ER: Doug and Carol Series

Story #40

Things Yet To Come

by: Courtney

Carol tosses and turns in the bed. She groans and flops over onto the pillow. It's nearly 4am and she has been struggling to maintain her fitful sleep all night. She had finally fallen asleep about an hour ago but still she is far from peaceful.

Doug walks in from the night shift just as the clock changes to 3:58am. He looks at Carol as she flails about in her sleep and a smile plays at his lips. Even in her frazzled state, she still looks very beautiful. He quietly undresses and, in only his boxer shorts, slips into bed beside her. Carol tosses in her sleep again but doesn't wake up.

She isn't getting very much rest, Doug can see that. He reaches over to caress her cheek with the back of his index finger. She turns her head to face him but remains in her semiconscious state. He scoots closer and gently takes her in his arms. She instantly snuggles close to him and finally seems to be at ease. Within moments Carol is sleeping soundly, no longer tossing and turning but peacefully resting against Doug's chest. He looks down at her and smiles softly. He plants a sweet kiss against the pale porcelain skin of her cheek and closes his eyes to fall asleep as well.

"Good morning," Doug says cheerfully as Carol walks into the kitchen.

She yawns and replies, "Good morning. You're up pretty early for a guy who worked the graveyard last night," she comments. It's about 11o'clock in the morning.

"I caught a nap at work," he offers as an explanation. "Did you sleep well?" he asks as he hands her a fresh cup of coffee.

She smiles appreciatively and sips the hot coffee. "Not at first, but after I finally got to sleep I felt better. I was pretty restless last night, though. It took me a while to get settled."

Doug smiles but doesn't say anything, he just sips his coffee.

Carol looks at his coy grin and returns the look. "I guess I don't sleep too well without you," she admits.

Doug nods and sets down his coffee cup. "I'm the same way. When you work all night I barely sleep at all and then you walk in and crawl in bed beside me and I'm out like a light."

"I guess we're accustomed to each other," Carol grins.

"Well, don't go getting accustomed to anyone else," he warns playfully.

"So, was Mark at work last night?" Carol asks with a concerned look.

Doug nods sadly. "He looked awful. He's really taking this hard."

"I feel just terrible for him. I mean, like he didn't have enough to worry about."

"Well, you know what he told Nina don't you?" Doug asks.

"No, what?" Carol asks curiously.

"She asked him if she was the love of his life and he said no. He told her Susan was."

Carol's eyes grow wide and her jaw drops open. "He *told* her that?" she says incredulously.

"Hey, she asked," Doug replies.

"Yeah, but still . . ."

"Think about it, if it were you wouldn't you want the truth?"

Carol thinks a moment then nods. "Yeah, I suppose I would. So, Dr. Ross, who's the love of your life?" she asks with a grin.

Doug grins back and stands up to take her hand. As he leads her upstairs he whispers, "Come on, I'll show you."

"Bax, come on, you always get to be the dog," Charlie complains. She, Bax, Josh, and Michelle are sitting around the kitchen table at Bax's Uncle Will's house playing Monopoly.

"That's because he's lucky," Bax explains as he snatches up the playing piece.

"Well, considering the number of times I've kicked your butt in this game, I guess you can use all the luck you can get," she laughs.

"Ha, ha, you are *so* hilarious!" he says sarcastically.

"Okay Char, pick a piece," Michelle says. She is sitting on one side of the table beside to Bax and Charlie is on the other side next to Josh.

"Alright, I'll be the hat," Charlie concedes. They pass out the play money and begin the game.

"You know, we could probably have found something a little more exciting to do with our Saturday afternoon," Josh points out after they have been playing for about an hour.

"You're just pissed because you landed on Park Place and I own it," Charlie kids him. She laughs and he bends down to kiss her. "Don't think that's going to get you a rent reduction," she says as their lips part.

"Jeez, what a tyrant!" he laughs.

"At least I'm not a slum lord," she teases.

"Hey, those hotels on Mediterranean are cockroch-free thank you," Josh says of his property.

"I'll just bet," Charlie says while rolling her eyes and giggling.

"You guys hungry?" Bax asks as he gets up to look into the refrigerator. "Uncle Will left us some cold pizza and fried chicken. What sounds good?"

"All of the above," Josh says as he gets up to join Bax in front of the refrigerator.

"Sounds like a plan," Bax agrees and begins removing food and handing it to Josh. The girls get up to fix some drinks for all of them and about fifteen minutes later they are all back around the table eating.

"So, what's the plan for tonight?" Josh asks as he takes a big bite of pepperoni pizza.

Michelle shrugs, "A movie maybe?"

"Sure, I can get us in free," Josh says. "Anything you guys want to see?"

"Well, you and I have seen just about everything," Charlie points out, "so why don't we let them decide."

"That's fine," Josh says.

"I really don't know," Bax says. "I'm not much of a movie buff."

"Why don't we do something else then," Josh suggests.

"Sure, I'm up for anything. What did you have in mind?" Bax asks.

Josh grins at Charlie and Michelle. "How are you all on roller skates?"

Michelle gives Charlie an odd look. "He's kidding, right?"

Charlie shakes her head and smiles, looking at Josh, then back to Michelle and Bax. She replies, "I'm afraid not."

"Dr. Greene, call for you on two," Randi says as Mark approaches the desk.

"Thanks," he says and goes over to the phone. He punches line two. "Mark Greene," he says into the receiver.

"Mark, hey, it's Susan," he hears.

"Oh, hi Susan. What's up?"

"Nothing . . . just thought I'd see how you're doing."

"I'm fine, don't worry," he says. "Listen, I have to get going. We're really getting slammed. Maybe we can talk later."

"Okay, I'll call . . ." she starts to say but she is cut off as Mark hangs up the phone, "you later," she finishes her sentence to herself as the dial tone sounds. "Jeez," she says under her breath and hangs up the phone.

Susan walks into the doctor's lounge of Mercy General and sits in one of the worn sofas. She lays her head against the back of the sofa and closes her eyes, letting out a deep sigh.

The door to the lounge swings open and in walks her fellow attending, Dr. Benjamin Hendrix. She had come here expecting Ben Hendrix to be uptight and controlling like Kerry Weaver, but she had been pleasantly surprised by him. He was kind and caring and a very good doctor. He was also gorgeous. Susan hadn't seen so many nurses swoon at the sight of a man in a white coat since Doug Ross' first day at County. "Hi there Dr. Lewis, rough day?" he asks as he heads for the coffee pot. He turns to her to flash his pearly white smile her way.

"You have no idea," she moans.

He chuckles a little. "It gets better, don't worry."

"Oh, it's not the job, not really," Susan says as she looks over at him.

"Coffee?" he offers.

"Sure, thanks," she replies and he brings her a Styrofoam cup.

"So, if it's not that then what? Nothing's wrong I hope."

"No, I'm fine," Susan says quietly.

"I don't mean to pry Dr. Lewis . . ."

"Susan, please," she tells him.

He smiles. "Susan . . . I don't mean to pry but you certainly don't look fine."

"Dr. Hendrix . . ."

"Ben."

"Ben, I'm fine. It's just . . . a friend of mine has been having some problems and I'm a little worried about him. It'll be okay though, don't worry."

"I'm sorry Susan, I'm being very presumptuous," he says.

"No, that's okay. You're just being nice," she smiles.

"Listen, why don't we go grab a bite to eat tonight? We can go to this great little Italian place I know."

Susan smiles slightly, then says, "I'm sorry, I have other plans."

"Oh well, another time then maybe." Susan nods. "Well, I'd better go get back to work. You're sure you're okay?"

"Positive, thanks Ben." He smiles then turns to leave. Susan sighs and lays her head back down on the couch.

Mark hangs up the phone quickly and looks around the ER. It's the slowest day they've had in two weeks. So why did he just tell Susan that he had to go because they were so busy? He sighs and walks away from the desk, headed for the stairs.

Opening the door to the roof, Mark feels the warm breeze that's blowing through Chicago today. He walks to the edge and looks out over the city. It's July 3rd and the city seems to be at a lull. He knows that will all change tomorrow. Holidays always seem to bring the crazies out of the woodwork. He's on all day today and tomorrow but he doesn't care. He hadn't planned to celebrate the Fourth anyway.

Mark is still lost in his own self pity when the significance of tomorrow's date suddenly occurs to him. He feels terrible that he could have forgotten the date . . . July 4th. He turns quickly and walks back downstairs.

"Kerry!" Mark calls when he sees Kerry Weaver in the hall ahead of him.

"Yeah, what can I do for you, Mark?" she asks as she turns to wait for him.

"I need to leave for a while. There's something I have to do," he says, offering her no further information.

Kerry looks at him curiously but nods. "Sure, we're not busy. Is everything okay?" she asks as she sees that he seems slightly frantic.

"Yeah, thanks Kerry. I'll be back . . ." he replies and with that he takes off for the door as she watches after him with a questioning gaze.

Just after 2pm Doug emerges from the shower. He pulls on some sweatpants and a T-shirt and runs his hands through his damp hair. He walks downstairs and looks around but sees no sign of Carol. He goes back upstairs to look for her. Knowing she's not in their bedroom, he figures he has a pretty good idea of the next place he should look.

Doug eases open the door to the nursery and peers in. "Carol, hon, you in here?" he says softly. He sees her sitting in the floor looking towards the window. Doug walks further into the room and sits down beside her. She looks at him with a sad and forlorn expression. He smoothes her cheek with his hand. "You okay?" he asks quietly.

Carol shrugs as tears fill her eyes. "Sometimes it seems like so long ago . . ." she says. "But today it just doesn't feel like it's been almost a year." Her voice cracks and a tear slides down her cheek. She looks Doug right in the eyes and whispers, "I miss her."

He quickly wraps his arms around her and holds her close. "I know baby, I know," he says in a soothing voice as she tries to hold back her tears. "It's okay, I miss her too."

Carol pulls back suddenly and gives him a frightened look. She says, "What if she was our only chance, Doug? What if I can't have a baby?"

Doug returns her sad gaze, then brushes away the tears from her cheeks. "Then we'll get through that when we get there. Right now we just have to believe. That's all we can do."

Carol nods and pulls herself closer to him, melting back into his arms. He brings his arms around to envelop her and cradle her to him. "I love you," he whispers.

"I love you, too," Carol responds. "Doug, what are we going to do tomorrow?" she asks.

"I don't know Carol, I really don't," he responds as he kisses her hair.

She sits there in his arms for a few minutes. They both seem to be in a different place, both back to that day almost a year ago when their whole world came crashing down. Finally, Carol sits back and looks at him. She wipes the tears from her eyes and sniffs. "We should go in the morning," Carol says. "I want to go visit her tomorrow."

"Yeah, we should. I'll see if Charlie wants to come with us."

Carol nods. "Mandy at Dr. Stillwell's office said they might get the results in tomorrow," she says quietly.

"We shouldn't have made the appointment for Friday," Doug says, his arms still around her. They had gone in just yesterday for Carol's follow up with the specialist she had been seeing since they'd begun trying to have a baby. The doctor had run some tests and told her that they'd be back in touch with her by Monday to let her know the results. The best case scenario would be if she were already pregnant. The worst would be if they had found another obstacle to Carol having a child. "You don't need this to worry about on top of everything else this weekend," he says.

"I'll be fine," she assures him as she brings her hands up to cover his while he strokes her arms lightly.

"You're so strong . . ." he says. "Stronger than I could ever be."

"No, I'm not," Carol says as she leans back into his arms, her back to his chest. "I feel like the weakest person on earth right about now," she admits.

"No, you aren't. You've been through so much . . . I don't know anyone I admire as much as you, Carol." He grasps her hands and wraps his arms around her, pulling her arms along with his own. His chin rest on her shoulder and he says quietly, "No matter what happens, never forget how much I love you."

Carol turns slightly to look back at him. "I won't . . . I couldn't." She closes her eyes and leans back against him, savoring the feel of his arms around her and the warmth of his skin. Only he can make her feel this safe and secure and she wants to hold onto that feeling for as long as possible.

Doug and Carol remain there on the floor of the nursery for a long time. They hold each other as they grieve for all they have lost even while they pray for what they hope they will receive.

Back Forward

This page hosted by Get your own Free Homepage