If operating systems were airlines
DOS Air
All the passengers go out onto the runway, grab hold of the plane, push it until it gets into the air, hop on, jump off when it hits the ground. Then they grab the plane again, push it back into the air, hop on, et cetera.
Mac Airways
The cashiers, flight attendants and pilots all look the same, feel the same and act the same. When asked question about the flight, they reply that you don't want to know, don't need to know and would you please return to your seat and watch the movie.
Windows Airlines
The terminal is very neat and clean, the attendants - all very attractive, the pilots - very capable. The fleet of Learjets the carrier operates is immense. Your jet takes off without a hitch, pushing above the clouds, and at 20,000 feet it explodes without warning.
OS/2 Skyways
The terminal is almost empty, with only a few prospective passengers milling about. The announcer says that their flight has just departed, wishes them a good flight, though there are no planes on the runway. Airline personnel walk around, apologizing profusely to customers in hushed voices, pointing from time to time to the sleek, powerful jets outside the terminal on the field. They tell each passenger how good the real flight will be on one of these new jets and how much safer it will be than Windows Airlines, but that they will have to wait a little longer for the technicians to finish the flight systems. Maybe until mid1995. Maybe longer.
Fly Windows NT
All the passengers carry their seats out onto the tarmac, placing the chairs in the outline of a plane. They all sit down, flap their wings and make jet swooshing sounds as if they are flying.
Unix Express
All passengers bring a piece of the aeroplane and a box of tools with them to the airport. They gather on the tarmac, arguing constantly about what kind of plane they want to build and how to put it together. Eventually, the passengers split into groups and build several different aircraft, but give them all the same name. Some passengers actually reach their destinations. All passengers believe they got there.
Wings of OS/400
The airline has bought ancient DC-3s, arguable the best and safest planes that ever flew, and painted "747" on their tails to make them look as if they are fast. The flight attendants, of course, attend to your every need, though the drinks cost $15 a pop. Stupid questions cost $230 per hour, unless you have SupportLine, which requires a first class ticket and membership in the frequent flyer club. Then they cost $500, but your accounting department can call it overhead.
MVS Air Lines
The passengers all gather in the hangar, watching hundreds of technicians check the flight systems on this immense, luxury aircraft. The plane has at least 10 engines and seats for over 1,000 passengers; bigger models in the fleet can have more engines that anyone can count and fly even more passengers than there are on Earth. It is claimed to cost less per passenger mile to operate these humongous planes than any other aircraft ever built, unless you personally have to pay for the ticket. All the passengers scramble aboard, as do the 200 technicians needed to keep it from crashing. The pilot takes his place up in the glass cockpit. He guns the engines, only to realize that the plane is too big to get though the hangar doors.
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Outline
DOS Air
All the passengers go out onto the runway, grab hold of the plane, push it until it gets into the air, hop on, jump off when it hits the ground. Then they grab the plane again, push it back into the air, hop on, et cetera.
Mac Airways
The cashiers, flight attendants and pilots all look the same, feel the same and act the same. When asked question about the flight, they reply that you don't want to know, don't need to know and would you please return to your seat and watch the movie.
Windows Airlines
The terminal is very neat and clean, the attendants - all very attractive, the pilots - very capable. The fleet of Learjets the carrier operates is immense. Your jet takes off without a hitch, pushing above the clouds, and at 20,000 feet it explodes without warning.
OS/2 Skyways
The terminal is almost empty, with only a few prospective passengers milling about. The announcer says that their flight has just departed, wishes them a good flight, though there are no planes on the runway. Airline personnel walk around, apologizing profusely to customers in hushed voices, pointing from time to time to the sleek, powerful jets outside the terminal on the field. They tell each passenger how good the real flight will be on one of these new jets and how much safer it will be than Windows Airlines, but that they will have to wait a little longer for the technicians to finish the flight systems. Maybe until mid1995. Maybe longer.
Fly Windows NT
All the passengers carry their seats out onto the tarmac, placing the chairs in the outline of a plane. They all sit down, flap their wings and make jet swooshing sounds as if they are flying.
Unix Express
All passengers bring a piece of the aeroplane and a box of tools with them to the airport. They gather on the tarmac, arguing constantly about what kind of plane they want to build and how to put it together. Eventually, the passengers split into groups and build several different aircraft, but give them all the same name. Some passengers actually reach their destinations. All passengers believe they got there.
Wings of OS/400
The airline has bought ancient DC-3s, arguable the best and safest planes that ever flew, and painted "747" on their tails to make them look as if they are fast. The flight attendants, of course, attend to your every need, though the drinks cost $15 a pop. Stupid questions cost $230 per hour, unless you have SupportLine, which requires a first class ticket and membership in the frequent flyer club. Then they cost $500, but your accounting department can call it overhead.
MVS Air Lines
The passengers all gather in the hangar, watching hundreds of technicians check the flight systems on this immense, luxury aircraft. The plane has at least 10 engines and seats for over 1,000 passengers; bigger models in the fleet can have more engines that anyone can count and fly even more passengers than there are on Earth. It is claimed to cost less per passenger mile to operate these humongous planes than any other aircraft ever built, unless you personally have to pay for the ticket. All the passengers scramble aboard, as do the 200 technicians needed to keep it from crashing. The pilot takes his place up in the glass cockpit. He guns the engines, only to realize that the plane is too big to get though the hangar doors.
Welcome Page |
Home |
No Frills |
Résumé |
Aircraft Main |
Aircraft Pics 1 |
Aircraft Pics 2
Aircraft Pics 3 |
Aircraft Pics 4 |
Cars Etc. |
Home and Garden 1 |
Home and Garden 2
New Stuff |
World Time |
Search the Web |
Aviation Humor | Links
Outline
All the passengers go out onto the runway, grab hold of the plane, push it until it gets into the air, hop on, jump off when it hits the ground. Then they grab the plane again, push it back into the air, hop on, et cetera.
Mac Airways
The cashiers, flight attendants and pilots all look the same, feel the same and act the same. When asked question about the flight, they reply that you don't want to know, don't need to know and would you please return to your seat and watch the movie.
Windows Airlines
The terminal is very neat and clean, the attendants - all very attractive, the pilots - very capable. The fleet of Learjets the carrier operates is immense. Your jet takes off without a hitch, pushing above the clouds, and at 20,000 feet it explodes without warning.
OS/2 Skyways
The terminal is almost empty, with only a few prospective passengers milling about. The announcer says that their flight has just departed, wishes them a good flight, though there are no planes on the runway. Airline personnel walk around, apologizing profusely to customers in hushed voices, pointing from time to time to the sleek, powerful jets outside the terminal on the field. They tell each passenger how good the real flight will be on one of these new jets and how much safer it will be than Windows Airlines, but that they will have to wait a little longer for the technicians to finish the flight systems. Maybe until mid1995. Maybe longer.
Fly Windows NT
All the passengers carry their seats out onto the tarmac, placing the chairs in the outline of a plane. They all sit down, flap their wings and make jet swooshing sounds as if they are flying.
Unix Express
All passengers bring a piece of the aeroplane and a box of tools with them to the airport. They gather on the tarmac, arguing constantly about what kind of plane they want to build and how to put it together. Eventually, the passengers split into groups and build several different aircraft, but give them all the same name. Some passengers actually reach their destinations. All passengers believe they got there.
Wings of OS/400
The airline has bought ancient DC-3s, arguable the best and safest planes that ever flew, and painted "747" on their tails to make them look as if they are fast. The flight attendants, of course, attend to your every need, though the drinks cost $15 a pop. Stupid questions cost $230 per hour, unless you have SupportLine, which requires a first class ticket and membership in the frequent flyer club. Then they cost $500, but your accounting department can call it overhead.
MVS Air Lines
The passengers all gather in the hangar, watching hundreds of technicians check the flight systems on this immense, luxury aircraft. The plane has at least 10 engines and seats for over 1,000 passengers; bigger models in the fleet can have more engines that anyone can count and fly even more passengers than there are on Earth. It is claimed to cost less per passenger mile to operate these humongous planes than any other aircraft ever built, unless you personally have to pay for the ticket. All the passengers scramble aboard, as do the 200 technicians needed to keep it from crashing. The pilot takes his place up in the glass cockpit. He guns the engines, only to realize that the plane is too big to get though the hangar doors.
Welcome Page |
Home |
No Frills |
Résumé |
Aircraft Main |
Aircraft Pics 1 |
Aircraft Pics 2
Aircraft Pics 3 |
Aircraft Pics 4 |
Cars Etc. |
Home and Garden 1 |
Home and Garden 2
New Stuff |
World Time |
Search the Web |
Aviation Humor | Links
Outline
The cashiers, flight attendants and pilots all look the same, feel the same and act the same. When asked question about the flight, they reply that you don't want to know, don't need to know and would you please return to your seat and watch the movie.
Windows Airlines
The terminal is very neat and clean, the attendants - all very attractive, the pilots - very capable. The fleet of Learjets the carrier operates is immense. Your jet takes off without a hitch, pushing above the clouds, and at 20,000 feet it explodes without warning.
OS/2 Skyways
The terminal is almost empty, with only a few prospective passengers milling about. The announcer says that their flight has just departed, wishes them a good flight, though there are no planes on the runway. Airline personnel walk around, apologizing profusely to customers in hushed voices, pointing from time to time to the sleek, powerful jets outside the terminal on the field. They tell each passenger how good the real flight will be on one of these new jets and how much safer it will be than Windows Airlines, but that they will have to wait a little longer for the technicians to finish the flight systems. Maybe until mid1995. Maybe longer.
Fly Windows NT
All the passengers carry their seats out onto the tarmac, placing the chairs in the outline of a plane. They all sit down, flap their wings and make jet swooshing sounds as if they are flying.
Unix Express
All passengers bring a piece of the aeroplane and a box of tools with them to the airport. They gather on the tarmac, arguing constantly about what kind of plane they want to build and how to put it together. Eventually, the passengers split into groups and build several different aircraft, but give them all the same name. Some passengers actually reach their destinations. All passengers believe they got there.
Wings of OS/400
The airline has bought ancient DC-3s, arguable the best and safest planes that ever flew, and painted "747" on their tails to make them look as if they are fast. The flight attendants, of course, attend to your every need, though the drinks cost $15 a pop. Stupid questions cost $230 per hour, unless you have SupportLine, which requires a first class ticket and membership in the frequent flyer club. Then they cost $500, but your accounting department can call it overhead.
MVS Air Lines
The passengers all gather in the hangar, watching hundreds of technicians check the flight systems on this immense, luxury aircraft. The plane has at least 10 engines and seats for over 1,000 passengers; bigger models in the fleet can have more engines that anyone can count and fly even more passengers than there are on Earth. It is claimed to cost less per passenger mile to operate these humongous planes than any other aircraft ever built, unless you personally have to pay for the ticket. All the passengers scramble aboard, as do the 200 technicians needed to keep it from crashing. The pilot takes his place up in the glass cockpit. He guns the engines, only to realize that the plane is too big to get though the hangar doors.
Welcome Page |
Home |
No Frills |
Résumé |
Aircraft Main |
Aircraft Pics 1 |
Aircraft Pics 2
Aircraft Pics 3 |
Aircraft Pics 4 |
Cars Etc. |
Home and Garden 1 |
Home and Garden 2
New Stuff |
World Time |
Search the Web |
Aviation Humor | Links
Outline
The terminal is very neat and clean, the attendants - all very attractive, the pilots - very capable. The fleet of Learjets the carrier operates is immense. Your jet takes off without a hitch, pushing above the clouds, and at 20,000 feet it explodes without warning.
OS/2 Skyways
The terminal is almost empty, with only a few prospective passengers milling about. The announcer says that their flight has just departed, wishes them a good flight, though there are no planes on the runway. Airline personnel walk around, apologizing profusely to customers in hushed voices, pointing from time to time to the sleek, powerful jets outside the terminal on the field. They tell each passenger how good the real flight will be on one of these new jets and how much safer it will be than Windows Airlines, but that they will have to wait a little longer for the technicians to finish the flight systems. Maybe until mid1995. Maybe longer.
Fly Windows NT
All the passengers carry their seats out onto the tarmac, placing the chairs in the outline of a plane. They all sit down, flap their wings and make jet swooshing sounds as if they are flying.
Unix Express
All passengers bring a piece of the aeroplane and a box of tools with them to the airport. They gather on the tarmac, arguing constantly about what kind of plane they want to build and how to put it together. Eventually, the passengers split into groups and build several different aircraft, but give them all the same name. Some passengers actually reach their destinations. All passengers believe they got there.
Wings of OS/400
The airline has bought ancient DC-3s, arguable the best and safest planes that ever flew, and painted "747" on their tails to make them look as if they are fast. The flight attendants, of course, attend to your every need, though the drinks cost $15 a pop. Stupid questions cost $230 per hour, unless you have SupportLine, which requires a first class ticket and membership in the frequent flyer club. Then they cost $500, but your accounting department can call it overhead.
MVS Air Lines
The passengers all gather in the hangar, watching hundreds of technicians check the flight systems on this immense, luxury aircraft. The plane has at least 10 engines and seats for over 1,000 passengers; bigger models in the fleet can have more engines that anyone can count and fly even more passengers than there are on Earth. It is claimed to cost less per passenger mile to operate these humongous planes than any other aircraft ever built, unless you personally have to pay for the ticket. All the passengers scramble aboard, as do the 200 technicians needed to keep it from crashing. The pilot takes his place up in the glass cockpit. He guns the engines, only to realize that the plane is too big to get though the hangar doors.
Welcome Page |
Home |
No Frills |
Résumé |
Aircraft Main |
Aircraft Pics 1 |
Aircraft Pics 2
Aircraft Pics 3 |
Aircraft Pics 4 |
Cars Etc. |
Home and Garden 1 |
Home and Garden 2
New Stuff |
World Time |
Search the Web |
Aviation Humor | Links
Outline
The terminal is almost empty, with only a few prospective passengers milling about. The announcer says that their flight has just departed, wishes them a good flight, though there are no planes on the runway. Airline personnel walk around, apologizing profusely to customers in hushed voices, pointing from time to time to the sleek, powerful jets outside the terminal on the field. They tell each passenger how good the real flight will be on one of these new jets and how much safer it will be than Windows Airlines, but that they will have to wait a little longer for the technicians to finish the flight systems. Maybe until mid1995. Maybe longer.
Fly Windows NT
All the passengers carry their seats out onto the tarmac, placing the chairs in the outline of a plane. They all sit down, flap their wings and make jet swooshing sounds as if they are flying.
Unix Express
All passengers bring a piece of the aeroplane and a box of tools with them to the airport. They gather on the tarmac, arguing constantly about what kind of plane they want to build and how to put it together. Eventually, the passengers split into groups and build several different aircraft, but give them all the same name. Some passengers actually reach their destinations. All passengers believe they got there.
Wings of OS/400
The airline has bought ancient DC-3s, arguable the best and safest planes that ever flew, and painted "747" on their tails to make them look as if they are fast. The flight attendants, of course, attend to your every need, though the drinks cost $15 a pop. Stupid questions cost $230 per hour, unless you have SupportLine, which requires a first class ticket and membership in the frequent flyer club. Then they cost $500, but your accounting department can call it overhead.
MVS Air Lines
The passengers all gather in the hangar, watching hundreds of technicians check the flight systems on this immense, luxury aircraft. The plane has at least 10 engines and seats for over 1,000 passengers; bigger models in the fleet can have more engines that anyone can count and fly even more passengers than there are on Earth. It is claimed to cost less per passenger mile to operate these humongous planes than any other aircraft ever built, unless you personally have to pay for the ticket. All the passengers scramble aboard, as do the 200 technicians needed to keep it from crashing. The pilot takes his place up in the glass cockpit. He guns the engines, only to realize that the plane is too big to get though the hangar doors.
Welcome Page |
Home |
No Frills |
Résumé |
Aircraft Main |
Aircraft Pics 1 |
Aircraft Pics 2
Aircraft Pics 3 |
Aircraft Pics 4 |
Cars Etc. |
Home and Garden 1 |
Home and Garden 2
New Stuff |
World Time |
Search the Web |
Aviation Humor | Links
Outline
All the passengers carry their seats out onto the tarmac, placing the chairs in the outline of a plane. They all sit down, flap their wings and make jet swooshing sounds as if they are flying.
Unix Express
All passengers bring a piece of the aeroplane and a box of tools with them to the airport. They gather on the tarmac, arguing constantly about what kind of plane they want to build and how to put it together. Eventually, the passengers split into groups and build several different aircraft, but give them all the same name. Some passengers actually reach their destinations. All passengers believe they got there.
Wings of OS/400
The airline has bought ancient DC-3s, arguable the best and safest planes that ever flew, and painted "747" on their tails to make them look as if they are fast. The flight attendants, of course, attend to your every need, though the drinks cost $15 a pop. Stupid questions cost $230 per hour, unless you have SupportLine, which requires a first class ticket and membership in the frequent flyer club. Then they cost $500, but your accounting department can call it overhead.
MVS Air Lines
The passengers all gather in the hangar, watching hundreds of technicians check the flight systems on this immense, luxury aircraft. The plane has at least 10 engines and seats for over 1,000 passengers; bigger models in the fleet can have more engines that anyone can count and fly even more passengers than there are on Earth. It is claimed to cost less per passenger mile to operate these humongous planes than any other aircraft ever built, unless you personally have to pay for the ticket. All the passengers scramble aboard, as do the 200 technicians needed to keep it from crashing. The pilot takes his place up in the glass cockpit. He guns the engines, only to realize that the plane is too big to get though the hangar doors.
Welcome Page |
Home |
No Frills |
Résumé |
Aircraft Main |
Aircraft Pics 1 |
Aircraft Pics 2
Aircraft Pics 3 |
Aircraft Pics 4 |
Cars Etc. |
Home and Garden 1 |
Home and Garden 2
New Stuff |
World Time |
Search the Web |
Aviation Humor | Links
Outline
All passengers bring a piece of the aeroplane and a box of tools with them to the airport. They gather on the tarmac, arguing constantly about what kind of plane they want to build and how to put it together. Eventually, the passengers split into groups and build several different aircraft, but give them all the same name. Some passengers actually reach their destinations. All passengers believe they got there.
Wings of OS/400
The airline has bought ancient DC-3s, arguable the best and safest planes that ever flew, and painted "747" on their tails to make them look as if they are fast. The flight attendants, of course, attend to your every need, though the drinks cost $15 a pop. Stupid questions cost $230 per hour, unless you have SupportLine, which requires a first class ticket and membership in the frequent flyer club. Then they cost $500, but your accounting department can call it overhead.
MVS Air Lines
The passengers all gather in the hangar, watching hundreds of technicians check the flight systems on this immense, luxury aircraft. The plane has at least 10 engines and seats for over 1,000 passengers; bigger models in the fleet can have more engines that anyone can count and fly even more passengers than there are on Earth. It is claimed to cost less per passenger mile to operate these humongous planes than any other aircraft ever built, unless you personally have to pay for the ticket. All the passengers scramble aboard, as do the 200 technicians needed to keep it from crashing. The pilot takes his place up in the glass cockpit. He guns the engines, only to realize that the plane is too big to get though the hangar doors.
Welcome Page |
Home |
No Frills |
Résumé |
Aircraft Main |
Aircraft Pics 1 |
Aircraft Pics 2
Aircraft Pics 3 |
Aircraft Pics 4 |
Cars Etc. |
Home and Garden 1 |
Home and Garden 2
New Stuff |
World Time |
Search the Web |
Aviation Humor | Links
Outline
The airline has bought ancient DC-3s, arguable the best and safest planes that ever flew, and painted "747" on their tails to make them look as if they are fast. The flight attendants, of course, attend to your every need, though the drinks cost $15 a pop. Stupid questions cost $230 per hour, unless you have SupportLine, which requires a first class ticket and membership in the frequent flyer club. Then they cost $500, but your accounting department can call it overhead.
MVS Air Lines
The passengers all gather in the hangar, watching hundreds of technicians check the flight systems on this immense, luxury aircraft. The plane has at least 10 engines and seats for over 1,000 passengers; bigger models in the fleet can have more engines that anyone can count and fly even more passengers than there are on Earth. It is claimed to cost less per passenger mile to operate these humongous planes than any other aircraft ever built, unless you personally have to pay for the ticket. All the passengers scramble aboard, as do the 200 technicians needed to keep it from crashing. The pilot takes his place up in the glass cockpit. He guns the engines, only to realize that the plane is too big to get though the hangar doors.
Welcome Page |
Home |
No Frills |
Résumé |
Aircraft Main |
Aircraft Pics 1 |
Aircraft Pics 2
Aircraft Pics 3 |
Aircraft Pics 4 |
Cars Etc. |
Home and Garden 1 |
Home and Garden 2
New Stuff |
World Time |
Search the Web |
Aviation Humor | Links
Outline
The passengers all gather in the hangar, watching hundreds of technicians check the flight systems on this immense, luxury aircraft. The plane has at least 10 engines and seats for over 1,000 passengers; bigger models in the fleet can have more engines that anyone can count and fly even more passengers than there are on Earth. It is claimed to cost less per passenger mile to operate these humongous planes than any other aircraft ever built, unless you personally have to pay for the ticket. All the passengers scramble aboard, as do the 200 technicians needed to keep it from crashing. The pilot takes his place up in the glass cockpit. He guns the engines, only to realize that the plane is too big to get though the hangar doors.
Welcome Page |
Home |
No Frills |
Résumé |
Aircraft Main |
Aircraft Pics 1 |
Aircraft Pics 2
Aircraft Pics 3 |
Aircraft Pics 4 |
Cars Etc. |
Home and Garden 1 |
Home and Garden 2
New Stuff |
World Time |
Search the Web |
Aviation Humor | Links
Outline