
"Joey, don't say that . . ."
"No, it's true. I can't keep lying to myself. I have to face the facts."
"He was here last night wasn't he? What time did he leave?"
Joey hesitates, but finally says, "After breakfast."
"See? He stayed all night, just like I figured," Pacey says.
"But, he left this morning to go see Jen. Don't you see Pacey? He spent last night making sure his *friend* was okay because he felt like he had to, but, this morning, he went running off to be with his *girlfriend* because that was where he really wanted to be. If I believe anything else I'll just be kidding myself. I'm through doing that."
She sniffles and pulls away from Pacey. As she wipes away the tears from her cheeks and composes herself, Pacey wonders if Dawson can see all that is quickly slipping out of his reach. If he doesn't get it very soon, Dawson could lose his chance to be with the girl he really belongs with. But, Pacey also has to admit that a small part of him hopes Dawson will miss that chance. Maybe then Pacey can have a chance of his own . . .
Dawson sits on his bed and stares up at the ceiling. He had come up here to sleep but for the last half-hour he hasn't even closed his eyes. He can't seem to get his mind off of last night. All he can think about is the look on Joey's face when he told her he was leaving to go and see Jen this morning.
'Why did you tell her that anyway? You knew it was a lie,' he thinks. The only explanation he can come up with is that he was scared. The feeling he had last night as he watched Joey sleeping in his arms . . . it had terrified him.
"She probably hates you now, you idiot," he mumbles.
"Dawson? Are you still up?" he hears from the doorway. He looks to see his mom enter the room.
"Mom . . . uh, yeah. I couldn't sleep," he says.
She walks over and sits beside him on the bed. She brushes the hair out of his eyes the same way she has since he was five years old. "What's the matter sweetheart?"
'Why do moms always know when something is wrong?' he wonders. This is the last thing he wants to discuss right now.
"Nothing . . . I'm fine. I'm just tired and I can't sleep. You know how that is sometimes."
"Sure . . ." she keeps watching him with concern though and he can tell she is unconvinced. "You know, you can always talk to me. I know sometimes it's easier to talk to your dad . . . I guess that's the drawback to being the only girl in this household. No one feels like they can confide in me. I'm here if you need me though."
"I know, I know that Mom. It's just . . . Ugh, I don't know! Life is so complicated! One minute I meet the perfect girl and my life starts to fall into place and then . . . then I suddenly realize that the perfect person was there all along and I was just too stupid to see it. And now . . . now I have the girl I thought I wanted but I really want the girl I could have had all along . . . I think. I don't know!" He stops babbling and looks at his mother. "I'm sorry, I'm not making any sense. Now you see why I didn't want to talk about it. I have no clue what is going on."
"No, I understand completely. This is about Joey," she says knowingly.
"Well . . ." Dawson says, trying to think of a way to avoid this confession but unable to come up with anything, "yeah."
"It's okay. She feels the same way," his mother assures him.
"I don't think so. Not after all this time, all the things I've done . . . how could her feelings be the same? Anyway, I don't deserve it if they are."
"Dawson, things will work out. They always do. Just look at your father and I. Did you ever think things would be the same with us after what I did? And now he's finally forgiving me and we can get past all this. It'll happen for you and Joey. Just give it time."
"That's just it," he tells her. "I'm not sure I want it to happen. I mean, what will that mean? How can we still be best friends if we're . . ." he sighs. "I don't know what I want. I want Joey, but I don't. I like Jen, but then I see Joey with Pacey and it makes me crazy! And last night she fell asleep in my arms and . . . I've never felt like that before."
Gayle Leery smiles. Dawson may not know it yet, but she can see this picture very clearly. Her son is falling in love. She's suspected this for a while but she has always told herself he was too young or that Joey was too good a friend to him. But, now, she realizes how perfect it really is. "Dawson, you are going to be just fine. Confusion is part of growing up. And, if I know my son, and I know that I do, he will make the right decision in the end." She gets up and leans down to plant a kiss on his forehead. "Get some sleep honey. I'll call Joey."
"Thanks Mom," he says. She turns and starts to leave. "Mom, wait . . ." he calls and she turns back towards him. "Thanks for listening. I'm glad we talked about this. I love you . . . I don't say that enough."
She smiles broadly. "I love you, too." With that, she turns to go and Dawson closes his eyes to try and sleep.
Jen picks at the casserole on her plate but doesn't eat a bite. She has no appetite. All day she has been waiting to hear from Dawson, but all day the phone has rung only once and it was Grams friend from church calling about some prayer meeting that week.
"Jennifer, you need to eat," Mrs. Ryan says.
"I'm not hungry," she says.
"Are you getting sick?" she asks, reaching over to feel Jen's forehead.
Jen pulls away. "I'm fine. I'm not sick. I'm just not hungry. Is that allowed?" she snaps.
"Watch your tongue young lady!"
"Sorry," Jen mumbles and goes back to picking at the casserole. "May I please be excused?" she finally asks.
Mrs. Ryan sighs. "Well, I don't see why not."
Jen gets up and heads up the stairs. She walks into her room and goes over to the window to look across to Dawson's house. The curtains are blowing in his window but she can't see anyone and the place looks quiet enough. She wonders if he's home. She thinks about calling him but decides against it. If he wants to talk to her, he'll call. Until then, she'll just have to try and think about something else. That, it seems, will be the hardest part of all.
"Sure . . . okay . . . but I . . . yes ma'am. Okay, I'll see you then . . . bye." Joey sighs deeply as she cradles the phone.
Pacey looks at her questioningly, finally inquiring, "Who was that?"
"Mrs. Leery," she replies with a decided lack of enthusiasm in her voice.
"She's coming over to check on you?" he asks, trying to determine why the conversation has displeased her so much.
"No, worse . . . *Mr.* Leery is coming," she says.
"Oh . . . and that's bad because . . ." Pacey presses.
"Because he's not coming to check on me, he's coming to pick me up," Joey says.
"You're going somewhere?" Pacey asks.
"Apparently," she says in a miserable tone as she flops down onto the couch with a sulking expression. Pacey is still giving her a curious look so she explains further. "Mrs. Leery said she didn't want me staying her alone since I'm sick and since it's so far from the closest house so . . ."
"So you're staying at Dawson's?"
"Yeah . . . until Wednesday when Bessie and Bodi get back," she says. "Ugh! This is awful!" Joey laments. "Why didn't I just lie and say . . . say . . . hell, I don't know, something else. There has to be a way out of this."
"Not anymore there isn't. You just said you'd go. What's the big deal anyway? You've probably spent as many nights at that house as you have at this one over the years," Pacey says.
"Yeah, but . . . I don't know how ready I am to spend four days watching Dawson and Jen together every waking moment." She sighs, "Why does stuff like this always happen to me Pace?"
"Calm down," he says as he sits beside her on the couch. "Things could be worse. Besides, I give it two hours before all the awkwardness you keep envisioning melts away and you and Dawson are having a terrific time."
"How do you figure?" she wonders.
"Because, that's the kind of friends you and Dawson are. You never stay mad at each other or hurt by one another for very long. I always wished I had a friend like that. Watching you two all these years has shown me what real friendship is all about."
Joey smiles. "That's sweet Pace," she says.
"Shh, don't tell anyone. I have a reputation to protect," he smirks.
"Oh course. As far as anyone else is concerned you are still a first class jerk . . ." Joey looks up at him and grins. "But I know better," she says.
Pacey smiles back at her. He feels his heart skip a beat and he wants to take her in his arms and kiss her at that very moment but he doesn't dare. He's sure that would be a huge mistake. Joey loves Dawson, no matter how much she despises that fact. For the moment, all Pacey can do is wait.
Dawson wakes up and looks at the clock beside his bed. Seeing that it is nearly 4 o'clock in the afternoon, he jumps out of bed and starts downstairs. His mom was supposed to wake him a few hours ago.
"Mom?" he calls from the stairway.
"In here," Gayle Leery calls from the kitchen. She is standing at the counter layering long, flat noodles in the lasagna she is preparing for dinner.
"Hey," he says as he walks in, "I thought you were going to wake me up in a few hours."
"I was but, well, you just looked so peaceful and I knew it took you a while to get to sleep and that you needed to rest so . . ."
"So you pulled a mom on me. I see," he laughs. "Where's Dad anyway? We should probably go if we want to pick Joey up before dinner."
"Dad left already. I was actually just about to come wake you up. Joey should be here in about fifteen minutes," his mother tells him.
"Oh . . . well, okay. What did she say when you called her? Was she as against this whole idea as I told you she would be?"
"Not at all," Gayle says. "She simply said okay and that was that."
"I'll just bet," Dawson says, rolling his eyes as he plucks a carrot from a bowl on the counter and begins munching on it. "Joey didn't protest because you probably didn't let her get a word in edgewise. I know you, Mom."
She gives him a look and laughs. "Hey, while you're over there feasting," she says indicating the carrot in his hand, "why don't you start on the salad. Everything is washed, just cut the vegetables and tear the lettuce into that bowl." She points to a large, wooden salad bowl sitting on the counter nearby.
"Okay," Dawson says between crunches and quickly finishes the carrot. Then he washes his hands and gets started tearing lettuce into the designated bowl. "So," he says to his mother as they are both busy preparing food, "I guess that we will have to clear out the guest room for Joey. Dad has all his stuff for the restaurant spread out in there."
"Yeah, I know," she says as she sprinkles a handful of mozzarella cheese onto to dish before her. "The only thing is, his investors meeting is tomorrow and you know how he is. All of that stuff looks like a mess to us but somewhere in all that your father has a method to the madness. I'm afraid if we move everything out now he might not be able to find everything for tomorrow. This restaurant is so important to him . . . I'd hate for anything to go wrong."
"Hmm . . . I guess I see your point," Dawson says. "Well, it's no big deal really. Joey can just sleep in my room. It's not like she hasn't spent the night a thousand times anyway. I mean, I don't think she's ever slept in that guest room before."
"Well, she might still be sick. We don't really know that she's not contagious," his mother points out.
"I was with her all night last night," he reminds her. "Anything she's spreading around I'm sure I've already got it if I am going to get it. Besides, she was feeling much better today. Mrs. Ryan seemed to think yesterday that she most likely had a 24-hour bug. I'm sure it'll be fine," he assures his mother. Everything he's saying to her is true, but it's not the whole truth. He didn't want to mention it, but the truth of the matter is that he wants Joey in his room. He feels like they need to talk. He's finally starting to realize his feelings for her are changing and he wants them to get everything out in the open. There is nothing in the world that bothers Dawson more than keeping things from Joey. It seems to eat him alive when they have secrets.
His mother nods, "Okay, I suppose you're right." However, when Dawson turns back to the salad, her eyes linger on him, wondering if letting her 15-year-old son spend the night with the 15-year-old girl she is sure he will end up involved with someday is such a good idea. She decides, though, that for now at least everything will be fine. She turns back and picks up the lasagna pan to place it in the oven and the two of them continue preparing dinner in relative silence.
Joey hears a horn honk out front and peeks out the curtains. It's no surprise when she sees who the visitor is. It's just who she expected it to be, Mitch Leery. She sighs as she turns back to the couch where Pacey is still sitting. "It's him," she informs him.
"Well, do you have everything you need?" Pacey asks.
"Yep," she replies and indicates the suitcase on the floor beside the chair. "It's all in there." She walks over to the suitcase and starts to lift it but Pacey lifts it before she has the chance.
"I got it," he insists. Joey shrugs and nods and Pacey walks out to put the suitcase in the car. Joey locks the door and follows him.
"Hey kids, hop in," Mitch Leery says as they approach. "Pace, I didn't know you were over here. That's great, now you can join us for dinner. Gayle is making her famous lasagna," he grins.
"I don't want to intrude," Pacey says.
"Nonsense . . . get in the car," Mitch says and Pacey obliges by hopping into the back seat. Joey gets up front and after everyone is buckled up they head back to the Leery house.
"Grams? Can I talk to you?" Jen asks as she appears in the doorway to her grandmother's sewing room. Mrs. Ryan is busy sewing what seems to be a set of curtains, but as soon as she hears her granddaughter's voice she looks up in surprise.
"So you're talking to me now?" she asks.
Jen stares down at her feet and remains silent for a moment. "Yeah . . . I wanted to apologize."
Mrs. Ryan looks truly shocked now. "Oh?" is all she can think to respond.
"Yeah . . . I mean, yes ma'am. I was a real pain today . . . it's not your fault and I'm sorry I snapped at you. It's just . . ."
Her grandmother looks at her and can see that Jen is getting upset. She stands up from the sewing machine and walks to the doorway. Taking Jen's hand in hers, she walks to the couch and they sit down together. "Tell me what's bothering you Jennifer," she says gently.
"I . . . Grams, I can't," Jen replies woefully.
"Jennifer . . ." she thinks for a moment then smiles softly. "Do you remember when you were a little girl and you would spend the summer with me sometimes? I remember the summer you turned ten, you came up here for three weeks and stayed with me. We had the best time. Do you remember?"
Jen looks up and nods. "Sure, I remember."
"We used to talk then," her grandmother says. "You could tell me anything. And we spent the entire three weeks together. What happened to that little girl?"
Jen frowns and her eyes fill with tears that she tries to hold back. "That little girl died in New York. She went home that summer and started changing. Two years later that little girl was completely gone and she had been replaced by the confused, screwed up person that you see before you. I'm never going to be that little girl again Grams. She stopped existing after that summer."
"Now, I don't believe that dear. I still see that little girl sometimes when I look into those eyes. Yes, you try to act like a grown up and like you don't need me or anyone else but I know better. You're still the same sweet little girl who used to sit and let me braid her hair. The same child that sat on the front porch with me and just talked. You just think she's gone, but I know she's just well hidden at times."
"I hate to disappoint you, Grams, but I disagree. I can't imagine ever being as innocent and trusting of anything in this world as I was when I was ten years old."
"Oh, of course not. I would never expect that Jennifer. All I'm saying is that we used to have a very good relationship. I just want us to get back there." Mrs. Ryan smiles, maybe the first genuine smile she has given Jen since the first day she arrived. Suddenly, without warning, all Jen wants to do is be ten years old again. She can't think of anything she'd rather do than talk to her grandmother about horses and slumber parties and all the things that used to seem so important once upon a time.
The tears in Jen's eyes finally win out and spill onto her pale cheeks. "I've missed you Grams," she says and hugs her grandmother tightly. Her grandmother, though slightly surprised by the sudden outpouring of emotion, accepts the hug with welcoming arms and holds her granddaughter close.
"Jennifer, I understand. It's hard to grow up. I've always loved you, that's something that will never change," Mrs. Ryan says.
Jen sits up and wipes her eyes. Nodding, she says, "There are still things we won't agree on, but it'd make things a lot easier if we could try and be friends."
"I'll make you a deal," Mrs. Ryan says.
"What's that?" she asks curiously.
"I'll try to accept the things we disagree on if you will at least try and accept a few of my beliefs."
"What exactly does 'accepting your beliefs' entail?" Jen asks in a weary tone.
"Just what you are afraid of my dear, church." Jen starts to protest but Mrs. Ryan raises a hand to silence her. "Now, hear me out. I'll be more . . . flexible on some of the things we don't see eye to eye on. Like your friend Dawson for instance . . . if you will agree to come with me to services, say, every other week?"
"I don't know . . ." Jen replies.
"You won't have to enjoy it . . . you won't even have to believe a word that is said there. All I ask is that you give it a try. It can't hurt. I'm not asking you to join the church, just to accompany me once in a while and give it a chance. If after four or five visits you still feel like the church has nothing to offer you and that you are just wasting your time, well . . . well, I can't say I'll be happy about it but I will accept your decision. Do we have a deal?" she asks.
"Well . . . okay, I suppose. But if I do decide I don't want to go back after four Sundays then you can't go back on your word. You have to accept it."
"You have my word," Mrs. Ryan says.
"Okay," Jen smiles slightly. She is surprised how good it makes her feel just to know she has reached even this small compromise with her grandmother. It feels like they have just lessened the gap between them immensely.
"So, do you still want to talk about whatever it was that was bothering you today?" she asks. Jen's frown returns and she shrugs her shoulders. "It's about that Leery boy isn't it?"
"Dawson, his name is Dawson," Jen says giving her a look.
"I'm sorry, I apologize, Dawson."
"Yeah, it sort of is," Jen says.
"Do you feel like discussing it?"
"Well, I wouldn't mind . . . but only if you want to listen. I know how you feel about Dawson . . ."
"Jennifer, if you are having a problem, whether it involves Dawson or any other boy for that matter, I am always willing to listen if you need to talk. And I don't really dislike Dawson. I just don't want to see you get hurt, that's all."
"Then you're too late," she replies.
"What do you mean?"
"Well, it's nothing Dawson has done purposely, but I think he may be losing interest in our relationship."
"What makes you think that?"
"I don't know . . . I guess it's my own fault. I've seen it pretty much since the day I met him. I guess I just ignored it because I didn't want to believe it."
"Saw what? Ignored what?" Mrs. Ryan asks.
"Joey . . . Dawson is in love with her," Jen says. She looks to her grandmother for a reaction but doesn't get much of one. "Why are you so calm about that?"
"Well, I can't say I'm too surprised by that. Josephine Potter was the main reason I didn't want you involved with Dawson in the first place. Not that she's not a nice girl; she is . . . especially considering that family she's had to contend with. It's just, she has been going over to that house for Lord knows how many years and I've watched all of those children grow up and . . . well, it's hard to come between two childhood sweethearts. Those two have always had a connection that even I could distinguish. I guess all along I knew this would eventually happen and I just didn't want you mixed up in it because I knew you'd end up being the one hurt."
"Yeah, I guess that makes sense now that you say it. I almost wish I'd listened," Jen says.
"Almost huh?" her grandmother says.
"Yeah, I guess I don't really regret it. Joey and Dawson are both good friends to me . . . and so is Pacey. I'd hate to have not met them. I just wish I hadn't gotten involved with Dawson. He's a really great guy and I find myself liking him a lot . . . more than I had originally planned to. But, I know he's not going to fall in love with me and I won't fall in love with him because I know his heart is already taken."
"But it's still hard, I know," Mrs. Ryan says.
"Yeah, it is," Jen says softly.
Mrs. Ryan looks at her granddaughter and she can't help but think how much that little girl Jen once was is showing through at this very moment. She is much less concerned about her own happiness with her boyfriend than she is that he eventually find his way to the girl he is meant to be with. 'She's a good girl,' Mrs. Ryan thinks. She reaches over to hug Jen and Jen falls willingly into her grandmother's embrace.
"We're back," Mitch calls as he walks in the front door of his home.
Gayle sticks her head out of the kitchen and grins. "Hi Joey, hi Pacey," she says.
"Hi Mrs. Leery," Joey responds with a smile.
"Hey," Pacey says.
"Where's Dawson, is he up yet?" Mitch asks his wife.
"Yep, he just finished making the salad," she says as she wipes her hands on a dishtowel. "He went upstairs to change for dinner. The lasagna should be done in about twenty minutes or so." She turns to Pacey and says, "I hope you're staying for dinner. I made plenty of food, you're more than welcome."
"Well, if you're sure . . ." he says.
"Of course!" Gayle says. "It's settled, you're staying. Joey, I'm afraid the guest room is covered up in papers right now so it looks like you'll be bunking with Dawson if that's okay," she says as she looks at the girl.
"Uh, sure, no problem," Joey says. Pacey tries not to look uncomfortable with this news.
"Well, if the two of you want to take Joey's things upstairs, you can wash up for dinner in the hall bathroom. I'm sure you both know you're way around," she grins.
"Yes ma'am, thank you," Joey says. Pacey smiles at the Leerys and hoists up Joey's suitcase to follow her up the stairs.
The two walk down the hall and, after Gayle and Mitch Leery have retreated back to the kitchen, Pacey whispers, "Are you okay with this?"
"Okay with what?" Joey asks.
"You know, staying with Dawson . . . in his room," Pacey says.
"Of course . . . do you know how many times I've slept in that bed? It's not a big deal."
"Well, you sure didn't seem very thrilled about even coming over here a few hours ago," he replies.
"I know . . . I guess I just realized that I need to get over this whole Dawson thing. It's time to grow up and I'm beginning today," she says.
"Really?" Pacey sounds surprised. "Well, I think that's a good thing Jo, I really do."
She smiles and is about to say something back when the door to Dawson's room opens. He looks up at his friends and smiles. "Oh, hey guys. What's up?"
"Just dropping by for a visit at Hotel Leery," Joey says indicating the suitcase Pacey is holding.
"Yeah, you know how my mom is. She tends to worry. Anyway, I think she's right this time. It's not such a good idea for you to be there all alone." Joey nods.
"Excuse me, man holding a slightly heavy suitcase here," Pacey says.
"Oh, sorry," Dawson says and steps aside for his friend to carry the bag into his room. He and Joey follow behind him. "So, I guess Mom told you about the guest room being, uh, inaccessible at the moment?"
"Yeah, she did. You're dad is still working on the restaurant thing huh? Any clue when that's getting off the ground?" Joey asks.
"Well, he's meeting with the investors in Boston tomorrow afternoon so it could be pretty soon. He's hoping so at least," Dawson replies.
"Well, we better wash up for dinner. Your mom said it was almost ready," Joey says.
"You staying Pace?"
"Your mom and dad insisted," Joey tells him.
"Yeah, well, you know how hard it is for people to resist the Witter charm," Pacey says.
"Ha, yeah, right," Dawson says.
"Hey, you're just jealous. You don't have the touch. Well, I'd help you out my friend but I'm afraid it's just a God given talent. Sadly, I cannot teach it, I just have to share it with the women of the world." Pacey grins and winks at Joey who immediately rolls her eyes.
"*Please* get out of here!" Joey groans.
"Why do we talk to him anyway?" Dawson teases.
"Who knows!" Joey says.
"Jeez, some friends! Well, I'm going to help your parents get the table set. They like me," Pacey says with a smirk and he turns to go down the hall to the bathroom and wash his hands.
"What a nut!" Dawson laughs after Pacey is gone.
"Yeah, he's pretty crazy," Joey agrees with a giggle.
"So, what was he doing over at your house anyway? Checking up?"
"Basically," Joey says. "You know, he's getting as bad as you Dawson."
"Bad? Hey, I take offense to that," Dawson says.
Joey smiles at him and says, "Well, you know as annoying as it is to have you two watching over me sometimes, I can't imagine what it would be like without it."
Dawson smiles at this. He has the urge at that moment to confide to Joey all of the things he has been thinking about their relationship since the previous evening. However, with Pacey and his parents right downstairs waiting on them, he decides it is a discussion better saved for another time. "Come on, let's go wash up for dinner," he says to her. Joey nods and the two leave his room, putting a hold on the conversation that is ultimately going to be inevitable.
The group has a good dinner, everyone laughing and joking and catching up on recent events in each of their lives. By 9 o'clock, Pacey has headed home, Dawson's parents have headed to bed, and Dawson and Joey are lying side by side on his bed watching 'Sleepless in Seattle'.
"You know, this is the last time I let you pick the movie," Dawson complains.
"What? You don't like this movie?" Joey asks.
"Yeah, it okay. It's just . . . I don't know, it's not much of a love story. I mean, the two characters spend the entire movie apart and then all of the sudden, right before the credits roll, they meet and fall madly in love without so much as a first date. It just seems like too much to expect the viewer to swallow, that's all."
"It's called fate, Dawson," Joey says.
"No, it's called Hollywood," he counters.
"Yeah . . . but don't you believe in that just a little? Isn't it just possible that there's one person out there for everyone? That all you have to do is wait until your paths cross?" she asks.
Dawson looks at her and starts to tell her that, yes, he believes that and yes, he thinks it is all a matter of time and that he believes he has found that person already . . . but, how can he do that? He saw how she and Pacey were acting at dinner. It wasn't extremely obvious, but Dawson knew they were growing closer. And Joey seemed more distant with him today. He had to worry that maybe their time had come and gone and he had missed it. When she wanted him, he was too blind to see it. And, now that he was getting ready to give things a try, Joey had gotten over her feelings and moved on. With all of these unanswered questions floating around, Dawson simply sighs and says, "I don't know Joey. I just don't know."
May 11, 1998
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