"My father...Isn't he cute? You just want to hug him and stick pins into him and..." -Nikki
"Just goes to show, you can't turn a silk purse into a cows ear. Me being the silk purse of course." -Schmeid
"You know, that place in Japan" -Schmeid
"Onomatopoeia?" -Tonky
"Should all areas with minerals be mined?" -Schmeid
...
"No, because we'll run out of oxygen and die." -Tim Port
"I don't have sick fantasies, they're really good!" -Nat
"All the guys in Macbeth are fugly and gay..Brendan will like it" -Sarah
"And all of them have bad hair-dos, like Brendan too." -Sarah
*puts the phone gently back into the reciever* "Up yours too, motherless spawn of satan!" -Sarah's dad.
":( :) :P :S :O <--- There is no plotting smiley! ARGH! How am I supposed to work under such conditions?!" -Sarah
"You are so talented you lazy bumhead! Now that I've happily fixed up your self-esteem..." -Sarah
"Philosophers? Don't they, like, run around without towels screaming 'Eureka!' which is some foreign language for 'Get me a towel you dolt!'" -Sarah
Anika: good, was worried i'd look stupid for a moment there...
Dibley: no you'd never look stupid
Sarah: *kills self laughing*
"Walking in Kotara at midnight is really fun. There's no cars, so you can just hear the traffic lights going 'bling' 'bling' 'bling'... It's like fairy lights, only sound, and not only at christmas time!" -Tum
"The woman had a crazy glint in her eye, like a deranged weazel with conjunctivitis and no eyelids." -Tum
"If your stepmother has a new puppy that likes to chew things, never, ever ever ever ever ever leave an open bottle of vodka on the floor. Ever." -Shelley
"she wouldn't recognise a cultured voice if it whacked her in the face with a rotting sausage." -Shelley
"The GSCoD decided that the best way to spread doom and destruction was to devour the brain of John Howard, thereby leaving Australia confused and leaderless for at least ten minutes (which is how long it would take for George Bush to call his speech writer and have him write a stirring speech declaring Australia the 51st state of America. God bless America, our home sweet home...)" -Shelley
Miss Cairns: Its estimated that at the time of European settlement there were around six hundred languages in Australia...
David: Were they English miss?
Miss Cairns: Yes David. There were six hundred languages, and they were all English.
Shelley: Nobody is allowed to reply to this message. Anyone who replies will be kicked. Thank you for listening.
...
Shelley: Nooooo! My perfect post, ruined by you gibbering plebeians!
"Tell him to go buy ice cream. It might not help him get the girl, but at least when she rejects him he'll have an ice cream." -Shelley
"Oh crap, my daughter's gone blue. We'll take her to the emergency room, as soon as I've had a coffee and a cigarette." -Shelley's Mum
"Write a horoscope for Macbeth. 'Today you will go mad and die' " - Megan
"Maths is Fun! Fun is Maths! Yuk, now I'll have to wash my hands for writing that." -Megan
"Maths is Fun? Fun is Maths? Urgh! What was I thinking that day." -Megan
Mr Hookham: And then there's the people who don't care. Those that hand in their assignments hastily resarched, scrapily written and badly organised
Dibley: I resent that. It was well organised.