by: Steven Vandre (C) all rights reserved etcetry etcetry
I have begun this letter five times and I've torn it up five times. The words that I wanted to say didn't come easy to me. Perhaps I had thought those letters were too forward or anger-filled. The furthest thing from my mind is hurting you, and I had to bend over backwards to make sure this letter fit that standard.
Funny, isn't it, that I never let on or dropped a hint? I never flirted with you or gave you extra special attention. I didn't want to make ripples, I didn't want to turn you away from me. But now, I must sing how I feel from the roof tops. Whatever your response is, it will be satisfactory. Only, please make a reply. No is not the worst answer, but no answer is the worst. In my experiences this has been true.
By now you wonder how I feel, eh? I was hoping to inspire such curiosity. So this is how I feel; I feel that I truly, whole heartedly love you. I would die for all eternity that even the smallest pain would not reach you. For you I would do anything, be anything. You are a great treasure, and I am but a peasent by comparison. I do not even deserve to gaze upon your beautious visage, which I so need to continue living.
Please reply soon. All contact information is enclosed. How do you feel about me? Please be honest, but if anything, do reply. My heart is only taped from the last shreading, I wish not for such a cataclysmic accurance, for I would surely be destroyed.
Forgive the pressure this letter implies, for by no means should you feel rushed. Time to think is a great thing, for I myself had to think before I discovered my love for you.
I look forward to seeing you at school
with love,
Jimmy Brown
Jimmy sat back with admiration for what he had just accomplished. Neatly folding the notebook paper, he set it in his desk drawer. "I'll give it to her tommorow", he thought. He turned out his light and went to sleep.
The buzzing of an alarm awoke our protagonist, but it also awoke doubts. His feeling of inferiority had increased greatly, and he didn't want to make Cecilia feel akward. He grabbed the note and stuck it in his back pocket."I'll give myself the alternative, and I can always back down." He thought.
The car ride to school was enjoyable as always. Jimmy loved his music with an unsaid passion. One could even say he had an unquenchable thirst for his music. The music was hard and loud, fueling Jimmy for what was ahead. "I have to be strong-willed." he thought.
Head down and posture slouched, the lanky 18 year old sauntered past the threshold of his school. Occaissionaly anger swelled as he passed students he disliked, while othr times he would smile a hello to a friend. Thusly the day slowly trudged along, and Jimmy backed down from opportunity after opportunity. "I'll give it to her after school, by the exit." He thought.
Jimmy stood outside in the bright sunshine, feeling somewhat consoled by the soft breeze and smattering of puffy white clouds. He had waited fifteen minutes, and the most of the students were gone. Then, who would grace the plainly decored push-door but the lovely Cecilia. "This is my big momment, I won't screw it up." He thought.
He smiled widely and followed her graceful frame down the cemented steps towards her mom's car. Then, as if he were jabbed with a pin, a new plan formed and forced it's way out.
"Cecilia, wait!" He cried out. Cecilia stopped, but did not turn. I can't use the note, he thought, it's too personal. What do I do? The only thing that came to mind was the best he could do...."
"Cecilia, you're breakin' my heart. Your shaking my confidence daily. Oh Cecilia, I'm down on my knees, I'm begging you please to love me! (To simon and Gafunkle fans, I did substitute some words.)
Cecilia remained stationary, then walked to her car and left. Jimmy stood dead cold, then looked for his letter, but it was gone.
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